AMC Transcript Wednesday 11/20/02


 All My Children Transcript Wednesday 11/20/02

Provided by Suzanne
Proofread by Kathy

>> Previously on "All My Children" --

Casey: Let me clarify this. Greenlee, you quit. And you, Kendall, are fired.

Simone: Anthony, Frank.

Woman: Breathe!

Man: Come on, come on!

Adam: Liza's sponsoring this ball to raise money for Brooke’s charity.

Tad: A bunch of co-dependent people running around with masks on.

Liza: I'm taking Colby, and I'm filing for a divorce.

Kendall: Look, Aidan, I know I said I would meet you at the Valley Inn, but I can't because Greenlee might be there.

Aidan: So? So, you girls work together.

Kendall: No, not anymore. That backstabbing psycho got me fired. Now I'm stuck playing nursemaid to Petey Cortlandt for a living, which means that if I see Greenlee again, I might do permanent damage.

[Phone rings]

Greenlee: Hello.

Trey: Hey, it's Trey. Where are you? I thought you were going to meet me at the Valley Inn.

Greenlee: I'm at the pit. Going to have a drink.

Trey: Oh. Your first day at work was that bad?

Greenlee: It was my last, thanks to your skank of a sister.

Trey: What?

Greenlee: That backstabbing psycho got me fired. And I can't go to the Valley Inn because she lives there. If I see her, I can't be responsible for what I'll do.

Trey: Hang on. I'll be right there.

Greenlee: Bartender, a double vodka.

Kendall: A double vodka.

Greenlee and Kendall: You.

Simone: I thought I'd find you here.

Frank: Hey, Simone. What's up?

Simone: I came by to find out what time you're taking me to the party.

Frank: Yeah, about that -- I can't --

Simone: Oh, don't tell me you're bagging.

Frank: I am.

Simone: No --

Frank: I have to cover for Tandon. She's sick.

Simone: Yeah, right.

Frank: Hey, it's the truth.

Simone: Mm-hmm.

Frank: She's got some stomach thing. She nearly collapsed in the doctors' lounge.

Simone: And you're the only one that can fill in?

Frank: I'm just an intern. I can't say no.

Simone: This isn't about covering a shift, and you know it.

Laurie: I can't wait. I've never been to a fancy charity thing before.

Jamie: Why did it have to be your dad's house?

J.R.: Who knows? But Liza's all fired up about it. I guess it's her escape.

Jamie: So she had to pick my mom's charity?

J.R.: I think she gets off on the fact that your mom started the shelter with the divorce settlement from my dad.

Jamie: This whole thing's sick. I got to stand there and watch your dad and my mom act like they're doing some kind of good deed when we all know the deed they're doing.

J.R.: I feel kind of sorry for Liza. She's throwing this party, and she's clueless that her husband and the guest of honor are -- well, she has no idea.

Jamie: I say we bag this farce and --

Laurie: You can’t. Joni's counting on going with you. We've been working nonstop just to pay for our outfits.

Jamie: Joni's cool. She'll understand if we ditch some lame costume party.

Adam: Your mother would be crushed, Jamie. I know she wants you at that party tonight.

Jamie: Don't you dare tell me what my mother wants.

[Music plays]

[Knock on door]

Tad: Your gondola awaits, madam. Or shall I say senora?

Brooke: This is ridiculous. You know, I don't know -- you know, it's beyond me why Liza had to have this as a costume party.

Tad: Oh, I don't know. Maybe because it's supposed to be fun. Come on, where's your sense of mystery, your sense of intrigue? I mean, think of it -- think of it as a page out of Machiavelli.

Brooke: Yes. That's exactly what I'm afraid of.

Tad: Don't be such a nudzh. You'll have a great time. I know you will. And you're off to a terrific start. You look sensational. With you on my arm, I shall be the envy of every gentleman in the room.

Brooke: No, you won’t. I'm not going.

Tad: 60 bucks an hour for nothing.

Mia: What are you doing?

Mia: Liza, what are you doing with my purse?

Liza: I was getting ready to put it aside. The house is going to be crawling with guests soon. Where's Colby?

Mia: She's got Marian doing her hair eight different ways. Listen, I wanted to talk to you about the pregnancy test that Colby found in my purse.

Liza: No, you know what? I just wish that you wouldn't leave things lying around or let Colby go through your purse. It's very difficult to explain.

