All My Children Transcript Thursday 10/7/04
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Jack: My, my, my. You look absolutely --
Erica: Oh, Jack, how gorgeous.
Jack: Funny, that's exactly the word I was looking for.
Erica: Oh -- and what happened to casual?
Jack: Well, I could blow out all those candles --
Jack: And maybe trade the flowers for weeds.
Erica: No, don't you dare. It's a wonderful surprise.
Erica: And it plays right into my surprise for you.
Jack: You have a tiramisu in your purse, don't you? Hmm?
Erica: Not exactly.
Erica: But a question, one very important question. It just won't wait.
Maggie: What? You think that I had feelings for Bianca? No. No. Not at all. And if that's what you think, that's fine. You can think that, but -- it's not like Bian-- oh, man.
Jonathan: Hey, no, it's ok. I'm sorry. I --
Maggie: No, you don't have to be sorry. I'm -- I'm just saying --
Jonathan: No, it's -- listen, we can -- it's cool. We can forget about it. It's not -- you want to watch me get on the dance floor? Because you'll have ammo on me for, like, next year. Anything if you don't look so sad.
Maggie: You're right. You're absolutely right. All those feelings that I had were for Bianca. Actually, I think I loved her.
J.R.: Yeah. Isn't that right?
Adam: Fine work, son. Sheer brilliance.
J.R.: Yeah, no doubt, but which act of brilliance are you talking about?
Adam: Your skill as a cinematographer. I had a smile since I discovered Liza's treachery.
Adam: But this made me smile -- you made me smile. You got great stuff.
J.R.: Yeah? You like?
Adam: I love. Forget about box office receipts. This blockbuster will score you complete custody of Bess.
Babe: Mama, could you?
Krystal: Call me if you need me.
Jamie: Babe, don't leave me hanging. What did the new paternity test prove? Please, just tell me. Who's the father of your baby, J.R. or me?
Babe: I wanted it to be you, Jamie, with all my heart.
Jamie: So I'm not a father? We didn't make a child together?
Babe: No. We didn't.
Adam: If I had come up with something this brilliant, perhaps I could have stopped Liza from stealing my daughter.
J.R.: If I would have known Liza was thinking about taking Colby, she wouldn't have made it through the front gate, I swear, Dad.
Adam: No, son, no, no, no. No, I'm not blaming you. It's not your fault. The fault lies solely with Colby�s vicious, conniving shrew of a mother. But I'll find Colby, and we'll make up for lost time. And then I will destroy Liza, with visceral precision. Yeah, you did the right thing, J.R. You -- you fixed it so Babe can never do to you what Liza did to me, and you did it with such poise and finesse.
J.R.: Ah -- I'm just hoping you had enough footage. Did you have enough?
Adam: Oh, yes. Editing was a snap -- easy, easy -- and with the miracle of modern technology, of course. No, with all that great raw material you gave me, how could I go wrong?
J.R.: It was really that good?
Adam: Four stars and two thumbs up. You will keep your baby, you will keep your money, and Babe will be left without you, with nothing but the bottle-blond strands from her bobblehead. Cross out Babe, cross out Jamie. As a matter of fact, it's even a good thing that Hayward is the father of that little tramp. Can you imagine the look on his face when he sees her being carted off to prison?
Adam: Utterly delightful.
David: Hey, Grandma.
Krystal: I'm so glad you're here.
David: Are you ok?
Krystal: Yeah. Babe's son is alive.
Krystal: I just keep wanting to say it out loud -- Babe's son is alive. Oh, God, all those tears I shed at the riverside, just thinking of that baby's pain and how he didn't stand a chance, and all that's over, because he's alive, and I just want to shout it out. I want to scream it, I want to put it up on billboards --
David: All right, no, no, wait, wait -- Krystal --
Krystal: I know, I know. I can't tell anybody yet. But I can tell you. I'm just -- well, I'm glad you're here. Babe's son is alive!
David: Yes, he is, and it's a gift. Frankly, it's a second chance that I don't deserve. Look, at the risk of sounding heartfelt, Krystal, you changed my life. You gave me a daughter and you brought another child into my life. Now, some might consider that to be a miracle.
