All My Children Transcript Tuesday 5/17/05
Proofread by Gisele
Jamie: That's completely nuts. Drop it.
Babe: Your Aunt Phoebe, her connections, her money -- it could be a great life for you.
Jamie: And end us. That can't be what you really want, Babe.
Babe: I want you to have what you deserve.
Jamie: Damn it, Babe, do I have to name everything we went through to be together, to maybe have a shot at getting little Adam back some day?
Babe: You gave up your dream for me, a dream that I never even knew existed. Being a doctor -- that's your future.
Jamie: No, you're my future, my whole future, you and little Adam.
Babe: No, I'm not. I can't be.
Kendall: Ok. All right. What are you after?
J.R.: I'm glad that you asked. Clearer? No? Maybe I should translate.
[Kendall breaks away from J.R.ís kisses.]
Kendall: No, I want to hear it in English.
J.R.: Ok. I want to hear you say yes.
Kendall: To you or to Zach?
J.R.: To both.
[Knock on door]
Zach: It's open.
Maria: May I come in?
Zach: Of course you can.
Jack: Erica. Erica?
Erica? You --
Jack: Erica? No, no, no, no, no. Erica? Erica! Captain, you've got someone overboard! Erica, hang on, I'm coming!
Erica: Jack? Jack! Jackson, no! Jack? Jack, I didn't mean to make you -- oh.
Jack: Made you look.
Erica: Oh, how juvenile.
Jack: And I suppose your little trick was, what, sophisticated, mature?
Erica: Whatever. So I guess we're even.
Jack: Guess again.
Erica: I tossed the plant out the window. You?
Jack: I threw a deck chair over the rail.
Erica: You sounded terrified.
Jack: You were terrified.
Erica: Oh, don't even pretend --
Jack: No, no, no, now, you listen to me. This little trick of mine proved one thing. I know you better than anybody else, because I knew without any doubt that you would never, ever, ever jump overboard.
Erica: Well, I might if you keep this up.
Jack: On the other hand, you were quite sure I'd taken the plunge.
Erica: I was not.
Jack: Yes, you were, too. You were freaked out. You thought I was out there flailing in those dark waves, drowning trying to save you.
Erica: Well, I was worried -- a little.
Jack: A lot. Because you love me.
Erica: And you love me. So. What do we do now?
Jack: Well, the facts of this case are clear. Despite both sides presenting evidence to the contrary, we love each other. That makes the verdict quite clear. We're both doomed.
Babe: You got kicked out of college because of me.
Jamie: J.R. screwed me over.
Babe: Because of me. And you can't get into a college, and you can't find a better job, and we can't live in a nice apartment all because of me.
Jamie: We're fine, Babe. We're fine.
Babe: My mother n prison, where I should be, and because of me, my son is being raised in that Chandler mausoleum by J.R. and some strange woman. I have done enough damage to last 12 lifetimes, and I am sick of it.
Jamie: Why dig all this up? Nothing has changed for us from this morning except that Aunt Phoebe's sick joke of a will ticked me off.
Babe: Jamie, I really think you should consider this offer.
Jamie: You want to prove that Aunt Phoebe's right, that money is all that matters to you?
Babe: You know me better than that.
Jamie: Yeah, and you know me better, too. And I wouldn't kiss you off for any amount of money.
Babe: And I don't want to be with a man who's going to end up resenting me or even hating me, because I ruined his life. You have so much potential, Jamie. Please don't just throw away your aunt's offer.
Jamie: If I thought for a second Ė
Kendall: All right, flag on the play -- pushing.
J.R.: Can I help it if you make me crazy?
Kendall: Well, try.
J.R.: Isn't there an old expression about keeping the barn door closed?
Kendall: After you've gotten the milk for free? J.R., we promised we were just going to enjoy each other and sleep together, no strings.
J.R.: I don't see any strings. You see strings? I don't see strings.
Kendall: Ok, well, when you tell me what to do, it's more like a rope tied into a leash.
