All My Children Transcript Friday 7/2/04
Proofread by Gisele
Erica: Oh. Oh. Wonderful.
[Knock on door]
Erica: At this hour?
Erica: I said I'm coming!
Jack: Good morning.
Erica: What do you want?
Jack: I want to talk.
Erica: What's changed since last night? Last night you couldn't get me out of your place fast enough. How is Lily? No permanent harm done, I hope.
Jack: She's fine. Erica, last night, I was -- I was angry.
Erica: Well, I still am, so unless there's something really pressing --
Jack: There is. I want -- I want to apologize. Last night all I could see was Lily -- her fear.
Erica: You know very well that I would never do anything to hurt Lily.
Jack: Not when you were sober, no.
Jack: Please -- no, please, wait, wait, wait. I want -- I want to talk about this. I want to -- I want to talk about everything that's happened, Erica.
Erica: About how I ran off and left you, about how I hurt you, about how I disappointed you again and again and again and again?
Jack: Listen, I love -- I love you! I love you. I want you back in my life.
Erica: Well, maybe we can discuss that later, over drinks.
Jack: Now would be good.
Erica: Look, Jack, I just woke up. Look, I haven't even had my coffee yet. Excuse me.
Jack: Wait a minute.
Erica: That is cranberry juice.
Opal: A big dose of salt will lift that stain right out. Best thing for red wine.
Erica: Well, doesn't anyone call anymore?
Bianca: Hi, Mom.
Erica: What are you doing here? I know it's not my birthday.
Opal: We want to talk.
Erica: Not, you, too.
Myrtle: We're worried about you, darling.
Jack: Your drinking has us all concerned.
Bianca: We love you, Mom. We want to help you.
Erica: Oh, God. This is an intervention. You have all convinced yourselves that I'm a drunk! And you want to sit around and hold hands and complain about how bad I make you feel. Well, you know what? I've got plenty of complaints myself.
Jack: Erica, just hear us out, please.
Erica: No, you hear me out. I want you all out of my home right now! Go on, get out, now! I mean it! I want you out of here! If you think I won't call security --
Bianca: If you throw us out of here, we'll be back tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that. You've done this for people that you love, Mom. You did it for Uncle Mark.
Erica: Uncle Mark was addicted to cocaine!
Bianca: You did it for me.
Erica: You were sick.
Bianca: You told me that I was killing myself. If you hadn't stopped me, I wouldn't be here today.
Erica: I'm not squandering my money on cocaine. I'm not starving myself to death. I have a problem with pills. I have dealt with that. I don't have a problem with alcohol.
Jack: But it is an addictive substance, Erica, and you can't seem to get enough of it.
Erica: This is ridiculous!
Opal: No, it couldn't be more serious, Erica.
Erica: You know something? The last time Jackson called you over here to discuss my "drinking," he at least served brunch. So I'll tell you what -- Coral's going to be here soon. I know she'd be delighted to make you all breakfast, so why don't you enjoy that without me.
Jack: Erica? Erica --
Kendall: I knew this wouldn't work. I knew it. She's always been too self-righteous.
Bianca: Well, now what?
Jack: Now we wait.
Kendall: Ok, well, what if she never comes out?
Jack: Well, she has to come out, Kendall, eventually, doesn't she?
Opal: I think this calls for a little womano a womano. I'll be right back.
Jack: Just remember, we're supposed to approach Erica with love and respect.
Opal: I'll keep that in mind. Honey? Honey, it's me. Let me in.
Erica: Go away!
Opal: Erica, you are my bestest friend in the whole wide world. You always have been, always will be. I love you. I love you, but I -- and I'm trying my darnedest here to respect you, but, boy, this second part isn't coming too easy right now.
Erica: Well, just leave me alone!
Opal: Boy, that temper of yours has always been hotter than spit on a griddle, honey, and believe it or not, I love that about you, you know that? I always have and I always will, and you know something else that I love about you, one of the many qualities? It's your leather, and I'm not talking about that fancy collection of custom-made jackets and skirts you got. I'm talking about that coat or armor you wear underneath. Erica, you've always been a fighter. Ever since I've known you, you have been fearless in the face of just about everything. I mean, Miss Erica "bring it on" Kane -- that's you. But this running off without so much as a backward glance, locking out the people that love you -- I mean, there's nothing brave about that. That just shows you've turned coward.