Mia: I understand. I -- there are some things that I would like to be able to talk to you about --

Liza: Well, we're going to have a house full of guests soon, and I don't have time for a heart-to-heart.

Mia: Well, later then, maybe, you know?

Liza: Much.

Mia: Okay, well, I'm going to go get ready, then. If you'd like, I could stop in and see how Colby is.

Liza: No, I'm sure that's not necessary. I'm sure my mother has everything under control.

Adam: Where are my two best girls? There you are, sweetie. What did the doctor say?

Mia: It's just like you thought. We're having a boy!

Adam: That's wonderful, that's wonderful. Did you hear that, princess? You're going to have that baby brother you always wanted.

Mia: That's right.

Colby: Mia, you're the best mom in the whole world.

Liza: Nobody's taking my daughter from me. No one.

Adam: Jamie, I only wanted to say --

Jamie: I don't care what you have to say.

J.R.: Chill, okay?

Jamie: Forget it. I'm out of here.

Laurie: You're meeting me and Joni at the party, right?

Jamie: Whatever.

Adam: The boy clearly inherited his father's charm.

J.R.: What are you doing here, Dad?

Adam: I was on my way home from a meeting with my attorney. I saw your car in the parking lot.

J.R.: So?

Adam: Well, I would prefer that you were home helping with the party. This evening means a lot to Liza.

J.R.: Like you care.

Adam: J.R., don't be rude in front of your friend. Laurie, nice to see you again.

J.R.: Can you believe him?

Laurie: I'm sorry. I know tonight's going to be hard for you.

J.R.: Not with you there. I promise, you're going to have a great time. Do you want me to pick you up in my dad's limo?

Laurie: It's okay. Joni's picking me up. I'll meet you and Jamie at your house.

J.R.: Okay. Just don't be late. The party's going to be dragging till you get there.

Woman: Laurie. I've been trying to reach you all day.

Laurie: Cassie, what?

Cassie: Two of my best waitresses called in sick. I came here to recruit some waiters for tonight. I need you.

Laurie: Tonight?

Cassie: I'm catering the charity ball at the Chandler mansion. You did say to call you anytime I need help.

Laurie: Yeah, I really need the money, Cassie, but --

Cassie: You can't say no. I'm strapped here. If you don't come through for me tonight, I may not call you again.

Laurie: I don't want to lose this job, but I --

Cassie: Good. Put this on. You know where the Chandlers live?

Laurie: Sure, but, Cassie --

Cassie: I'll fill you in once you get there -- like in an hour, okay? Good.

Brooke: I was insane to think that I could go through with this.

Tad: No, you were insane to think you can back out of it. Look, this is a benefit for the Brooke English Shelter. It's your charity.

Brooke: Oh, how can I allow Liza to throw a party in my name when I've slept with her husband? It's just -- it's too awful.

Tad: You're not sleeping with him now, are you?

Brooke: It doesn't matter. The damage has been done.

Tad: Just stop being so overly melodramatic. Look, the fact is you cannot bail on all those good people that are willing to show up and support the shelter. They need you.

Brooke: They need me to go to a party?

Tad: What about our son, huh? What about Jamie? He needs you, too.

Brooke: Oh, I'm sure he is so excited to show up at this event.

Tad: You're missing the point. He needs to see you on your feet. He needs to know that you're not beaten. And by the way, so do you.

Brooke: You think so?

Tad: I know so. In the last month, you have done everything but run around Pine Valley in a sandwich board that says "kick me." Enough is enough. You got to get out there and reclaim your life.

Brooke: I have to go to a masquerade party to do that?

Tad: The party isn't important. What is is this is an opportunity for you to prove to this town what you are made of, to prove once and for all that you are the amazing person that I have always known you to be. And by the way, if anybody -- and I mean anybody -- gives you a hard time tonight, I'm going to get medieval on them -- or at least Venetian. After all, I am dressed for the occasion.

Brooke: You --

Tad: Yeah, I know. So I've been told. You ready to go?

Brooke: Well, no. Now I have to fix my makeup, thanks to you. I'll be right back.

Tad: Okay. I'll just --

Brooke: Just stand there.

Tad: Sit here. Maybe you're right. Oh, my God. I need a board. Hey, kiddo. You better hurry up and put on your drag --

Jamie: Forget the stupid party. If I go, I'll take on Adam Chandler.