J.R.: Ok. What you off? Ok, you know what -- gear shift. I'll stop trying to be the man to make love to you, and I'll be your friend, only for a few minutes, but -- so get down with me, friend. How can I help?
Kendall: Take off.
J.R.: You need space?
Kendall: From you, definitely.
J.R.: Oh. What is this, is this rejection? The one man who only wants what's best for you, the man who would keep the barn door wide open? The man who turned down Ethanís offer to give me back Chandler Enterprises if I'd leave you alone?
Maria: Um, I feel like I owe you something.
Zach: No, you don't owe me anything.
Maria: You've been very honest with me, and I really want to repay that.
Zach: Do you want a drink or something?
Maria: Oh, God, no. Thank you, though. I've had enough for a lifetime or two.
Zach: You found Sam?
Maria: Yeah. Yeah, we did, with a little help.
Zach: I'm sorry I couldn't hold on to him at the airport.
Maria: No, are you kidding? You were so helpful with Maddie. It was -- thank you.
Zach: So they're ok?
Maria: Physically, yeah. We've got a lot of work, a lot of work.
Zach: Well, I wish I could help in some way.
Maria: Yeah, fortunately, Tad's been very supportive. That's been --
Zach: That's good, then. Good.
Maria: Um, there is --
Zach: Um --
Maria: There's, you know, something that you can do for us.
Zach: I'll do anything just as long as it doesn't involve Sam or Maddie. Those kids hate me.
Maria: Yeah, but you're not to blame for any of that, and that's one of the things that I wanted to tell you.
Zach: Why don't we just cut through this and just tell me what you came here to say? I've been expecting it. You came to say good-bye. And it's time -- it's past time that I got out of your lives forever, for Sam and for Maddie, and, you know, I should've done that a long time ago. When I saw Sam in jail, he was suffering. He was confused about his dad.
Maria: Yeah, but you did what you thought was right. You told him that his dad was a really good guy, that he was a hero.
Zach: Yeah, I screwed this all up, didn't I?
Maria: No, no, I -- it's not your fault. I let this happen.
Zach: And no one can get past this -- not you, Sam, Maddie, not while I'm here to keep the wounds open. That's the bottom line.
Maria: You're right, that is, but our family had problems long before you ever came to Pine Valley.
Zach: And I made it harder for you.
Maria: Sam and Maddie both knew that Edmund and I had hit some rough patches, and they knew -- you just ended up being the scapegoat.
Zach: Come on. Where's all that honesty you promised?
Maria: Really, the kids knew that Edmund and I were both changing, that my marriage was deteriorating. Blaming you -- that was just the easy way.
Zach: I deserved it.
Maria: No, no. I failed my marriage, and I failed my kids. I'm ashamed of myself, I'm ashamed of Edmund. But you -- I'm really proud of you.
Kendall: Ethan offered you Chandler Enterprises?
J.R.: Yeah. I get the family business back if I said "Sayonara, Kendall."
Kendall: But you refused the offer?
J.R.: I didn't like the deal points. I told him to stuff it. But you want to know what amazed me the most about this whole thing is the fact that he thought that if I took him up on the deal that he'd get you back that way.
Kendall: I told Ethan I would only marry him if he turned over all of Cambias to Zach, and he refused.
J.R.: So on Ethanís love scale, you're worth Chandler Enterprises, but all of Cambias is "no way"?
Kendall: Sounds like it.
J.R.: You see, the good news is, is that Ethan doesn't care if we slept together. I don't know, he thinks that I'm controlling you and that if I get out of the way, that you'll just jump right back into his bed.
Kendall: You aren't the roadblock to that.
Jack: Doomed to love each other, wedding or no wedding.
Erica: Kidnapping or no kidnapping.
Jack: But what action do we take for the long haul?
Erica: You could apologize.
Jack: So could you. You should.
Erica: You started it.
Jack: I did not start -- but I'm big enough to start this, ok? I apologize.
Erica: Well, you have to be more specific.
Jack: I apologize for the crack I made about you holding on to Maddie when she was a baby. Erica, that was not just a low blow, it was in the dirt.
Erica: That was way over the line. That was horrible.