Myrtle: She's poked our tiger with a stick.
Opal: So you can stay in there, curled up all sorry for yourself, or you can march right out here and show us your brass. What's it going to be, Erica? There. That wasn't so hard, now, was it?
Erica: You want an intervention? Fine. I'll play. And I'll prove all of you wrong. Please, intervene.
Jack: I want to talk to you about how your alcoholic behavior has affected me and my life and my loved ones in a negative way.
Erica: Oh, you're such an excellent student. Tom would be so proud.
Jack: Last night when you came to my loft, you absolutely terrified Lily.
Erica: I hadn't seen her in ages. I wasn't thinking.
Jack: You were drunk.
Erica: I was tired.
Jack: You were drunk. You were out of control. You didn't give one moment's thought to my daughter because, Erica, when you're drinking, the only person you care about is yourself. And if you're going to continue drinking, I don't want you around Lily anymore. In fact, I don't want you around me anymore.
Erica: Well, then, knocking on my door this morning was a pretty big mistake.
Jack: Well, maybe I thought it was my last option. It hurt so much last night to find myself yelling at you, to find myself throwing you out of my place. It hurt almost as much as watching you take your first drink since your recovery.
Erica: You make it sound like I was roaring drunk.
Jack: It was right here in this room, right after Kendall's trial. I was so proud of you during that trial, so proud to love you and to be loved by you, to be your fiancé. You showed such strength, such dignity, such love for your daughters. And then when the trial was over, I came here to be with you, to share the things that we'd been through together -- and Lord knows we had plenty to talk about, huh? When I got here, you were all alone, drinking wine.
Erica: Should I have offered you a glass?
Jack: It was the first time that I saw that look in your eyes. Vacant, dead.
Erica: Well, how flattering. Did you ever consider that it wasn't because of the wine? I shut down on you after the trial, but with good reason. You betrayed me. You knew that my daughter Bianca was still pregnant, but you kept it from me and you never missed a step. You even proposed to me and still you didn't tell me. And you want me to love you now and trust you now when you lied to me for so long about something so important!
Bianca: Mom, don't blame Uncle Jack.
Erica: Don't defend him!
Bianca: It was my secret! I asked him and Kendall not to tell you.
Erica: Yes, that's right. My own daughter thought that I couldn't be trusted.
Bianca: It wasn't about trust.
Erica: You shut me out. Jack, Kendall, David, Maggie -- I mean, the list goes on and on. Everyone knew but me -- your own mother.
Kendall: Bianca did it to protect you.
Erica: Bianca -- Bianca did it to control me. And isn't that what you all want? Isn't that what this little roundup is all about today? You want to herd me into a nice, neat little corner and make me behave.
Kendall: Please. Everyone knows you can't be controlled. You do whatever you want, to hell with everyone else.
Jack: Ok, ok, ok. We're not here to attack.
Kendall: No, this is fact! This is a fact, Jack. Mother, your daughter lost her baby, and you took off to Vegas.
Jack: And we are not here to accuse, either, all right?
Erica: This is very gallant of you, Jack. But, really, you don't have to defend me. It's a little late to protect me. You all blame me for everything that has gone wrong in your lives, and this is your chance to vent. This is not an intervention, this is a feeding frenzy!
Kendall: Is your drinking our fault? Do we pin you to a bar and pour the hard stuff down your throat?
Jack: Whoa, whoa, that's enough! Kendall, that's enough.
Erica: No, please, let her talk. What should I take responsibility for, Kendall?
Kendall: The night you sent Bianca into that storm.
Bianca: No, Kendall, don't do this!
