All My Children Transcript Friday 10/21/05
Provided By Boo
Proofread by Gisele
Tad: We had a miracle, but it slipped away.
J.R.: My mother's dead. She ain't coming back.
Tad: I don't think now is a very good time.
Di: Please? Just a minute with J.R.?
Tad: J.R.? I'll be checking your brother.
J.R.: My mother's dead.
Di: Oh, J.R. honey, I'm so sorry. I -- I wish I could take it all away, all your hurt, and I tried. The wrong, wrong way. I wanted to give her back to you. You needed her. And once I met you, I needed you, too. I called you my son, because in my heart -- oh. You're a son to be proud of. You have so much love locked up in that chest. But when you -- when you let it out, baby, it lights up the world. You lit up mine, and what I gave back to you, that was real. Forget -- forget my name or where I'm from, J.R. That was the love. And it's all still there, and I want to give it to you. J.R., will you -- will you let me? Please, baby, will you -- will you let me try and make it up to you?
Tad: Are you ok?
Jamie: Just like you and J.R. Never better.
Krystal: Well, she did what you told her to. Did you get what you wanted?
Adam: Yeah, Barry, get the civil suit started. I'll call the police.
Tad: For once in your miserable life, you're going to back off. This is J.R.ís to end. However he wants it is the way it's going to be.
Zach: Whatever it takes, the offer stands.
Kendall: Because I need protection?
Zach: I don't know why Ryan came back. I don't know what he wants. But you're right, so we'll know that the baby's coming, and I will be here to protect you.
Kendall: My hero? My knight?
Zach: I don't know. God, between you and Ryan, between you and the world, if you can get past this.
Ryan: Greenlee, you have to know that I love you. Tonight was real. What we have, what we feel, we can have that again -- love, our future. Or it can be over, if that's what you want.
Di: Whatever you want, whatever you need, J.R., tell me. How? I swear, I will do anything to make it up to you. I have no right. But can you please forgive me?
Kendall: You lie and lie and expected me to forgive you.
Ryan: Greenlee, can you forgive me?
Greenlee: Forgive you? How do I do that? How do I forget crying myself sick over you? Forget waking up from the nightmare and then finding out that I'm still living it? How do I black out missing you so much? I thought I'd go crazy for real. The life that didn't make sense without you in it -- where's the magic eraser to make me forget all that?
Ryan: I know there's no magic way to make that disappear, Greenlee. What I've done has been burned into you. And you have every right to feel whatever you --
Greenlee: You don't have one clue how I feel. You have no clue what I've done. You have no idea what's coming.
Ryan: Well, then tell me, Greenlee. Tell me what's coming.
Greenlee: Never mind what's coming. I know now you would never get it.
Ryan: I get a lot more than you know.
Greenlee: You know nothing. You understand nothing. If you did, you wouldn't have left me, run away, played dead, and made me a widow -- again.
Ryan: I did what I thought was best for you.
Greenlee: Best for me. Uh-huh. Let me tell you what it was like to be me when you died. First night, shock, denial. I went to bed wearing your shirt so I could breathe you, feel your arms around me. Wake up, hope. I felt you close to me. Maybe it was all just a bad dream. Reports from the Coast Guard. Rescue changed to recovery. My husband's dead, my husband's dead. If I keep saying it, maybe it'll be real, real, but completely wrong. Forget prayers, pictures. First thing in the morning, last thing at night. Happy, smiling scenes from our marriage. Best year of my life. One minute out of one day I would think I can get through this, I can get over you, I can get over you, I can forget about you. Then I just crash again. The one hope I clung to -- the promise that I made to our future -- our baby. When I lost it, I lost the one thing that got me through. Oh, my God. Lily saw you at the casino. You went back there. I was in our room, in bed, in your shirt, curled up in a ball, believing you were dead, trying to remember how to breathe, and you were at the gazebo convincing Lily you were a ghost? Zach's casino. He knew. He was in on the lie. He knew you were alive.
Kendall: You propped up the lie of the century, giving away nothing, while Greenlee died a little more each day. You stood ringside, and you watched me watch my best friend with her heart aching at the loss of her husband. You let me help create a child to ease her loss, Zach, to give her a part of something to hang on to, a part of Ryan without just screaming in my face "Ryanís alive!" Do you honestly, really expect me to forgive you for any of that?
Zach: Frankly, Kendall, I don't give a damn if you forgive me or not. Knock yourself out. Cry if you have to, make yourself feel better. We both have priorities. Yours is creating an enemy where there isn't one. Mine is protecting you.
Kendall: How in Godís name is what you've done to me called protection?