Jack: Yeah, that's why -- it was, and that's why I'm apologizing. I'm very, very sorry I ever said that.
Erica: And you should be. Apology accepted.
Jack: Thank you. The "sorry" ball's in your court.
Erica: I'm sorry about Zach. I never should have tried to get him to marry me, but I was desperate to save Kendall. And I wanted to get back at you, and I regret it.
Jack: You mean you're sorry?
Erica: Yes, I'm sorry. Your need to hear those words is so petty.
Jack: I know what that cost you. Apology accepted.
Jack: Yeah, go ahead. Anytime.
Erica: It's your turn.
Jack: I don't have anything else to apologize for.
Erica: Well, you're either kidding or you have a severe memory problem. You have nothing else to apologize for? Allow me to fill you in. Greenlee and Ryan, meddling in their marriage?
Jack: I am not going to apologize for caring about my daughter.
Erica: And I'm not going to apologize for caring about mine.
Erica: Fine. Oh, God. Maybe Kendall was right.
Jack: About what? What did Kendall say?
Erica: Our children are mostly grown up, so they should be allowed to screw up.
Jack: Like us.
Erica: Exactly like us.
Jack: Well you know what, she may have a point. I mean, really, what have we accomplished in all this but driving each other crazy?
Erica: Exactly. Wow. We haven't been very smart about this, have we?
Jack: I'll go so far as to say we've been downright dumb. You know what they say -- "Don't ever try to teach a pig to sing. You'll only waste your time and --"
Both: "Irritate the pig."
Jack: Exactly. So from here on out, Greenlee's and Kendall's lives are their own.
Erica: And our lives are our own?
Jack: Yeah, we just stay out of it. Right?
Erica: It's too simple. It'll never work
Kendall: I thought Ethan knew me.
J.R.: Look I don't want you worrying about Ethan giving me Chandler Enterprises. What fun would that be? I want to take it from him. I want to pry his greedy fingers off it, hit him when he least expects it, get Chandler back with your help, not as trade for you. Wow. You know, you need to really relax. These knots -- you're going to go into spasm if you're not careful.
Kendall: I'll be fine.
J.R.: There's no doubt about that. You're the strongest woman I've ever known. Spectacular.
Kendall: No, J.R.
J.R.: Yes, you are.
Kendall: No, I mean stop. My life is complicated enough.
J.R.: I'm here to reduce the stress, not add to it.
Kendall: All right, well, then level with me. Are you falling for me
J.R. , I guess there is no use in denying it. I have fallen madly, head-over-heels, crazily in lust with you. In fact, thinking our previous encounter makes me incredibly hot. But as far as love? That's for the naÔve and the mentally challenged, and I thought that we agreed that love is for suckers.
Kendall: Yeah. So Ethan doesn't -- he didn't care that I slept with you?
J.R.: Ethan will forgive you like that, if he hasn't already.
Kendall: But he won't forgive me if I marry Zach.
J.R.: Will Ethan forgive you, will he not -- why do you even care?
Zach: I made plenty of mistakes. You didn't get yourself here on your own.
Maria: No, but it's too bad I'm the only one who can get myself out.
Zach: Yeah, it's too bad.
Maria: And you, you're so damned honorable.
Zach: Oh. That's what you think, huh?
Maria: Yeah, well, you have your own strange kind of code of honor, you stick to it, so I appreciate all that you are.
Zach: You have very peculiar tastes. I'll just keep that our little secret.
Maria: Why are we always saying good-bye, for God's sake? This is like good-bye deja vu. And every time, it just -- it hurts more, I mean, than the last time. At the hospital when I found out that you and Kendall were thinking about getting married --
Zach: It's not -- there's not --
Maria: No, na, la, la, la. You know what, I don't want to hear it. It's none of my business. I don't want to know. So whatever's between you and Kendallís just -- she's very lucky, ok? She's a lucky girl.
Zach: But don't think that it's -- it's not the same.