Kendall: No, you were drinking! You were drinking, you were angry. Your precious interview was a bust. For some reason, the reporter was more interested in your pregnant daughter's trauma than your fashion line, so you took it out on Bianca. You made her suffer. You told her we'd all suffer when she had her child, a child cursed by rape, the legacy of the curse -- blah, blah, blah, blah. You slit Bianca's heart. You pushed her away, you made her run out, and you got exactly what you wished for. She lost the baby you never wanted her to have. Bianca lost her daughter because of you.
Kendall: Well, say something, Mother. Tell me I'm wrong, that I don't understand, that it was fate, an accident -- anything but your fault Bianca's baby is dead. What's the matter, your throat dry? You need a drink? You don't have an answer, do you?
Opal: Kendall --
Kendall: Because you know -- you know you're to blame.
Opal: We are here to help your mother. Now, if you can't do that, you better leave.
Kendall: No, don't worry, I'm here to help. I am, I really am. Because I want you to know the facts, Mother. I want you to sleep off the booze and see the truth in the cold, bright lights of sobriety. Bianca's baby is dead because of you!
Bianca: Kendall, please don't do this!
Erica: Bianca, do you blame me for losing Miranda?
Bianca: No. I don't blame you for Miranda’s death.
Erica: Then -- well, then, why did you -- the day at the hospital, when you said that I was -- I was not your mother and that we could never go back --
Bianca: I had just lost my baby. The pain was so much that I thought it would kill me. It almost did. But in a strange way, it stripped everything away -- all the pretense, all the lies that we were telling each other. I knew that -- I knew I couldn't do the dance anymore.
Erica: The dance? I don't understand.
Bianca: Our dance, Mom. Our act, our game. What we've been doing ever since Michael raped me. I didn't tell you that I had been raped for a long time. I didn't tell you when I found out I was pregnant or when I decided to keep the baby. I mean, we talked around so much, we avoided the subject for a reason. Because you didn't want to hear the truth any more than I wanted to tell you.
Erica: You could have told me all of it. I wanted to help you.
Bianca: You couldn't help me, Mom, because you had never gotten over your own rape or having Kendall.
Erica: You didn't have to protect me.
Bianca: I wasn't protecting you. I was protecting myself.
Erica: From me?
Bianca: I could barely handle my own pain. I couldn't take on yours, too.
Erica: I would never have done that to you.
Bianca: You couldn't help it, Mom. You've never healed. When I lost Miranda, I realized that I had to save myself. I made a choice. I chose to push you away because I didn't want to get trapped in the shame and the guilt and the anger that you've never dealt with.
Erica: So you shut me out?
Bianca: It was the only way. I couldn't let you hold me back.
Erica: I -- I had no idea that I was so toxic.
Myrtle: Erica, let her finish.
Bianca: I know I hurt you, Mom, but I didn't -- I didn't have any choice. I don't want to live my life between waves of pain. That's why I'm in therapy, because it helps me let go of all the hurt and all the anger.
Erica: I told you, I don't need therapy.
Bianca: You don't need alcohol! Maybe you think that it helps you, that it dulls the pain or it helps you escape from it for a while, but the pain is still there. The drinking only helps you hold on to it.
Erica: Did you learn that in therapy?
Bianca: No, I learned it watching you. It doesn't have to be this way, Mom. You can get real help. You can come with me to one of my rape groups, and they will help you. They will listen to you.
Erica: Bianca, I don't need sharing and group hugs to help me solve my problems.
Kendall: Of course you don't need therapy. Why get sane? I mean, it's so much more fun to be miserable.
Erica: For you, maybe, Kendall.
Kendall: No, you love your pain, Mother, and anyone who tries to take it away from you, they pay for it. You make sure of that.
Jack: Ok, ok, you know what? Take it down a little bit, ok?
Opal: Yeah, that's not helping.
Kendall: No, I remember the night Bianca was raped. That storm, the thunder and lightning -- that was you and me, remember? You relived your rape, and I felt for you. I was there for you, because you let me in. You let me talk you down when it was all over. You let me take care of you until you felt safe. That night -- that night, you let me believe that we could start over. I felt like I mattered. I had a mother who trusted me and who loved me, even. But now -- now I wish to God it never happened, because you took it all back. You took it all back. You turned on me, you shut me out. You pushed me away, and you want to know why? You want to know why? Because you had to keep hating me, the child of your rape, the monument to your suffering. It's the only way you could hang on to all this misery that you love so much!