Zach: You're so caught up in what is done you can't see what's ahead of you. This baby was supposed to be a gift to Greenlee. Now with Ryan back it's a time bomb waiting to explode. Now, you got Ryan, Greenlee, Jackson, and Erica. I'm not going to leave you to fend for yourself.
Kendall: Who are you? What, are you Zach the guilty for running the cruelest con ever? Or Zach the control freak, because you just have to be in charge all the time? Or maybe you're Zach taking pity for the poor hormone-crazed pregnant woman. Which is it, Zach? Are you guilty, control, or pity? Come on, hubby, it's just you and me. Come on, you can tell me. I really want to know what's going on in that twisted head of yours. Please, from the master, I want to know, I want to learn for my own protection.
Zach: Shut up. Shut your mouth, open your eyes, and see that I care about you.
Krystal: Two-fisted drinking. You either need a bigger liver or an AA meeting.
Adam: This one, my wife, is for you. It's a toast to our stunning reversal of fortune. From our failure to expose Dixie to you working your wiles on Del, and I went to Crow Hollow and all I came back with was a hangover and a honeymoon video. All wastes of time and effort, and all we had to do was sit back and wait for that woman to turn the tables on herself. So Dixie is dead and a long life to the half sister, Di Kirby. Wherever she may be for the next 10 or 20 years, I hope it's behind bars.
[Krystal flings her drink at Adamís face.]
Adam: They were living a lie. They'll get over it.
Krystal: Can't you be halfway human? Your son just got hit with his mother's death all over again.
Adam: He's got me. I'm all he needs.
Krystal: You are first cousin to a snake. You'd trade Little Adamís teddy bear for a weasel and call it a good deal.
Adam: I'm not going to let you spoil my good mood. This is a night to celebrate.
Krystal: Yeah? Only if J.R. can find it in his heart to forgive Di.
Adam: No, that's never going to happen. He's too much my son for that.
Di: J.R., I'm asking you to forgive me, not for myself, but for you.
J.R.: Forgive you? Forgive you? Do you know who you were talking to? I'm the knife who cut his wife out of her son's life for turning on me. I'm the payback machine who shredded my brother for sleeping with my wife and stealing my boy. Oh, I could fill a graveyard with as many people who are dead to me. But here you are, with your hand out. Forgive you?
[As Tad watches, J.R. angrily grabs Di by the shoulders and shakes her.]
J.R.: You stole my mother's life. You brought her back from the dead, you brought her back to me, and then you killed her all over again while I watched. Forgive you? I could grab you by the hair and pull you to the gates of hell and God himself would be selling the tickets! Forgive you? You got your answer. Why don't you get out of here.
Di: J.R., however you feel about me now --
J.R.: Is set in stone.
Di: But it doesn't have to be. You don't have to turn into who you described, a man who wears his vengeance like a medal. You can hate me, J.R. You have every right to, but please, please, I am begging you, don't let what I did just destroy all the good that's begun, please.
J.R.: You make me sick. Pack your lies and go. I'm wiping you out of my life. And don't even think about going near my son. Ever. You're as dead to me as my mother.
Tad: J.R. --
J.R.: I want her gone before I get back.
Di: Oh --
Di: Oh Ė
Ryan: Zach wasn't running the show.
Greenlee: He knew you were alive?
Ryan: Yes. He gave me money, wheels, and a new identity.
Greenlee: Aiding and abetting a dead man.
Ryan: He wanted me gone, Greenlee. He was afraid that I would hurt you, and so was I. But I left. It was my choice.
Greenlee: How could you be so selfish? How could you not know me, how I felt about you? You decided all by yourself that I was better off believing you were dead.
Ryan: Yes. And I was wrong. Greenlee, it all started when I took away your choices. You called me on it when I had the procedure, and I didn't tell you. You were right then, and you're right now.
Greenlee: I don't want to be right. If I'm right, you're not the Ryan that I fell in love with.
Ryan: Yes, I am. God, Greenlee, you know how lost I was, how angry I was. That's why I took away your choices. I mean, our love is based on trust, and I couldn't trust myself. I couldn't trust myself not to hurt you. I couldn't trust anyone. Another mistake. It was a mistake, but when I realized it, when I heard you at Erinís cabin, it shocked me back here. My death didn't save you. It didn't free you. It broke you, Greenlee, so I had to come back to fix it, to try and make things right for you.
Greenlee: Stop saying that. What, are you trying to make yourself some sort of homecoming hero?
