AMC Transcript Tuesday 1/11/05

All My Children Transcript Tuesday 1/11/05

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By Boo
Proofread by Gisele

Kendall: So, welcome to phase three of "You can be anyone you want to be."

Ethan: A lambada dancer? Sorry, I don't think I can do that.

Kendall: Oh, Ethan, you don't have to put on a floorshow. We can hunker down in a private corner and move to our own rhythm.

Ethan: Kendall, I can't do this. Look, the longer it gets, the more difficult it's getting, you know?

Kendall: Ok, well, listen, the wait will be over soon. In the meantime, choose your nervous-energy burn, and I'll be right there with you. I'm not going to let you go through this alone.

Ethan: I just feel like I could destroy something right now. I mean, I could just punch my fist in someone's face, if the right face were to come along.

Krystal: We got to talk.

Tad: Well, look who got sprung. How'd you make bail, or do I want to know?

Krystal: Adam made it happen.

Tad: With a few conditions, I'm sure.

Krystal: Let's just put it this way -- we got trouble.

Tad: No, you got trouble. If he's coming after you and David after everything you've done, more power to him.

Krystal: Adam and J.R. know about baby James.

J.R.: The tall one, dumb as dirt, put him on.

Sister Fatima: The man wants to talk to you.

J.R.: Yo, James. My brother, are you there?

Jamie: I'm here.

J.R.: Guess what, buddy -- you and Babe are so dead. I know that you have my son. Game over for you and Babe, payback time for me. Now, put my PI back on the phone.

Jamie: J.R. knows.

Sister Fatima: What next, Mr. Chandler?

J.R.: Call the cops, tell them that these two losers are the ones that are wanted for kidnapping. Call me the second that they're in custody, and don't take your eyes off my son.

Sister Fatima: It'll go down just the way you say, Mr. Chandler. Told you this day was going to have a bad end. Tea leaves never lie.

Liza: Glory be. Jinx Parminter? Louisiana State! Go, go, go!

Sister Fatima: Let me up, bitch!

Liza: Somebody please help this poor woman!

J.R.: Prep the jet. File a flight plan for New Orleans. I'll meet you on the tarmac.

Adam: Quick work. Congratulations. Feels good, doesn't it?

J.R.: This minute, police cruisers screaming down the French quarter. And within the hour, Babe and Jamie will be in custody, huddling in a holding cell, waiting extradition. It's time to bring my son home.

Adam: There's nothing stopping you.

J.R.: It's been 10 months. My son has to be so big by now. He's probably crawling, pulling himself up out of the crib, shaking and jumping up and down, wanting his -- I'll be damned if my son ever calls Jamie "Daddy."

Adam: Oh, son, when you were a boy and you used to spend time with Tad, I used to worry about that. Tad, the card, the comic, kidding his way into your life, claiming it. I was terrified that you would be more his son than mine. But that fear was unfounded because you are my son, by birth, by blood, in every way that counts. And it's going to be exactly the same way with you and your boy. Mark my words.

J.R.: There's only one difference. I'll never betray my son.

Tad: Bianca told J.R. about his son?

Krystal: No. At least I don't think so.

Tad: Then why are you here sounding the alarm?

Krystal: Adam bailed me out of jail to fish for info.

Tad: About Jamie and Babe?

Krystal: Yeah. He did his evil best just to try to trick me into saying that they were off with his grandbaby.

Tad: You're right, he knows something.

Krystal: Yeah, I kept telling him that his grandbaby died at that river 10 months ago.

Tad: After all the lies you told about Bess, he's not going to believe a word you say.

Krystal: I didn't give anything away, ok, but I don't think I threw him off track, either.

Tad: This is great. This is just fantastic.

Krystal: Tad, listen to me, isn't there a way we can reach them --

Tad: No.

Krystal: And warn them that there's trouble on their tail?

Tad: Listen to me, it's not safe. The best thing to do is just cut off communication altogether.