Kendall: Yes! You've been outed, Erica. You've been outed. Pain is your secret weapon. You use it. You use it, you feed on it, and you use it to control everyone around you. You bring us right -- you bring us right down with you! And there's no escaping it -- there's never escaping it because it never ends! It never ends! Well, congratulations, Erica! Congratulations! Hail to the queen martyr of the world!
Bianca: Kendall, come on. Come on.
Opal: Well, give me a stick. I'm going to smack the stupid out of that girl.
Myrtle: She spoke from her heart. Alcohol is not the only problem we're handling here.
Erica: Well, Jack, should I thank you now for putting together this little party? It's really helping, don't you think? I know I feel better. How about everybody else? Glad you came? Ready for another round, so to speak?
Myrtle: Erica, Erica -- darling, do you remember -- do you remember how it was, how you felt about the pills?
Erica: Oh, Myrtle, please don't let them worry you. This is not the same thing.
Myrtle: Yes, but if you'll remember, you went to the cemetery and you spoke to Mona, and, well, somehow it helped you to make the right decision.
Erica: Mona can't help me now. My mother's dead.
Myrtle: But I'm here. I'm here. Let me help you like before. Darling, darling, we'll -- we'll find everything you need to make everything right again for you.
Erica: Haven't you been paying attention, Myrtle? Kendall said I don't want help. I love my pain.
Myrtle: No, no --
Erica: I embrace it!
Myrtle: No, no --
Erica: I celebrate it!
Myrtle: Erica -- oh, God, oh, God. Erica, don't.
Opal: Are you all right, honey?
Myrtle: Yes, yes, yes, yes. I'm fine. I've got to stay here. I need to help Erica.
Opal: You can't help her if you're collapsed, you know.
Bianca: Myrtle, please. It's all right.
Myrtle: Maybe I should rest, maybe a little.
Opal: Yeah. Let's do that, honey.
Erica: Myrtle, you can use my room.
Myrtle: Erica, do you -- do you remember years ago I said to you that no matter what you did, I would be beside you till the end of the world?
Erica: Well, some people feel that that's right around the corner, so maybe you better hurry and duck for cover. You know, the sky is falling.
Myrtle: Darling, darling, I would -- I would hold the sky up with my two hands if I thought that that would be needed to make you believe that you've got all the help that you need to beat this thing right here in this room.
Erica: Opal, there's an extra blanket in my closet if Myrtle needs it.
Myrtle: Oh, Erica.
Opal: Come on, Myrt. Excuse us.
Myrtle: Thank you.
Erica: Congratulations, Jack. Is everything going the way you hoped it would? Is this what you envisioned when you concocted this little event? Sorry to disappoint you. I'm still here. Although you did take Myrtle down -- oh, unless you want to try to blame me for that, too. Well, to this fabulous intervention. To you, Jackson. May you find a woman worthy of you and your perfection. Cheers, Kendall. I may love my pain, but not nearly as much as you do. And to Bianca. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for so many things. And I do wish so much that I could've helped you. And last -- and according to you, least -- to me! To Erica Kane, queen of pain!
Mark: To my beautiful sister, who saved my life.
Erica: Mark. Oh, Mark! Oh, what are you doing here? When did you get in? Oh, you look wonderful! You have no idea how good it is to see you!
Mark: That's some greeting.
Erica: Well, it's not every day that my brother comes all the way from Hong Kong to see me. I mean, why didn't you call? Why didn't you let me know you were coming? I would've had the guestroom ready for you. I would've brought on all your favorite food. Jackson called you.
Mark: I couldn't wait to get here to see you.
Bianca: Uncle Mark.
Mark: Hey, gorgeous.
Mark: I'm sorry about the baby. How you doing?
Bianca: I'm ok. Some days are better than others.
Jack: Mark, thanks so much for coming. It means a lot.
Opal: Well, Myrt's resting. I think she'll be ok. Well, as I live and breathe! Oh. You still tickling the ivories?