Ryan: No, Greenlee, this isn't about me. This is you. This is all you. This is completely your choice. You can try to fix what I have ruined, or you can cut me out of your life. It is all you. Now, I want you to take your time. You want me or you want me out of your life. I will respect whatever you decide. But just know this -- I will answer all of your questions. I will tell you exactly where I was, what I found, and what drew me back to you -- everything. Please just tell me. Tell me what you want me to do. It's your choice.
Di: Oh, I swear to God this is not what I wanted, not for J.R., not for Jamie, not for you.
Tad: Don't leave yourself out of the mix, as I'm sure you got a lot less than you bargained for.
Di: Oh, there has to be something, something I can do. Tell me what to do. Help me. I mean, do I crawl on my knees and beg for forgiveness? I don't -- I go away? Let him cool off a little? Maybe even -- even miss me a little? Tell me. Tell me how to take away the pain I brought into this house, Tad. I can't leave it this like this. Oh.
Tad: I told you you had one hope. That was the truth. That hope just walked out of here.
Greenlee: There's no hope for us, Ryan. I don't want you anymore. You killed us when you killed yourself. One second believing you were dead was a lifetime. Three months was an eternity. You crashed your own memorial service. Too bad you missed all the nice things that people had to say about you. I have nothing nice to say now. I don't know you.
Ryan: I deserve that. But just know that I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you if you will let me.
Greenlee: You don't get to apologize for what you did and just forget it. You know all those folks who used to hate me? They traded the hate for pity. I'd walk into a room or restaurant, they'd say, "Oh, poor thing, she must be suffering." You made a fool of me. You have no idea how far I've gone for you, what I've gone through to keep your memory alive. Or what Kendallís gone through.
Ryan: Kendall -- what does she have to do with this?
Greenlee: You betrayed her and me. When you died, Kendall was my rock. I wouldn't have survived that first night without her or all the other nights that she stayed with me because you were gone and you were never coming back. So you see, even if I wanted to forgive you, I couldn't, because if I did, I'd betray the one person who loved me enough to stick by me no matter what. He'd do anything but die for me. So all your talk about going back and starting over, it's a waste of time. As far as I'm concerned, you're still dead.
Zach: You all right?
Kendall: I'm just letting it all sink in. You care about me. In a sadistic kind of way? Like torture treatment? I mean, you do hurt the ones that you love the most. So tell me, where did you stuff your caring when you whisked Ryan back into the dead zone? How does letting Greenlee and me believe that Ryan is dead rank on the compassion scale?
Zach: I helped Ryan vanish because he bruised every life he touched, including yours and Greenleeís.
Kendall: Oh, ok, so that gives you the right to decide Greenleeís fate and mine? You took it upon yourself to rewrite the future for all of us. You encouraged Ryan to stay dead and disappear.
Zach: I did what I did to keep you and your friend out of harm's way.
Kendall: How did -- how did you show that you cared? How did you care? By agreeing to protect Greenlee for Ryan by ripping her heart out? By doing your best to talk me out of carrying Greenleeís baby without giving me the one reason that could have made a difference. I mean, did you really, truly show that you cared when you saw how miserable Greenlee and I were? Is that your idea of caring? Well, you know what? I could really do without your caring, so please, stop, I'm sick of it, no more. Just stop and get the hell out of my life.
Kendall: J.R., I was right. It was all a big fat ugly lie. Ryan's not a miracle. He played us. He survived the fall, but he chose to stay dead. He just ran away. So, you don't have to worry about a background check. I know more than I want to know.
J.R.: I'll take care of it from here.
Krystal: J.R. wonít come out of this.
Adam: Nonsense. He's a Chandler. Sometimes down, never out.
Krystal: Di's been hit pretty hard herself. And it seems like she's truly sorry for all the pain she's caused.
Adam: She damn well should be! She invaded our house, our lives.
Krystal: She's still family, Adam.
Adam: No -- Dixieís family.
Krystal: She's J.R.ís family, too, you barnacle-encrusted piece of ornery. It's clear to anybody with eyes and half a heart that she really, truly cares for your son.
Adam: What is this? You couldn't wait to expose her.
Krystal: Next time I'll be more careful what I wish for.
Adam: Di Kirby endangered everyone in this house with her underworld ties. She should be thrown back into prison and left there to rot.
Krystal: Punishment has been handed out all the way around. Nobody's been shown much in the way of mercy, which is why seeing you guzzling that vodka and crowing about winning just makes me want to toss my cookies.
Adam: It's not just Di and J.R. that your heart bleeds for, is it, Krystal? There's Tad. His heart's pretty well been shattered, too, miserable creature that he is. Him and his three -- count them -- three DNA tests. He got exactly what he deserves.
Krystal: You really are as heartless as they come.