Krystal: Can't we anonymously send them some money? I'm broke, but David's loaded.

Tad: Who cares? You think David's money is some kind of magic carpet? It's not about money. If it was, Brooke and I would be up to our necks in hock right now.

Krystal: I know that, I know.

Tad: Money's not going to do any good. The fact is there isn't one town left on this entire planet that's going to be safe because if they know about that baby, if they've got the old Chandler blood in their nostrils, J.R. and Adam will hunt our children to the moon and back. For all I know, J.R.'s on the phone with some kind of bounty hunter from hell right now telling him to bring back his son no matter what and just do whatever he wants to Jamie and Babe.

Krystal: Tad, you're scaring me now.

Tad: Well, guess what -- join the club. Try "terrified" on for size. Try sitting up every single night in the same chair, afraid to go to sleep because every time I do, I have the same nightmare over and over and over again. And it's always the same. It never changes. The kids and the baby, sitting around a kitchen table, laughing, looking like the perfect family. Then all of a sudden, the lights go out and -- boom -- J.R.'s standing right there. I'm trying to do whatever I can to help the kids, to get between them and J.R., but I can't move. It's like I'm stuck in place and they can't hear me screaming for them to run. I just watch paralyzed while J.R. grabs the baby with one hand and a pipe with the other, smashes it down on Jamie's head over and over again. Night after night, always the same thing -- just me watching. Oh, wait a minute. Here. Do yourself a favor -- get a second one, make it a double.

Kendall: Ethan took the DNA test, and if they get the results tonight, they're going to messenger them here.

Greenlee: All righty, then. Enjoy your evening.

Kendall: Want to hang out?

Ethan: Well, it's either that or have them deliver the results by bungee cord, so -- Kendall? What's wrong?

Kendall: It's her.

Greenlee: Honey, order my usual. I'll be back.

Ryan: Ok.

Kendall: Give me one good reason why you're still alive. What idiot judge let you out of jail? You let him cop a feel in chambers in exchange for a free pass?

Krystal: My bail got posted.

Kendall: Oh, someone saved your sorry butt. Proof that what you put out there doesn't always come back to bite you. So here you are, free as a bird, sucking down your scotch. Choke on it. People like you should be dead, but for whatever reason go on living, rubbing all of our faces in it.

Krystal: Give me your best shot, Kendall. Lord knows I deserve it.

Greenlee: She doesn't need your permission to unload.

Kendall: But I am curious. I am dying to know what it's like to be you right now in this very moment. Do you look at your face in the mirror, flash yourself that little half-smile, saying, "I got away with it -- yes, ma'am, I got away with murder"? Because that's what you are. You're a baby killer. You let my sister believe that her baby was dead. That dirt that we shoveled at the Miranda Center? We should've been digging for your grave. But here you are. You're breathing free air and enjoying the nightlife when you should be on death row.

Krystal: My judgment day will come sooner or later.

Kendall: Yeah, well, sooner's got my vote.

Greenlee: Mine, too.

Kendall: You want to hear my favorite fantasy? It's me sitting ringside when you get the needle -- the one that sends you straight to hell. I need to see you suffer the way that you made my sister suffer.

Krystal: Kendall, you have every right to be upset with me. You have every right to hate me.

Kendall: Ok, for you to pretend that you understand anything that I'm going through is nothing but an insult. It's exactly what I would expect from you.

Greenlee: Uh-uh. You don't get to walk away. You stay and you hear Kendall out, and then when she's done, I'll get started.

Kendall: So, where's your precious baby doll now?

Krystal: I don't know. But you can't blame her for this.

Kendall: Oh, how does that work exactly? See, Babe knew the child that she was feeding and diapering and passing off as her own was Bianca's. Spare me her guilt pains and her secret suffering and all the tears that she supposedly cried. Babe was part of this whole nasty cover-up, so how does that make her blame-free?