Krystal: But not you. Oh, come on. Not even you can be that cynical. After everything that's happened?
David: It's not over yet.
Krystal: Yeah, you're right, I know. But I'm just about ready to crawl out of my skin. I just want to hold him, you know? God, I wanted to memorize his face at that diner, and there just wasn't enough time. I'll tell you what, first chance I get, I am going to give that baby a thousand kisses.
David: Oh, I'm sure he'll be happy for the first 200 or so and then --
David: I bet you he has a great laugh.
Krystal: Yeah. I can't wait to hear it and just see his smile and kiss him and just hold him tight.
David: Well, until then, maybe this will do.
Krystal: How did you do that?
David: It's a download from the Buchanan campaign site.
Krystal: Oh. Oh, could he be more beautiful?
David: Oh. He really does have his mother's glow, huh?
Krystal: Yeah, he does. But his daddy -- his daddy is J.R.
David: Yes, he is. I'm sorry.
Krystal: Well, there's plenty of sorrys to go around for this one.
Jamie: Books, toys, games, music -- I started making big plans for us, me and the baby. I mean, I'd run them by you, of course. I never would be like J.R., dictating.
Babe: Jamie, I know that.
Jamie: I tried not to get into it. I know it was just a chance, but I'd get this flash, this picture of us together. And I looked like a dad.
Babe: You would have been an amazing father.
Jamie: I would have done my best. I would have loved my baby.
Babe: I'm so sorry.
Jamie: So am I.
Erica: Only a fool would take you for granted, Jackson Montgomery. And Mona didn't raise no fool.
Jack: Here's to that.
Erica: So it's my turn to step up. That's why tonight is so important. We are alone, aren't we?
Jack: In this room, yes. In the loft, no.
Jack: Yes, and I know a teenager kind of puts the kibosh on romance, and I think that maybe we should go out tonight, but then I thought it might be better if we stayed in. I am a little bit concerned about her.
Erica: Why? What's wrong?
Jack: What's wrong is me talking about anybody or anything except you and me tonight. Come here, you.
Bianca: Oh. Ooh.
Danielle: "Whoops" doesn't cut it, does it?
Bianca: Pay no intention to the intruders. We're going to be gone in just a minute.
Reggie: J, man, you're killing me, entertaining a woman in such a sloppy manner. I told Dani and Bianca you were losing your touch.
Bianca: We're just here to bring Lily upstairs to my place.
Danielle: Yeah. We'll hang up there, you hang down here.
Reggie: B said that Lily could spend the night upstairs if she wants to, so --
Erica: That's very sweet of all of you, really, but, first, Jack has to tell me why he's so worried about Lily.
Jack: No, no, no, no, not tonight. Tonight is about you and me. Invite Lily upstairs, it's a great idea, and please do it now.
Erica: Oh, I see. I thought we were a team. I thought we helped each other. I thought we had each other's back.
Reggie: I thought so, too.
Erica: If Lily is in trouble, I want to help.
Jack: Okey-doke, good point. Well, as most of you know, Lily has been mainstreamed into high school. And she worked very, very hard this whole summer to make that transition smooth. And it was going very well, until recently. Now she comes home from school, she goes straight to her room, and she is in there for hours. I mean hours at a time. She barely comes out even to eat.
Erica: Well, Jack, she's a teenage girl. That's fairly typical.
Jack: Not typical for her. I mean, Lily's whole life is her schedule, and it is out of whack.
Erica: Well, what does her tutor have to say? I mean, her tutor pretty much shadows her at school, right?
Jack: At first, yeah, but now they just kind of, you know, check in once in a while. She says nothing's changed. As a matter of fact, she said that Lily has made some -- some real advances in the social arena.
Erica: Well, what's Lily's explanation?
Jack: She says she's doing her homework, but I go over her homework list with her, and it's not that much work. And I'm just afraid that something's going wrong and maybe it's something so bad she can't even find words for it. But what's really making me crazy is that, you know, the not knowing of it. I just wish I had some idea of what was going on. Maybe I could help in some -- hi. Hi, honey. Hi.
Erica: Hi, Lily. Oh, it's so good to see you again.
Lily: Call me Lilith. I belong now, because I'm hot.