Adam: You know, it's too bad you're married. Tad certainly could use someone to sort of be there to help him pick up the pieces of his poor little old broken heart.
Tad: Lives were destroyed here today. And the fallout's only just started. God only knows what's to come.
Di: So I just leave?
Tad: Yeah. You heard what J.R. said. He wants you out of here by the time he comes back. And unless you're a glutton for punishment, I doubt you would want to be here when he does.
Di: Well -- where do I go? What do I even do? I --
Tad: I don't know. I don't care.
[After writing a note to Greenlee, Ryan leaves the apartment.]
Julia: Hey. Have you got a sec?
Zach: Not really.
Julia: Well, I'll make it quick. I just wanted to let you know I got a call from the new guy who's heading up the task force. And he said they've rounded up the rest of Garret's organization.
Zach: Oh, good. Anything else?
Julia: Well, I just wanted to thank you.
Zach: Yeah? For what?
Julia: For caring.
Zach: I don't care.
Greenlee: He betrayed me.
Kendall: I know.
Julia: What's your problem, Zach? I came here to say thank you, and you throw it back in my face.
Zach: Maybe you didn't get the memo. I don't do caring, sharing, or gratitude. I'm just a jerk who likes to mess in people's lives.
Julia: Well, I'm grateful that you messed in mine.
Zach: Yeah. The damage I cause is its own reward. Do me a favor -- close the doors on the way out.
Julia: Well, either you're as much of a jerk as you say you are, or something's eating at you. Are you going to tell me what it is, or am I going to have to drag it out of you?
Kendall: You should have heard Zachís lame excuses. When you care enough, lie with a straight face no matter how much grief and pain you cause. I mean, if this is how he shows he cares, I don't know what he would do if he hated me.
Greenlee: Are you ready for this? Ryan wants another chance.
Kendall: You going to give him one?
Greenlee: Yeah, right, after I rip off his head and stuff it down his neck.
Kendall: Yeah, I'll give you a boost.
Greenlee: Where does he get off thinking that he can just walk back into my life? "Hi, honey, I'm back from the dead. You want Chinese or Italian?" I wish he'd never come back.
Kendall: Do you really mean that?
Greenlee: Dead, he was still my Ryan, but now? He might as well be dead for all I care. God, how could he do this to me?
Kendall: I think -- I think Ryan believed that he was saving you.
Greenlee: Oh, that's the same crap he handed me. Don't you shove it at me, too.
Krystal: Adam Chandler, you are beyond despicable. That crack about Tad, me wanting to be free to hold his hand?
Adam: You had a thing for him.
Krystal: And it's over.
Adam: No, I don't think it's as over as you insist.
Krystal: Oh, come on. I'm a married woman.
Adam: Yeah, a moonshine marriage, one step above shotgun. But circumstances have changed. Now that Tad has been dumped back into the dating pool, I thought maybe you'd -- well, you'd want to have a little, you know, skinny-dip with him -- with your private eye.
Krystal: Uh-huh. Wouldn't that just float your boat?
Adam: No, Krystal, you know what an incurable romantic I am.
Krystal: Oh, God. What passes as your heart would fit in a flea's navel.
Adam: Well, if I'm so heartless, so utterly despicable, I think you'd use that as an opportunity to go after Tad again. And I would, gentleman that I am, open my arms and give you a quick no muss, no fuss divorce.
Krystal: Hmm. Well, aren't you just every shade of sentimental? Well, FYI, honey bunch -- Tad Martin is no way in my future as I can imagine it. And seeing you partying through all this ugly, sad mess has made up my mind in permanent ink -- I am never leaving you, hubby o' mine. Your punishment has just begun.
Tad: If you think I'm enjoying this, then you don't know me at all. Did you see the faces in there tonight? Jamie, J.R., Opal, my father, even Palmer. You made me feel sorry for him tonight, and that's a first. I'm going to carry those faces with me for the rest of my life.
Di: You think I won't?
Tad: I think you don't understand what you did. A miracle happened in this house, a miracle based on a lie, your lie -- your announcement that you were Dixie. Now that miracle's gone, and there's nothing left but pain, and that's about all that's left.
Di: And I did that?
Tad: You did that.
Di: Tad, I'm sorry. Oh, I am so, so sorry.
Tad: Sorry? Sorry doesn't begin to cut it, doesn't begin to take away the pain.
J.R.: You know, you're a hard man to track down -- dead or alive.
Ryan: Long time no see, J.R.
J.R.: What kind of dirt are you? I mean, what kind of filthy piece of human waste does what you did? You smash people's lives, you stage a whole lie, you take the love that people had for you and you shoved it -- you shoved it down their throats. You just don't get away with something like that, Lavery.