Greenlee: It's not enough you stole my job. Now you're stalking me.

Kendall: Stalking you? I don't want to be anywhere near you.

Greenlee: Mm-hmm.

Kendall: I put my career you today.

Greenlee: Twisting the knife in my back is more like it.

Kendall: No, I covered for you. And what possessed you to scribble all over those mockups?

Greenlee: You stole my ideas.

Kendall: I gave you credit for those ideas.

Greenlee: Oh, and I'm supposed to take your word, you two-faced, lying, job-stealing twit?

Kendall: No, you're supposed to act like you have a brain in your head, you spoiled, self-destructive little nut case. You don't need a job. You need a shrink.

Greenlee: You're going to need a doctor when I'm through with you.

Kendall: Oh, I'm so scared, I'm so scared. Don't push me. Do not push me.

Man: Whoa, whoa --

Kendall: Who the hell are you?

Man: Ladies, ladies. Now, as much as I get off watching two frustrated babes take it out on each other, I got to tell you -- save it for the ring.

Kendall: The ring?

Man: Yeah, the mud-wrestling pit out back. I'd pay money to watch you two go at it.

Kendall: Oh --

Greenlee: Get away from us.

Kendall: And who are you calling "frustrated babes"?

Man: Hey, honey, it's not an insult. I am the love doctor, and that's my diagnosis. You ain't getting no satisfaction.

Kendall: Like you could ever satisfy me. Please.

Man: I got the answer to all your prayers, baby.

Kendall: Get lost, loser.

Man: You don't know what you're missing, sweetheart.

Kendall: Ow! You are going to be missing a body part if you do not back the hell off.

Man: Ooh. You are hot. I like that. Come on, baby, light my fire.

Greenlee: How about I put it out.

Man: You shouldn't have done that.

Greenlee: I'm so scared, I'm shaking.

Man: I guess you do need a man to keep you in line, don't you, huh? Huh?

Second man: Get him. Get him!

Kendall: Leave her the hell -- leave her alone.

Woman: Oh!

Man: Jealous?

Kendall: Oh, I'm going to puke.

Man: Yeah? Now you're asking for it.

Kendall: Get off me! Get the hell off of me.


Man: Oh, kinky.


Frank: Can you take that to Radiology for me?

Nurse: Yes, Doctor.

Frank: Thanks. Thanks for waiting.

Simone: You don't owe me an explanation.

Frank: I thought you wanted one.

Simone: I know why you're avoiding me, okay? I'm not surprised, and I don't blame you.

Frank: Well, you're going to have to clue me in because I'm lost.

Simone: It's about my father -- you know, him seeing us half-dressed, you know?

Frank: Simone, we were doing something that is completely okay for two people to do in the privacy of their own home.

Simone: Yeah, I know that, but he's also on the hospital board. And I promise you, you're not going to lose your job. I will talk to him about this.

Frank: You think I'm worried about -- you think I'm worried about losing my job?

Simone: Well, it's not just a job. It's your career.

Frank: This isn't about your father.

Simone: Really? Well, then, what is it about? What, the thrill of the chase is over? Now you're on to your next conquest?

Frank: No. No. You know that I am not that kind of guy. Otherwise you would've never -- we wouldn't never have -- ahem -- you know.

Simone: Yeah, I know. And I know you're a good guy. But I don't understand this -- this -- you know, you run so hot and cold with me.

Frank: Come on, Simone. This is not about you, all right? I got called in to handle a shift, and that's it.

Simone: If you say so.

Frank: Look, why don't you, you know, go to the ball without me? Maybe you'll have fun.

Simone: Yeah, maybe. I'll let you get back to work.

Tad: Whoa. Whoa. Come here. What has gotten into you?

Jamie: Adam Chandler. I hate him. He thinks that he can tell me --

Tad: Shh. Did he say something to you?

Jamie: He thinks he can tell me what mom wants. He came right into B.J.'s and told me Mom needs me to show up at this party.

Tad: She does.

Jamie: How can I -- how can I go to that jerk's house after what he did to mom? I want to smash his face in.

Tad: Shh, come here, come here, come here. Keep your voice down. Look, in the first place, what happened between your mother and Adam, okay, is private. It's none of our business. The second place, it's over. It was a mistake. It's done.