Jack: Uh -- Lily, could you please tell me --
Jack: Lilith, yes, yes. Could you please tell me what you mean exactly by --
Jack: Hot -- thank you. Hot, yes.
Lily: Well, it's not summer hot or salsa hot. It's about who you are and if you rate.
Erica: Welcome to the teenage years.
Jack: Who exactly told you that you were hot?
Lily: Autumn, Chantal, and China.
Reggie: Oh, no.
Danielle: That crew?
Jack: What crew?
Danielle: The hot girls.
Jack: Sweetheart, did these girls invite you to join their little group?
Lily: Yes. You and my tutor and I worked on my social skills so I can fit in. And I do. I belong now.
Erica: Well, of course you do, Lilith, and -- and how wonderful.
Reggie: No -- not really. These alpha girls are like a wolf pack. Any sign of weakness, they're ready to rip your throat out.
Danielle: Then make fun of what you're wearing.
Lily: They all wear the same thing. They have T-shirts with these bar codes on them.
Danielle: Like they're the hottest products or something.
Erica: Oh --
Lily: Autumn had the number 16,777,216. I extended myself like you said, Daddy. I told her I liked her shirt because the number is eight to the eighth power. They smiled and said they like kids from the short yellow bus.
Reggie: Oh, no, they didn't.
Bianca: That means kids from the special needs bus.
Erica: Oh, no, they didn't.
Lily: They did, because they like me, and they said that all I have to do to be in their group is follow their rules. And I'm really good with rules, so now I belong.
Jack: And what rules would those be? What do you have to do, sweetheart?
Reggie: I don't think you're going to like what comes next.
Maggie: Bianca was the first person I met when I came to town. I came here to find out what happened to my sister. And with Frankie gone, even though we weren't close, I felt lost without her. And Bianca reached out, and it was really difficult for a while. It was complicated.
Jonathan: Frankie�s friend, Frankie�s sister -- what's so complicated?
Maggie: This is the same exact face as the girl that Bianca fell in love with. I mean, that's a huge mind bender. But we got past it, and -- and then when Bianca's whole world caved in with the rape and losing Miranda, we grew even closer. More than friends, but not like sisters.
Jonathan: Hey, go on.
Maggie: So a couple of months ago, you remember that whole thing that I was talking to you about, the whole heart palpitation thing? Well, it kind of got me in a headlock, and I came out and just told her. I had to do it. And she was sweet and supportive, and she was involved and is involved with this girl for a long time, and they really love each other, and so, my warm fuzzies just faded into the sunset. That was it. Oh.
Maggie: Yeah. Yeah, so that's me, right? Ok, great. Yeah, a girl who, you know, had a thing for a girl, and I know what you're thinking. I know exactly what you're thinking -- is Maggie gay, or is she trying to be oh so trendy to go the bi route? And you know what? I can't even answer your question, because I have no idea. I don't know if it's a one-shot thing, I don't know if I've, you know, mistaken friendship for something else, I don't even know if I was hiding some deep truth about myself that I wasn't ready to deal with.
Jonathan: Hey, hey -- what are you sure of?
Maggie: I've only been with guys. I'm definitely attracted to guys. I think that you know that -- yeah -- from the last time that we hung out. But you're obviously over that whole part. And you know what? I get it, you know? You're right. Because who needs this drama, right? I don't, you don't, so, you know, if you want to go now, I completely understand, because I'm --
Jonathan: Falling for someone is -- it's falling for someone, and though it might not exist in experience, I'm not about to judge you. I get your feelings for Bianca.
Maggie: Just like that? Because I am completely confused.
Jonathan: Well, now we're in the same world. Now we're both love idiots. And -- well, I think the -- I think the politically correct term is romantically challenged.
Maggie: Ok, well, whatever you call it, that's me, because I don't know how to deal with it.
Jonathan: Hey, let it be. Take your time, because you're going to figure it out. And I'll still be here.
Maggie: Could you possibly be for real?
Jonathan: Hmm, maybe I am, maybe I'm not.
Krystal: How are we going to get Ace away from the Buchanans without admitting that Babe knew about Bess all along? Now, that little ditty comes out and J.R. is going to have everything he needs to keep Babe away from her son for good.