Krystal: She got caught up in Paul Cramer's lie.

Kendall: Yeah, well, she had a zillion chances to get uncaught and do right by Bianca and that innocent baby. But she chose her own piggy, selfish needs over a mother's right to love her own child. I guess she was absent the day they taught about right and wrong, huh?

Greenlee: Yeah, I'm sure the subject never came up at Krystal's home school. Lying and cheating are her best subjects. The difference between right and wrong never made the curriculum.

David: All right, that's enough. Ease up on Krystal.

Greenlee: Don't you dare tell me to ease up, David.

David: Greenlee, you don't know the whole story.

Greenlee: I know you had the chance to give Bianca her baby back, but you just let her suffer.

Bobby: Yeah, it's time for another payment. 30,000, same drop, boathouse tomorrow morning. Oh, well, I'm really sorry to hear that because as we speak, I got Ryan Lavery in my line of sight and -- you're really going to love this -- guess who's with him. Yeah, Ethan Ramsey. The dude who took a bullet in the gut hanging out with the guy who got arrested for shooting him. Maybe I should join the party, tell him whose finger was really on the trigger? Excellent, excellent. Yeah, as long as we're on the same page, huh?

Adam: Let's concentrate on the positive, son. To Adam Chandler, III, and to his speedy return home. Oh, Martin! You're about as welcome as the plague.

J.R.: That's true, but his timing's right on the money. The jet's not ready. We were just celebrating the return of my son. Turns out he didn't die in a chopper crash. He's with his kidnappers, Babe and Jamie. Oh, don't panic. One of my operatives ran them down. They should be posing for their mug shots right about now. I just dropped a bomb, you didn't blink. Did you know about my son?

Tad: Yeah. I knew.

J.R.: You knew my baby survived and you still kept it from me?

Tad: Yes.

J.R.: Don't you think that I deserved to know? How can you justify keeping that from me? How could you give my son to my brother? Do you honestly hate me that much?

Tad: No, I don't hate you. I'm afraid of you. I'm afraid for you.

J.R.: Get out of my house.

Tad: I saw the blood on the pipe you used to beat your brother within an inch of his life. I watched Bianca fight for her life while you held on to her daughter and refused to give her up. So I had to ask myself, "What would Dixie want for her grandson?" The answer was easy. She wouldn't want you to raise that boy.

J.R.: Don't talk about my mother! Don't pretend to think that you know what she'd want for me! She loved me! She'd want me to have my child!

Adam: Son, let it go! Forget Tad! He's as bad as the worst of them. He's beneath contempt.

Greenlee: Have you forgotten Leo? Have you?

David: Of course not.

Greenlee: Your brother loved you and Bianca. He was her best friend.

David: I know that.

Greenlee: Leo believed in you, David. You were supposed to watch over Bianca, but you didn't. You passed her over for Babe. You let Bianca down. You let Leo down. Feel that? It's Leo's heart breaking.

Kendall: I don't get you. You protected Bianca all throughout her pregnancy. You helped me help her. I trusted you. She trusted you.

David: We should go.

Ryan: No, actually, you're going to come with me.

Ethan: Hold on a second, I want in on this one.

Ryan: I lead, you learn.

Krystal: David?

David: Order me a scotch. I'll be right back.

Ryan: Save your money, Krystal!

Krystal: What are they going to do to him?

Greenlee: Forget David. What are we going to do to you?

David: All right! All right, look at me, look at me, I'm shaking, I'm trembling. So, what, is this the part where you muscle-heads beat me to a pulp and leave me for dead?

Ryan: Could be.

Jamie: Linda Crane. L.C. -- "Liza Colby." This is it.

Liza: Come in, come in, come in. I was starting to get a little worried.

Jamie: Well, we took the back way up and then took the scenic route to make sure no one followed us.

Liza: Yeah, well, thank God for your dominant PI genes. I saw you grab the gun.