Maria: You know what, actually, this is not really deja vu because it's Ė it's sort of different this time. I mean, because we're not saying goodbye because of Edmund or you or me. I have to focus on my kids. I have to fight for my kids right now. Maddie and Sam have got to come before anything else.
Jamie: I took what you said seriously. I had to ride a while and consider everything. I made a decision. I don't if you really going to like it, it's the only to go. Get the idea?
Jamie: Screw the money. It means nothing. But you --
Babe: I thought for a second you'd listened to me.
Jamie: Oh, I listened. But I could never follow through with something that meant living without you.
Babe: And you're sure? You're sure this is the right thing to do, the right thing for you?
Jamie: Hey, I don't have a choice. Don't you get that? We have to keep on like we are -- together. The only reason I walked out was because I was so damn mad at J.R. and Aunt Phoebe for giving him a new way to get us.
Babe: Hey, she loved you very much.
Jamie: She picked the wrong way to show it. I'm sorry she hurt you. It was cruel.
Babe: Maybe if I had a chance to get to know her, things could've been different.
Jamie: Once Aunt Phoebe made her mind up about something, even if she was dead wrong, it was pretty hard to change it. But I'm sure you would've given her a run for her money.
Babe: It's just everything that she wrote to be read at the funeral -- it was all so fun.
Jamie: Yeah, 50 years after the fact. That's how long it took for Aunt Phoebe to accept an apology or give one. Even then, she nursed a grudge.
Babe: Maybe if she just would've known how much I loved you --
Jamie: Maybe in another 50 years. Aunt Phoebe was Mainline, old Philadelphia money. She could get her nose so high up in the air, it was --
Babe: And look at you. You just settled down with common trash. Shame on you.
Jamie: You're amazing. You know the only thing that Aunt Phoebe did accomplish?
Babe: She made the reading of her will one of J.R.ís all-time high points?
Jamie: She made me love you more than I did before. Who knew that was possible?
Babe: No, you don't.
Jamie: You put me first. You wanted me to seriously consider Aunt Phoebe's offer, knowing that I'd have to walk out on you. What kind of woman does that?
Babe: Just the softheaded ones, I guess.
Jamie: No. Just the ones that no man should ever let go.
Kendall: You brought up my price tag with Ethanís marketplace. I'm worth Chandler, not worth Cambias. But commodities, they don't have a heart or a soul or a breaking point. Ethan does.
J.R.: And that's what you want?
Kendall: Well, if I say "I do" to Zach --
J.R.: You marry Zach, Ethanís skewered.
Kendall: Yeah. Yeah, that -- that is the end with Ethan.
J.R.: But you still haven't decided to go through with it. What's the downside?
Kendall: I'm a sucker. Ethan has done horrible and stupid things.
J.R.: He so doesn't deserve you.
Kendall: Yeah, but, J.R., maybe I went too far with this whole ultimatum thing. I mean, maybe I put expectations on him that he can't possibly meet.
J.R.: What are you supposed to do? You supposed to lower your expectations?
Kendall: No, you don't understand. Ethan loved me and accepted me when I never thought I could love again.
J.R.: He was willing to trade you like stock. That's love?
Kendall: I can't just have everything my way. I mean, I can't decide who people should be and then freak out if they're not that person. I did that with Ryan, and now I'm losing Ethan because of it.
J.R.: Look, Ethan blew it, ok? He's the one that blew it. Just stop adding knots. Take care of yourself for a change.
Kendall: Ow! That hurt.
J.R.: Well, just breathe through it, let go of some of that tension before that perfect little head of yours explodes. Is that better?
Kendall: Yes. Hmm.
J.R.: Hey, wait a minute. Who are you calling?
Kendall: Ethan. The bottom line is I love him.
Erica: We can't swear off interference completely. I mean, look at the family we're trying to put together -- you and me and Greenlee and Kendall and Lily and Reggie and Bianca and Miranda.
Jack: An active and unpredictable lot, I'll grant you that, but remember, we're only declaring hands off on the older kids. Lily, Reggie -- they're not off the hook yet.
Erica: Only Lily and Reggie?
Jack: Honey, if we want to survive, we need to let these kids find their own way.