David: That lying piece of garbage!
Krystal: No -- we got to forget about J.R.
David: I'm not talking about J.R. Paul Cramer, the other lying piece of trash. Michael Cambias must be real lonely there at the landfill. Maybe Cramer should keep him company.
Krystal: We can't spook a confession out of that crud by threatening him with a trip to the dump.
David: Who's threatening? I'm ready to off the bastard right now and let him rot in peace.
Adam: Babe and Jamie are history.
J.R.: Yeah, about that -- you don't suppose we could edit Jamie out of there, do you?
Adam: Are you joking? Well, he practically has co-star billing. He's in half of the footage. You cut him out, it'll all fall apart.
J.R.: Well, it could be done.
Adam: Why do you want it done?
J.R.: When Jamie went to prison to get the dirt on me, he almost died. Don't you think one trip behind bars is enough?
Adam: Stuart got to you, didn't he? Taking advantage of your gentle heart, your kind nature. Stuart is not infallible, J.R. Stuart waved goodbye when they carted my daughter off, so his word is not gospel. He doesn't have some insight into who you are and what you are. No, he's a man like you and like me. And forgiving Jamie is not something you have to do to protect your soul.
J.R.: I know. I know, ok? And I don't know why I care. He slept with my wife, he lied to my face, he chose my slut of a wife over me every single time, all right? He -- he's --
Adam: No, no, no, no. No. He resents you. That's what he is. Who you are, what you have -- he wants it all.
J.R.: You know, I don't care if Babe stews in prison for the rest of her life. But Jamie is my brother.
Adam: Yes, all the more reason that his constant betrayal is unacceptable. You take Jamie out of the equation, J.R., and you're going to lose your daughter.
J.R.: But if Babe is in jail, Jamie will back off.
Adam: No, no, no. Tad Martin will not back off. He doesn't know when to quit. Jamie's just like him. Jamie will spend the rest of his life trying to get between you and Bess. J.R., you have to make a choice. Either your ersatz brother or your flesh-and-blood daughter.
Babe: I'll always be grateful for what you've done for me and Bess.
Jamie: You sound like it's over.
Babe: You heard what David said.
Jamie: What? I'm not a dad, so I'm out of here?
Babe: Jamie, this isn't your fight to fight. You've done enough.
Jamie: And it's still not enough. I may not be a dad, but I am Bess' godfather, and that means something. I'm still going to do whatever it takes to make sure Bess ends up where she belongs.
Babe: No, you won't. I have trusted bad people, and I have betrayed good ones. I've mixed up right and wrong for so long I don't even know what's right anymore. I messed up with Bess and with J.R. and so many other people, and I dragged you along for every single step of the way.
Jamie: Babe, you never dragged me. The night that we met, I made my own decisions.
Babe: Now let me make mine. I came to Pine Valley because I thought that -- that it was destiny with J.R. and I was wrong. God brought me here to have a baby and to find my father and to meet wonderful people like you and Bianca. Even if it was for a short while. And I know that I don't deserve to have you guys in my life. But I want to, especially my child, and that's why I have to make things right.
Jamie: But you don't have to --
Babe: Jamie, let me do this. Let me let you go. You are the kindest, bravest, most stubborn man that I have ever met. And when I think about your future, it just makes me want to smile. College, a future, a woman, somebody that will never, ever hold you down. Look, we both know that J.R. was fighting for his soul, and he lost. And maybe I'm fighting that very same battle, but the difference is, is I'm not going to lose. I'm going to fix what's broken, and I'm not going to say that I'm not scared, because I am. But I know what I can do it because -- if I know that I'm not in your way. So I'm letting you go. Let me go. Let me do what I have to do. I swear to you, I will do right by Bess, by my baby, or I will die trying.
Krystal: Oh, right, right, yeah. Kill Paul Cramer, toss him on the scrap heap, watch the crows pluck his eyes out. You just keep playing that fantasy over and over again in that creepy, dark cave you call a brain, and then let's get back to solving the problem for real.
David: I just gave you a real solution.
Krystal: Would you snap out of it? We're talking about Babe here, not you.
David: I plan to do whatever it takes to help her put those babies back where they belong. And Babe will not go down for this. I will.