Jamie: I tossed it in the river. I didn't want it anywhere around the baby.

Liza: I don't blame you. It's so good to see someone from home.

Jamie: Tell me about it. I nearly flatlined when you showed up.

Babe: It was like a miracle. One minute we're staring down the barrel of a gun, and then --

Jamie: Then the next, you swooped in and saved the day, and not, I think, by a coincidence.

Liza: Well, Tad told me what was going on. I was supposed to stay low, but I knew there was some heat, so I took a walk in your quarter.

Babe: Lucky for us.

Liza: Well, luck and timing. Tad thumbnailed it all for me. Before I hear the whole story, I would very much like to be introduced to this handsome man. Who is this?

Babe: This is my son.

Liza: Yours and J.R.?

Babe: J.R.'s his biological daddy, but Jamie's his daddy in every way that counts.

Liza: So what's his name?

Babe: James. Our sweet baby James.

J.R.: Your son is going to have a long stretch behind bars. I'm hoping for a life sentence and an unmarked grave behind the prison cemetery. That to me is sweet victory.

Tad: J.R., no matter how angry you are, he's still your brother.

J.R.: No, we used to hang out together, but there is no blood that ties. Isn't that funny, just like you and me. You called me "son" because it made my mom happy and made my father nuts. But you dropped me fast when you chose Jamie over me.

Tad: That's not true. I don't care what's happened, I don't care what's been said, I have always loved you like a son and I always will.

J.R.: You made that sound so easy. Here, let me try. I love you like a dad. No, no. Actually, it just -- just leaves a bad aftertaste in the mouth.

[Phone rings]

J.R.: So how about we leave it with "as dead to me"? Tell me they're handcuffed in the back of a patrol car. They what?

Adam: Son, what's wrong?

J.R.: Some crazy lady created a diversion. Babe and Jamie got away with my son! What did she look like? Fair-skinned, blonde hair, late 30s. Listen to me, mobilize all your units, shut down that city till you find them!

Adam: Son --

J.R.: Damn it, it was this close.

Adam: The woman running interference --

J.R.: The PI took a photo on her cell cam, emailed it.

Adam: Liza! Yes!

Greenlee: They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but I doubt Bianca can wring much comfort in that. And she's not the only walking wounded. The numbers are still coming in, but here's your casualty list to date. Erica, Bianca's mother. Your lie trashed her sobriety. Kendall. Your lie broke her mind, her spirit. Your lie gave Reggie a close-up view of life's ugly side, meaner than anything he'd seen on the streets where he grew up. And when my dad laid eyes on that smashed incubator, that box that was just full of life just hours before, he broke down. He lost that child, he lost Erica. Because of your lie, everyone lost. Everyone except you and David and Babe. Oh, you survive, you go on, but my family may never recover.

Kendall: My sister will never get back the time that she lost with her daughter. I used to stress about how devoted Bianca was to Bess. I thought it was unnatural. But what's more natural than a mother knowing her own child? But Babe kept the baby, and Bianca went home empty-handed. You ever wonder how many nights she cried herself to sleep?

Krystal: I -- I can't even imagine.

Kendall: Well, you're going to imagine it right now. Imagine your daughter -- imagine your daughter had been brutally raped and imagine she was pregnant with her rapist's baby. But she came to see that child as her salvation, a chance to turn the worst night of her life into something beautiful. That child was her hope and her salvation. And then she was snatched away. Can you imagine? Can you imagine that horror for your precious Babe? Can you imagine the hatred that you would feel for the person who kept -- who kept her from her baby? You would want that person locked up in the coldest, meanest, nastiest prison on the face of this earth, and that is where I hope you go, and soon, so that Bianca will never have to see your lying, stupid face again!

Ryan: Well, if you have something to say, Hayward, now would be the time to say it.