Jamie: It still happened. I can't pretend it didn’t. I can't even look at him.

Tad: All right, okay, okay, fine. You're going to act like this, you don't think that you can deal with it, then fine. Stay home, okay? Just bail. I'm sure your mother will understand.

Jamie: You didn't tell Mom I know about her and Adam?

Tad: No. And neither will you. Won't be necessary. The way your mother feels about this party right now, I'm sure she'll cut you some slack.

Jamie: Yeah, she will. I got to get dressed.

Tad: Oh, my God, I need medication. You just told me that you didn't want to go to the party. Now you're going to go?

Jamie: I have to for Mom. I mean, she was going on and on how happy she's going to be when I -- if I'm there.

Tad: Yeah, that's right. Happy. She doesn't want to watch you walking around all night moping.

Jamie: I'll be cool. Besides, she's had such a rough time lately. I don't want to add to it.

Tad: Yeah, well, so have you.

Jamie: But she got me through it, and I want to get her through it.

Tad: You know how proud I am of you, don't you?

Jamie: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just hope I don't see that creep tonight because I will smash his face in.

Brooke: What creep?

Marian: There you are, Liza. Winifred said you came up here to look for a crystal punch bowl. Darling, you didn't have to do that. You could have sent one of the servants.

Liza: No, I wasn't looking for the crystal punch bowl. I came up to get Colby’s suitcase.

Marian: Well, you're still going to take her away tonight, huh?

Liza: Yeah, Nother. If I don't do it tonight, Adam is going to force me out of her life, and I can't let that happen.

Marian: Liza, you are just guessing about them having an affair.

Liza: Adam is sleeping with my sister. And now she's even having a baby.

Marian: She is what?

Liza: She's carrying around this pregnancy test in her purse. And you know, Mother, people don't carry around pregnancy tests without them possibly being pregnant.

Marian: Oh, wait a minute, Liza. Are you sure you're not just putting two and two together too fast? Because I still find this very hard to believe.

Liza: I'm sure.

Marian: Oh, my God, Darling. No wonder you want to take Colby off to London. I am so sorry I ever brought that little tramp into your life.

Liza: Mother, this is not your fault. Mia has lied to all of us. But I am really going to need your help.

Marian: Anything, Darling.

Liza: I set aside a lot of Colby’s favorite clothes and her toys, and I put them under her bed. But if Adam sees me packing her bag, he's just --

Marian: I know. He'll catch on right away.

Liza: I just wouldn't be able to escape.

Marian: Look, I'll take all her things down to the gatehouse, and you two can leave from there. And that way we can say a proper goodbye to each other.

Liza: Thank you, Mother.

Marian: I'm so sorry, baby, that it had to end like this.

Liza: You know, I -- I think I knew, you know, deep in my heart that, with Adam, when things ended, they weren't going to be pretty.

Adam: So good to see you again.

Man: Thank you so much.

Adam: Wonderful outfit. I love it. Hello, my darling.

Woman: Hello.

Adam: You look beautiful tonight.

Woman: Why, thank you.

Adam: Yes.

Woman: You don't look too bad yourself.

Adam: Thank you, thank you. Hello, Charlotte.

Charlotte: Adam, how are you?

Adam: And Marcus. So good of you to come.

Marcus: My pleasure.

Adam: Yes, it's wonderful. You look heavenly, marvelous. Oh, excuse me. J.R. You look -- good.

J.R.: I feel like an -- I feel like an idiot.

Adam: Ah. Have you seen Liza? The guests are beginning to arrive. She should be here.

Winifred: Miss Marian went to find your wife.

Adam: Oh. Winifred, thank you.

J.R.: Do you know if Laurie’s here yet?

Winifred: I haven't seen her.

[Doorbell rings]

Adam: J.R., come over here a second. I want you to meet someone. Right out here.

Winifred: Please, come in, come in. Thank you. Please come in. There you are. Oh, Miss Laurie, Miss laurie, young Mr. Chandler was looking for you.

Laurie: He can't see me, not like this.

Cassie: There you are. Start serving.

Laurie: Can't I work in the kitchen, please?

Cassie: You're a waitress, not a cook. Circulate.

[Glass breaks]

Charlotte: Oh!

Marcus: Oh, gosh --

Laurie: It's okay, it's okay. It's fine. It's really fine.