Krystal: How do you figure that?
David: I can reveal the truth that Ace is Babe's son and then admit that I knew about the switch. I mean, after all, I'm one person who could have had access to those lab results you fixed. And you and Babe knew nothing about it, ok? So you're in the clear.
Krystal: And who exactly do you think is going to believe that? You didn't even know that you were Babe's daddy when that chopper went down or when the tests were run. On top of that, you're practically related to Bianca. You're family. So what, you just kept Miranda from her just because?
David: All right, ok, I figured it all out, ok? Just now. But I did it on my own.
Krystal: How? Why? What tipped you off? What, you drove through Llanview? You spotted Ace? You said, "Hey, that kid looks like me"? Please, come on. Not even you can make that stick.
David: Well, at least I can try, right?
Krystal: And you think Tad has a white-knight complex? David, nobody is asking you to take the fall for this. We just have to think of a way to make sure that Babe --
Adam: Why aren't you chatting with Bubba in an eight-by-eight cell?
David: Must be my lucky day. The governor was handing out freebies for crimes against a Chandler. So I guess it's official -- the world really does hate you.
Adam: I'm sure you're here to see Bess and Babe, so by all means, help yourself. Don't let us keep you.
David: You plan to stab me in the back as I walk up the stairs, Adam?
Adam: You haven't felt it yet? The blade is already in place.
Jonathan: You're different for me. You like cheese in a can. You get excited about it.
Maggie: Well, cheese canned is worthy of excitement.
Jonathan: Well, I know that now, but I know that because of you. And I -- we both know I suck at this, so this -- this -- this feels right. This. And this, that. And this. This feels right.
Maggie: I sent you racing out of my apartment. Are you still terrified?
Jonathan: Totally. I'm completely freaked out, because I'm not freaked out. I like how it feels. And I think you do, too. And I want to keep this up for as long as we can.
Erica: Honey, what did your new friends ask you to do?
Lily: I'm not supposed to tell anyone, especially not Mr. McBee.
Reggie: He teaches Math.
Jack: Oh, honey, please tell me.
Lily: I do their homework. Do you think I'll still be hot even if I told you?
Jack: Wait a minute, wait a minute. You do homework for all three of these girls? That's why you've been in your room for hours and hours at night?
Lily: Well, it takes an extra 2 1/4 hours. Sometimes, even less, because it's math I already know. And you told me to extend myself and make friends, and I did. Chantal, Autumn, and China said that if I do their homework they'd make me cool. And cool can be hot. I have a cool new name and cool new friends. I am now both hot and cool.
Erica: Of course you are, Lilith. You are wonderful. And tomorrow those vultures are going to meet the original alpha-girl. They're going down.
Bianca: Oh, Mom, are you sure that you're the right one to take care of this?
Erica: Oh -- after I personally scan their bar codes and rip them off their chests.
Reggie: I call ringside.
Danielle: With all due respect, you're talking about my turf now. Those hot girls are going to be chilled by the time I'm done with them.
Krystal: Uh -- is this a bad time?
Jamie: No, it's ok. I'm going.
Jamie: You're all over the father thing, so don't stop. Help her get through this, whatever it takes.
David: In any way necessary.
Jamie: Goodbye, Babe.
Babe: Mama --
Krystal: Oh, honey -- oh. What did you tell him?
Babe: Not about Ace being mine. When I find out what the results said, I -- I couldn't do it. I just told him that my baby's daddy is J.R.
Krystal: And he's hurting.
Babe: He was making plans, Mama. It wasn't even anything like J.R. trying to take my baby away. Plans -- plans to love the child and -- and a future. And even when he found out the truth, he still wanted to help.
David: You know that's not possible, Babe. It's too dangerous. Not now.
Babe: I know. I know that, and that's why -- that's why I had to send him away, because of the truth that's coming out. And he's going to know what kind of person I am, and there's no way I could look in his eyes. Oh -- Mom, it would break my heart, and -- I don't know, I probably deserve that, but -- and now I -- watching him go -- that broke my heart, too. Oh, Mom, I'm going to miss him so much.
J.R.: Hey, Jamie -- can you wait a second?
Jamie: What? You need more lead time?