Ethan: You don't have anything to say to him? You can talk to me. You remember back in October? Bianca was talking to you about a DNA test she wanted done on the birth shirt. Yeah. You, ever mindful of her feelings, advised her that if she had the sample taken from the shirt, it would destroy the shirt, the last physical link Bianca had to that baby. That meant a big loss to Bianca, but she was willing to make that sacrifice. And you -- you just stood back and you pretended to care. You watched her go through agony. You knew that that shirt -- that wasn't the last of piece of her little baby. You knew that her little baby was alive and she was well and she was living with your daughter. What kind of man are you? What kind of man are you that stands by, who allows that suffering to continue when you could have stopped it in a second? I swear, I could choke the life out of you and God himself would call it justice right now!

Ryan: Ethan, you're already up for one attempted murder charge. You don't need to rack up another one.

Ethan: Who says this one isn't going to succeed, eh?

Ryan: I do, actually. You see, he and I go way back. Way back. Don't we, Hayward?

Babe: Now that J.R. knows he has a child in this world, nothing's going to stop him from hunting us down.

Liza: J.R. can knock himself out. It's not going to work. I mean, all the Chandler clout and cash in the world, and Adam hasn't picked up my scent.

Babe: But today was just way too close. It was like all the nightmares I've been having -- that J.R. finds James, and he takes him from me and I never get to see him again.

Jamie: Babe, it's not going to happen. I won't let it. We have our camouflage, our new IDs, and we can get at least 500 miles before dawn, so --

Liza: No, no, no, wait, wait. I have a way of contacting Tad. He can give me more info on his end and tell me what J.R.'s next move will be.

Adam: Liza and Colby in New Orleans. What are the odds? Let's have another toast, son, to both of us getting our children back.

J.R.: While I'm onboard with that, I got other things I have to take care of. Just cancel the jet.

Adam: Later, but I'm going to go and call in every favor out there to bring Colby and your baby boy back here.

J.R.: You know, in a perfect world, we'd never see each other again. But if we have the unfortunate luck of running into each other, keep walking. I'll do the same.

Tad: J.R., it doesn't have to be like this.

J.R.: You're the one that kept my son from me, and for that I'll never forgive you.

Tad: You think that was easy for me? You think I enjoyed doing it? I kept looking for something in you, looking for someone -- your mother. If I saw even one shred, one spark of Dixie's generosity, of her kindness, of her forgiveness, I would've put her grandchild in your arms personally. But it's not there anymore. In its place is something cold and cruel, exactly like Adam.

J.R.: I'd rather be like Adam than you.

Adam: Hey, I'm not done with you yet, Martin.

David: Go right ahead. Accuse me all you want, posture. Threaten me until those worthless brains of yours shrivel up and fall out. But you will never get me to apologize for putting my daughter at the head of the line.

Ryan: First, do no harm. That's for suckers, right, Doc? Because you do harm. You do evil. You kept Bianca's baby from her for the same reason that you do everything else -- to stoke your own damn ego. You smash and grab whatever you want, leave some poor innocent slob with the check. And if somebody gets hurt, who cares, because it's not your problem.

David: Hey, in the end, we're all responsible for our own actions, aren't we, Ryan?

Ryan: Oh. So when you blackmailed Gillian into sleeping with you, that was her fault? And when you broke up the entire Martin clan because you wanted Dixie, their fault, not yours? And when you drugged an entire boatload of people because you wanted Tad to cheat on Dixie, whose fault if not yours?

Ethan: He really did all that?

Ryan: You know what, but there was a moment -- there was a moment when I thought the doc here redeemed himself. It was right after Michael Cambias was murdered, and you turned suspicion onto yourself to protect all the Kane women.

David: Yep.

Ryan: But then you crucified Bianca to be Krystal and Babe's hero. You all deserve each other.

David: You know, it's funny, you bringing up Gillian. Did you ever know what she really liked, Ryan? Because when I could make her close her eyes, I could get her to make sounds like -- oh!