Mark: Never stopped.
Opal: Glad to see you.
Kendall: Don't worry, I don't expect a hug.
Mark: Too bad. Bianca's kept in e-touch. She tells me you've gotten her through some pretty rough times. Past is past. You've been a great sister.
Erica: Is that why you're here, Mark? To be a great brother?
Mark: I'm here because I love you.
Erica: When did Jack sound the alarm?
Mark: A few days ago. I cleared my schedule and here I am.
Erica: Oh, boy, Jack. You really went all out. This is a really international affair. Mark, surely you have better things to do than get involved in this -- this waste of time.
Mark: I know how you feel.
Erica: You have no idea.
Mark: You're angry and suspicious. You feel cornered and trapped. I know. It's tough, Erica. I also know that if I hadn't felt the way you're feeling right now, I'd be in the ground.
Erica: But there's no need for this.
Mark: Your intervention saved my life. And now it's my turn to get between you and your addiction to alcohol, if you'll let me.
Erica: This is crazy! I don't have a problem with alcohol!
Mark: Like I didn't have one with cocaine?
Erica: Mark, it's not the same.
Mark: It's exactly the same.
Erica: Mark, when you were addicted to drugs, you lost everything. You lied, you stole. Your addiction to drugs -- I mean, you cost your wife's career, too. I mean, you destroyed her business. My God, Ellen had a miscarriage because of your addiction.
Mark: Everyone bottoms out, Erica. Yours just isn't as ugly as mine.
Erica: Mark, don't you think I would know if I had a problem? Don't you think I would recognize the signs? I mean, when I was addicted to pills, I lost everything -- my marriage, my career. I was out on the streets trying to get a fix. I was almost beat up by a drug dealer. That's addiction. This -- this is just enjoying the finer things in life.
Mark: That is denial. And this is the hardest part. You have to look into the eye of whatever it is that makes you want to take the next drink. You have to deal with whatever it is that's hurting you. Erica, I should know. It almost killed me. What is it you don't want to face?
Erica: Well, apparently, I'm not dealing with the fact that I love my pain.
Mark: Sweetie, that's huge. I had that. I was totally convinced I was a two-fisted loser, no matter what I accomplished. No matter how successful I was, it wasn't good enough, I wasn't good enough. How could I be, thanks to dear old dad?
Erica: No. I don't want to talk about our father.
Mark: Well, he's dead. And I'm glad. And I know you went to Vegas to see him, and I know it was too late. That's it, isn't it? Isn't it? That's it! There's your hell -- on a cold slab!
Mark: Erica, you're not in this alone. Everybody that loves you wants to help. All the people you wouldn't trust, all the people you've tried to push away, all the people you accuse of hurting you the most. It took me years to understand this stuff!
Erica: Well, I assume you're going to share your wisdom.
Mark: Erica, it was our father. A father's love is supposed to wrap around you. It's supposed to make you strong and keep you safe. And our father's love hurt. He'd dangle it just out of reach, so close and every time you wanted to believe it was real, he'd yank it away! He did it over and over and over again, and if my own father would do that to me, how could I believe that anyone would ever really love me? Erica, it doesn't help them to do what our father did.
Erica: Oh, don't say that. I'm not like him.
Mark: Then don't take your love away from the people that love you the most. Don't cut them off, because you're afraid of getting hurt.
Erica: I'm not like our father, Mark. I'm not like him.
Mark: Then you better change your life. Because if you don't, you're going to end up alone just like him.
Erica: He deserved it.
Mark: We don't. We deserve to be loved. We deserve to be able to love ourselves. Just because our father couldn't doesn't mean we're not worthy. Erica, I am so content with life. My business is great, I found a church. I've got friends, real friends -- not people I get high with, but people I can count on and people that can actually count on me, all because I can love without being afraid.
Mark: Erica, what is it? What's wrong?
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Krystal: Somebody slipped Babe a mickey, and I'm going to prove it. I'm going to find out who messed her up if it takes my last breath.
David: Happy hunting.
Erica: If anyone ever needed a drink, I do. Please don't stop me.
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