J.R.: For what?
Jamie: Call the cops. Get me cuffed for trespassing.
J.R.: No, no, no, no, no. No more fighting.
Jamie: I wish to God this was all over.
J.R.: Well, we've got to have some sort of common ground here, don't we?
Jamie: Maybe the fact that everything's screwed up?
J.R.: I agree.
Jamie: Things never should have gotten this bad.
Jamie: No one's where they belong.
J.R.: I agree.
Jamie: And it is all your fault. Are we on the same page there? You wanted what you wanted, forget everybody else.
J.R.: Do you want to talk about this, man to man, brother to brother, or you want to sit here and accuse me?
Jamie: How can we talk man to man? Because as Adam's clone, technically, you don't qualify as a legit human. And as far as brother to brother -- how can you be my brother if you mean nothing to me?
Jack: Well, the kids are in there right now trying to deprogram my Lily. Well, there's nothing sadder than a wasted evening of romance, is there? The dinner -- I didn't even put the dinner in the oven.
Erica: No, it's ok. Actually, right now I'm in the mood for a burger.
Jack: A burger?
Erica: I am. You know that little place around the corner --
Erica: The one that takes the ketchup bottles off the table when they know that Lily is coming in?
Jack: Ok. Well, if you want a burger, a burger you shall have.
Erica: And I want Bianca, Reggie, Danielle, and Lily to come with us.
Jack: What happened to our night of romance? What happened to your important question?
Erica: That can wait till later. Right now it seems our family comes first.
Jack: It is a strange family.
Erica: I couldn't love it more.
Jack: I know the feeling.
Maggie: Hey, stranger. Jamie. That's my roommate.
Jonathan: Right. Hey, hi. I'm -- I'm Jonathan. I'm Jonathan Lavery.
Jonathan: Well, we met before, out back with your blond friend --
Jamie: Oh, yeah, right. Right.
Jonathan: Well, I just -- I wanted to make sure that all that was in the past and behind us --
Jamie: Oh, no -- it's -- it's cool. It's fine. Whatever. That's --
Jonathan: Ok. All right. I'm going to -- I'm going to -- you want a drink? I'm going to go get some drinks.
Maggie: Yeah. Thanks.
Jonathan: Yeah, excuse me for just a second.
Maggie: Thanks. Hey -- hey, what's wrong with you?
Jamie: Nothing. I'm just -- I haven't finished my psych paper. I keep blowing off lit. I tanked a bio exam. And if I don't get it together, my grades are going to get me kicked off the football team.
Maggie: It's called college. So what? It's what happens. I've never seen you this stressed out about that stuff before.
Jamie: Well, I'd better start stressing. I mean, this is my life, right? Maybe if I say that over and over again, I'll actually give a damn.
Maggie: Have you -- have you given up on Babe, like you said you would?
Jamie: Well, it turns out my vote doesn't even count. She wants me gone, so I'm gone.
Maggie: Jamie, what do you want?
David: Do the right thing, Babe, for you and for Jamie.
Babe: I didn't have a choice. I have to do this on my own.
Krystal: Oh -- no way is either one of us going to let you do this single-handedly, Babe.
Babe: It's so big, Mama. It's bigger than we ever imagined. What are we going to do?
Krystal: Well, listen. Your folks have a fair amount of smarts between us. We'll take care of the how. But you will get your son back, and Bianca will get her daughter.
Babe: And J.R.? If you thought things were ugly before, what --
Krystal: We'll handle J.R. and Adam.
David: That's right, with great satisfaction and enjoyment. No matter what, you are going to have a life with your boy.
Babe: You can't know that for sure.
David: Oh, I can, and I do. I give you my word, and I am ready to make it happen.
J.R.: I made a decision. That thing with Jamie earlier -- that was just a momentary lapse.
Adam: You're done protecting him?
J.R.: I'm moving forward. That DVD will make Babe crash and burn, and Jamie's going to go down with her.
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Tad: You know what's really up with that DNA test, don't you?
Jamie: Let's just forget about it, all right? It's over.
J.R.: You still are my brother's biggest fan. How would you like to be the one to send him to prison?
Krystal: Do the right thing, Kelly. Give that baby back to his real mama.
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