Greenlee: You know, it's too bad we can't publicly brand you for what you are so people can jump clear of you when they see you coming.

Kendall: Oh, there must be some way to get the message out there.

Greenlee: Posters of Krystal with a banned sign on her face.

Kendall: Or a skull and crossbones.

Greenlee: We could start a wicked whisper campaign.

Kendall: Why whisper? We can just shout it out. Hey, can you guys kill the music?

Greenlee: You're wanted on the dance floor.

[Music stops]

Kendall: Oh, don't even try to fight it.

Greenlee: This on? Ahem. Your attention, everyone. We have a very urgent public service announcement.

Kendall: I'm sure you all have heard of my sister, Bianca Montgomery. She founded the Miranda Montgomery Center in honor of her child, the baby that she thought had died. Only her baby didn't die. She was stolen by this woman. Her name is Krystal Carey. She is a liar, a thief, and a predator.

Greenlee: So if you see her at the supermarket check-out line, know she's a predator. If you sit next to her on the bus or at the movies, know she's a predator. And if your children see her on the street, tell them to run home and lock their doors.

Kendall: Whatever you do, don't let her in. Don't let her anywhere near you. Do not let this woman destroy your family the way she tried to destroy ours.

Adam: Nice try, Martin. You wanted to follow J.R. so you could telegraph his next move to Liza and Babe.

Tad: Oh, gee. Outsmarted again.

Adam: Yeah, it must really gall you to know that all of your efforts to protect my ex-wife have come to naught.

Tad: Remind me again, what exactly is "naught"?

Adam: It's just a matter of time before Colby is rounded up along with my grandson.

Tad: You'll have to catch them first.

Adam: Oh, Liza can't run far enough or fast enough.

Tad: She doesn't need to run. All she's got to do is hire herself a voodoo priestess, have a waxwork doll made of you, and start sticking pins in all the naughty bits.

Adam: Oh, well, that's too bad. All the black magic doesn't seem to be working, because I've never felt more fit in my life. I have so much to look forward to, such as you suffering, and I will live to see that.

Tad: Don't forget the matinée on Saturday.

Adam: Oh, that's cute -- another piece of witty repartée. You know, I used to dismiss you as a rather harmless buffoon. But you nearly cost me three of my children -- J.R., Colby, and now my grandson. You've been a thorn in my side ever since you tried and failed -- if you'll excuse me for stating the obvious -- to turn J.R. against me.

Tad: I wasn't trying to turn him against you. I just thought he should know the difference between love and control.

Adam: Oh, you still insist that you love J.R.? Is that why you let him think that his son drowned in the river? You watched him suffer -- you watched it -- and you never once bothered to mention that he had a son who was alive? You have a pretty strange way of showing your love, my friend.

Tad: Is class dismissed?

Adam: No. No, one more thing before the bell rings. We're going to settle this thing. We'll settle this score, an eye for an eye and tooth to tooth. You think losing J.R. hurt? You ain't seen nothing compared to what's going to happen next.

Liza: I sent Tad an encrypted message. He should get back to me really soon, and then we're just going to chart a way for you to elude Chandler Jr. and Sr.

Jamie: We don't want to put you in their high beams.

Babe: Yeah, that PI, she could've given a description that Adam recognizes or something.

Liza: Well, you know, maybe it's just time to pull up stakes again. In the meantime, we'll just stay calm and lay low.

Jamie: Are you sure?

Liza: Yeah, I'm sure. Listen, your dad did me a huge favor. No one knows more than I do what you guys are going through and what's at stake.

Babe: Liza, you warned me about the Chandler men, and I was just too blind to see that J.R. could turn out like Adam. Thank you. You really are an angel.

Liza: Oh. I wish I were. I would fold Colby up in my arms and fly away.

J.R.: We need to talk.

Bo Buchanan: You ever hear of knocking?