Ryan: You're right. I'm not getting away with anything.
J.R.: You know, you really aren't fit to live.
Ryan: And so I've been told.
J.R.: What kind of crap are you pulling? What are you pulling right now? All laid back, above it all. No, you can't shrug this off. Come on. Come on, jackass! Take me on!
Ryan: I'm not going to do this, J.R.
J.R.: Oh? Who gave you a vote?
Ryan: I was a jerk to you before I left.
J.R.: Before you left? You make it sound like it was a two-week vacation to the beach, that you spit on everyone who was dumb enough to care for you.
Ryan: You're right, I hurt a lot of people, and Greenlee got the worst of it, and all I can say is that I am sorry.
J.R.: No, no, no, no, no, no, you don't get to walk away. You don't get to deal out a few "sorrys" and split. That's not going to happen.
Ryan: Don't do this, J.R.
J.R.: What did you come back for?
Ryan: Why don't you just take a deep breath and have a seat and relax -- ugh!
[Ryan doubles over in pain when J.R. hits him in the belly.]
Ryan: I am not going to fight you.
Julia: Ok, big boys don't spill their guts. I know that from my father, from Noah, from Mateo, so I'll do all the talking. How many times did I pull a gun on you and threaten to blow your head off and all you did in return was offer to protect me? So I owe you, so if there's anything I can do --
Zach: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, you don't owe me anything. No one owes me anything. Get a hint and get out of my office.
Julia: Fine. Fine.
Kendall: Zach and his twisted, twisted secrets.
Greenlee: Kendall, calm down.
Kendall: I can't help it. He completely played me.
Greenlee: Well, let him stew in his own pig juice. Don't stress yourself out. Now, come on, sit down. It's not good for you to get so worked up.
Kendall: Oh. You know, every now and then I would see what I thought was a glimmer of a good guy. But then it turns out I was just seeing things. Zach proved he's nothing but a lying bastard. He's completely not worth trusting. You know what I mean. I wish you didnít.
Greenlee: Remember how I wanted Ryanís memorial service to be over? It was a picnic compared to what came after. I didn't tell him about you and the baby.
Kendall: Greenlee, whatever hit the fan, the baby, it's still his.
Greenlee: Yeah, and isn't that a kick in the head? I feel like such an idiot.
Kendall: You know, if I don't get to beat myself up, neither do you.
Greenlee: Well, look what I did, Kendall. I dragged you into this baby mess.
Kendall: Yeah, but you didn't drag me into this. I volunteered.
Greenlee: Because you wanted to give me something of Ryan, something to fill out my life, because Ryan was too good to die. He had to live on somehow, but now I know. He's just another lying, double-dealing waste with a baby on the way, a baby that I had to have because I was selfish. Well, no more. I'm done thinking about myself. From this minute on, Kendall, I'm only thinking about you.
Krystal: Open your ear flaps, you sorry excuse for a human being. I've got one man in my life that I care about. He's upstairs in his footsie pajamas in his crib asleep. And now I'm worried about him more than I ever was, because today I saw up close and ugly how much of an example you set for the people that live under your influence. So I am staying right here, parked right here, and I'm going to stick to you like a porcupine quill, and not for love and not for money, because I'm going to make darn sure that you don't mess up Little Aís life like you did your own son. So you just put on your crash helmet and pull down that visor, because I am taking you for the ride of your life.
Di: There's nothing left for me here. I'll get my things and go. Can you help him, Tad? Can you try and save J.R. from what I've done to him?
Tad: I don't know.
Ryan: J.R., why don't you go home and spend a little time with your son and just forget about me.
J.R.: No, you don't get to walk away, you son of a Ė
[Picking up a piece of wood, J.R. hits Ryan across the back of the legs, making his knees buckle.]
Ryan: Agh! Ugh!
Greenlee: Right now I need to think about you -- your needs and what's best for you. And I need you to be selfish and put yourself first. I know you can do it. I can't be selfish anymore. I've got to think about my best friend and the horrible position I've put you in.
Kendall: Ok, I get that "selfish" is the key word here, but I'm not quite sure what you're getting at.
Greenlee: Knowing everything you know today, I need you to think long and hard. Do you want to go through with this? Do you still want to give birth to Ryanís baby?
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Kendall (to Greenlee): What if Ryan finds out that I'm carrying his baby?
Di (to Zach): Are you trying to stir up more trouble?
Zach (to Di): Fakes and liars should stick together.
Tad (Babe): I did what I thought was right.
Babe (to Tad): And now you're desperate to keep J.R. from doing something wrong.
Jamie (to J.R.): You may have killed him.
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