Erica: Yeah, but Kendall can't marry Zach.
Jack: Hey, hey, hey, you'll stay out of it.
Erica: And what about Ryan and Greenlee?
Jack: If something like that happens, of course I'm going to have to step in. That's different.
Erica: You will not! You'll do nothing!
Jack: I was just kidding.
Erica: Were not. Ok, I'll put it to you this way. Let's just say that Ryan and Greenlee do split up, and Greenlee decides to spin off with Ethan.
Jack: Stop. Stop this, please, enough. You're driving me absolutely crazy.
Erica: Well, only because you are the most frustrating man in the whole wide world, and what frustrates me most about you is what I love most about you.
Jack: Well, then you're in trouble, aren't you?
Erica: Oh, tell me about it. You don't do what I tell you. You're your own man. And I happen to love you for it, but the fact that you enjoy it so much -- that makes me so mad at you, I could just -- hmm.
Jack: Why don't you concentrate on the loving-me part, huh?
Erica: I do. I know that you're there when I need you, and you're very strong, you're very dependable. And you don't let me boss you around.
Jack: Boy, you said that last through gritted teeth.
Erica: Did not.
Jack: Did, too. You know, you're pretty exasperating yourself, lady. You can charm anything that breathes when you're in the mood. However, your moods are so damn changeable, nobody knows what to expect or when to dodge the fireworks. I can't tell you the number of times I've wanted to wring your neck, but I have a feeling that only Lily can count that high.
Erica: Ok, will you please get to the loving part, tell me how wonderful I am?
Jack: Oh, you are wonderful. You are a rare and beautiful creature. You're passionate, you're intelligent, and you deserve the finest things that life has to offer.
Erica: There. I knew we could finally agree on something.
Jack: Oh. As irritating as you can be -- and you can be irritating -- I got to tell you, I am proud, I'm flattered that you want to share a life with me. Because I love the fireworks when they're yours. And Lord knows you do make my life exciting.
Erica: And I don't even have to try.
Jack: So, we agree? No more interfering?
Erica: No more interfering with our adult children.
Jack: That's right. I also want to tell you how sorry I am for everything I said or did that caused you pain or unhappiness.
Erica: Oh, Jack, so am I. Oh, Jack. Did we really just settle that?
Jack: Yeah, yeah, I believe we have. Mmm, mmm -- oh, you know, there is maybe one more thing we should take care of.
Erica: No, Jack! Jack, we were finished. We were in each other's arms. But do you move forward? Do you even savor the moment? No, no, you have to dredge up one more thing to cause trouble. Now who's driving who crazy?
Jack: That's "whom," I think. "Who's driving whom crazy."
Erica: Oh, don't make me kill you.
Maria: I should get going.
Zach: Wait a second. I'm sorry, about everything. I'm sorry how this ended.
Maria: It's funny. It's all in the timing, I guess.
Zach: Or lack of it.
Maria: Yeah. I'm really -- I'm really grateful for every single minute. Thank you for loving me, Zach.
Zach: Didn't really have a choice.
Maria: Well, few women ever get a chance to be loved like that, even once in a lifetime, much less twice, and it certainly changes you. I would know from experience. I want you to know that I loved you so deeply and completely. I loved you with everything that I had and everything that I had to give.
Zach: I know.
Maria: Ok. Ahem. Would you mind? May I kiss you good-bye, please?
J.R.: I am trying to relieve the stress, remember, so stop swinging from one extreme to the other.
Kendall: Listen to me, ok? This isn't some whim, J.R. I have to take action. I'm stuck in this "my way or the highway" cycle, and if I don't stop, my relationships won't have a chance.
J.R.: And Ethanís not partly responsible for that? Ethan doesn't give a damn about you. All he wanted was revenge on his father, and maybe that's still in play.
Kendall: Well, of course it is. He's still angry with Zach.
J.R.: No, what I meant -- you know, forget it.
Kendall: Well, come on, it's not like you to hold back.