J.R.: I'm J.R. Chandler from Pine Valley. I have information about the baby that was kidnapped from Kevin Buchanan.

Bo: Well, you need to learn some manners, young man, but you got my attention. Tell me what you got.

J.R.: My soon-to-be-ex-wife, Babe, a.k.a. Bella Carey, was spotted in New Orleans an hour ago with the baby that she kidnapped.

Ethan: Thanks. Just stick it on there.

Kendall's voice: I was always searching for clues, trying to make some sense out of my life. I never felt like I belonged with the people who raised me. I felt like there was this connection I had to something or someone, and it was driving me crazy.

Zach: I told you to leave town.

Ethan: You knew who I was.

Zach: No, because I knew who you weren't.

Bianca: Ethan, did it ever occur to you that Zach might be lying?

Ryan: Take the test. Your DNA's a match, a new Cambias is crowned, and you get what you came for.

Bianca: You got to think about Miranda here a little bit. I mean, wouldn't it be awesome if she had somebody on the Cambias side of the family that she could trust, somebody that she could share it with?

Zach: The luckiest day of your life was when I told you you weren't my son. So what are you doing? Why are you trying to hold on to some hope that you're part of this pathetic family?

Greenlee: What a night.

Ryan: You ok?

Greenlee: I don't know. I wonder if any of us will get past this.

Kendall: I don't want to get past it. David and Krystal conspired to keep a child from its parent. It's not right. Children have a right to know where they come from.

Man: Ethan Ramsey?

Ethan: Yeah?

Man: I have some test results from the lab. I'll need to see your ID.

Ethan: Yeah.

Man: If you could, sign right here.

Ethan: Thanks.

[Ethan, Kendall, Ryan, and Greenlee all solemnly read the DNA test results]

[David groans]

David: Oy.

Krystal: Kendall and Greenlee thought they took out the trash. You ok?

David: Yeah, dandy. It's not like I ever had any real use for Ryan Lavery. And that Ethan character is just as worthless.

Krystal: Yeah, well, those gals got their licks in, too, but maybe I took some of the heat they'd been saving up for Babe.

David: Let's go home.

Krystal: Yeah. That is a good idea. You need a bath.

David: A sponge bath. Yeah, now we're talking.

Babe: And we totally freaked out when Kelly Buchanan found us.

Liza: I'll bet.

Babe: But then she saw how good we were with James and realized how terrible it would be for him to be with anyone else.

[Phone rings]

Liza: Hello?

Tad: Liza, it's me. Listen, it's ok. This is a safe line, so we're all right to talk. Unfortunately, though, that's the last of the good news.

Liza: What's the bad?

Tad: J.R.'s PI made you. She even got a picture with her cell phone.

Liza: Well, I hope she got my good side.

Tad: Are Jamie and Babe there with you right now?

Liza: Yes, along with the handsomest little gentleman. Hold on.

Jamie: Dad?

Tad: Listen, do not, I repeat, for any reason make your father cry, ok?

Jamie: Ok, fine. How cool is Liza? She totally saved us with that whole kick-butt thing.

Tad: I'm just thankful she was there. Listen, kiddo, this is important. I wouldn't call if it wasn't. Adam and J.R. are on the warpath, ok? They're on high alert, which means you cannot leave the apartment. You just stay put till I figure out a way to get you out of there.

Bo: That's a loaded charge you just made.

J.R.: I stand behind it.

Bo: And what would motivate your soon-to-be-ex-wife to kidnap the son of a Lieutenant Governor?

J.R.: He's not a Buchanan. He's a Chandler. He's my son.

>> On the next "All My Children" --

Edmund: Maria, we need to talk. It's about us.

Jonathan: You are by far the stupidest person I've ever worked with.

Greenlee: Tell Dani you're sorry, now.

Kendall: Ryan, will you please, please help me? Ethan went after Zach.

Ethan: It's time you joined your brother.

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