J.R.: I can't help it. How important do you think this would be to Ethan if Zachís offer wasn't on the table? I guess we'll never find out, huh? I do know one thing -- that's it's late in the evening, and you're in no position to be making any rational decisions. These muscles don't lie.
Kendall: All right, yes, I am exhausted, but I'm --
J.R.: But Ethan will be there tomorrow, and Zachís not going anywhere, either. Take care of yourself. Sleep on it, and whatever decision you want to make in the morning, go for it.
Kendall: I just want to be happy, you know?
J.R.: And I'm behind that. And if this is what's going to make that, then maybe I should get out of the way.
Kendall: What am I going to do with you?
J.R.: Oh, the ways I could answer that question.
Kendall: No, I'm serious here. You -- you remind me, like, I'm back in high school, and you're the new bad boy in class.
J.R.: I'm bad?
Kendall: Yeah, don't pretend. You're very bad. You're very bad for me.
J.R.: Oh, that hurts me, Kendall.
Kendall: Don't lie. I've hung out with the bad boy before, and I should just run, but --
J.R.: I'm irresistible?
Kendall: Yeah, you are, but you're also very dangerous, and I know it. But I can't help it, I just -- I feel comfortable with you. I feel like I can tell you anything.
J.R.: And you can. And you can do anything with me, which you pretty much already have.
Kendall: Yes, I have. And I enjoyed every nasty, wild minute of it.
J.R.: So it sounds like the bad boy is also the good boy?
Kendall: You can be. I can get lost in you for hours.
J.R.: Well, I'm glad to be of service. Anything that you want, I'm here for you, and anything that you don't want, well, that is your decision, too.
Erica: Why don't you just make a list, Jackson -- all the "one last things" that could possibly crop up to give us trouble. Just give it to me in the morning, ok, because I am so sick and tired of thinking that we have put all our problems to bed, and then you think of something else.
Jack: You're right. You're right. Let's put our last things aside, and we'll deal with them, you know, later. Right now, let's put ourselves to bed. What do you say? All in favor, say "aye"? Aye.
Jack: Great. More of that wonderful agreement.
[After enjoying lingering tender kisses from Zach, Maria cries and tries for more, but he pushes her away.]
Jamie: J.R. can't stop us, can't kill our dreams. So we're not rolling in cash. I mean, your mom had to scrimp along, right?
Babe: Scrimping would've been high living for us.
Jamie: Krystal made it fun.
Babe: I always had fun growing up. But then again, I wasn't living in the Chandler crosshairs with J.R. after me and -- hey, you're not playing fair.
Jamie: I'm not playing. I love you, Babe. J.R. can't change it, Aunt Phoebe can't buy it. It's yours.
Erica: Ok. Ok, I guess I can take it now. What was that one last thing you had on your mind that you wanted to tell me before you allowed me to distract you?
Jack: Ok, ok. But you have to promise me -- no temper, no fireworks.
Erica: My goodness, Jack, what is it?
Jack: Erica, will you marry me?
Babe: Dr. Jamie Martin. What could sound better than that?
Jamie: Mrs. Babe Martin. That's much better.
[Lying in bed next to J.R., Kendall remembers.]
Zachís voice: You and Ethan, you could have a future together, maybe even a happy one, but only if you walk away from me.
J.R.ís voice: So on Ethanís love scale, you're worth Chandler Enterprises, but all of Cambias is "no way"?
Kendall's voice: Ethan has done horrible and stupid things. The bottom line is I love him.
Ethan's voice: This isn't a dream. It's real. And we are going to have the most perfect and wonderful life together.
[Ethan knocks on someone's door.]
Ethan: I know. Last person you expected to see? I need your help. I won't lose Kendall.
[Knock on door]
Zach: What happened? You all right?
Kendall: Yeah, yeah, I'm fine now because I have the answer to your marriage proposal.
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Lily (to Adrian): I'm here to see my boyfriend, and it's not you.
Kendall: You still planning on going through with --
Ryan: Yes. Keep your mouth shut, not one word to Greenlee.
Erica: Jack, our wedding, it has to be here.
Tony Danes: It is our pleasure to give you the wedding of your dreams.
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