J.R.: Is that you?

Laurie: It's okay. Thank you.

Liza: Mother --

Marian: What?

Liza: Colby's bear -- she can't sleep without it.

Marian: Okay. I'll see you later.

Adam: Liza, there you are. Where have you been? Why are you -- where are you going with Colby’s suitcase?

Brooke: Is somebody giving you a hard time, Honey?

Jamie: Nothing I can't handle.

Tad: [Italian accent] Hey, why don't you go upstairs and change your clothes, huh? We don't want to make your mother late for her big evening. And no smoking.

Jamie: Right.

Brooke: So, what was all that about?

Tad: [Normal voice] Nothing. He's just, you know, a teenager. Spelled m-o-o-d-Y. The good news is he'll be in a good mood again by the time we get to the party.

Brooke: Well, he was talking about some creep. Do you know who it is?

Tad: Nah, probably just some cretinous wretch at high school.

Brooke: Was it that kid who gave him a black eye? Should I talk to the principal about it?

Tad: No! Not unless you want him to suffer from terminal humiliation. He's a young man. He's got to fight his own battles.

Brooke: He shouldn't have to, Tad, if they're about me.

Tad: How do you figure it's about you?

Brooke: It was bad enough, all right, when he got into a fight defending me when I lied about Maria being alive. I cannot imagine how it would hurt him if he found out about me and Adam.

Tad: Well, he might surprise you.

Brooke: Thank God we won't have to find out. You know, I just want to get through tonight, and then I can put this whole fiasco behind me.

Laurie: It's okay.

J.R.: It's all right, folks. Everything's all right. Thank you. Thank you. Interesting costume. Is that what you were saving your money for?

Cassie: What happened here?

Laurie: J.R. --

Cassie: I am so sorry. You don't have to help clean up, Sir.

J.R.: I don't mind.

Cassie: What is going on with you tonight?

Laurie: It was an accident.

Cassie: Take 10 and pull it together. Any more accidents like this, and I'm out of business.

Laurie: Oh --

J.R.: She's a winner.

Laurie: She called me in to work at the last minute. I couldn't say no.

J.R.: She said take a break, right? I know just the place.

Liza: Well, Adam, you know that Stuart has the gallery opening this evening.

Adam: But why is he taking Colby’s suitcase? Doesn't he have one of his own?

Liza: Mother asked if Colby could sleep the night. She didn't want to feel lonely.

Marian: Well, it's more than that, Darling. I think the party's going to go so late, I thought Colby would sleep better at the gatehouse.

Adam: Well, fine. But I don't want her to miss the entire party. She's been so -- so excited about the costume that Mia picked out for her.

Colby: Mommy, Daddy, do you like my dress?

Adam: Oh. It's beautiful, it's beautiful.

Liza: I love your hair.

Adam: You're the prettiest girl at the whole party. Mia, you look ravishing.

Mia: Thank you.

Colby: I picked out the dress for Aunt Mia.

Adam: Oh, really? You two look like one of those mother/daughter portraits that Liza's always saying she would like to have taken.

Mia: Well, Colby insisted that I wear this dress, and I couldn't say no to her, could I?

Adam: Well, why don't I show you two off?

Mia: Okay.

Adam: Okay? Liza, you better get dressed. Your guests are waiting.

Marian: I had no idea Mia could be so cruel.

Liza: A dress doesn't make a mother. And she will never be Colby’s mother -- not as long as I have breath in my body.

Man: You got him, girl!

Woman: Takedown! Yeah!


Man: Get off me! Get off!

Kendall: Give up! Give up!

[Man screams]

Greenlee: You going to leave us alone? I can't hear you.

Man: Ow. You little --

Kendall: Oh, be nice, big man.

Man: Oh --

Aidan: You want to tell me what's going on here?

Trey: I don't know, but the girls are out for blood.

Aidan: And you're letting them? This is great, great.

Man: Whoo-hoo!

Aidan: Hey --

Man: Oh!

Kendall: What are you doing?

Man: What are you doing? I was just starting to have some fun.

Kendall: You pig --

Greenlee: I'll hurt you!

Trey: You don't want him to take legal action.

Man: All right, come on, come on. That's your fifth fight this week. You've been warned, Tiny.

Tiny: Oh, come on, now.

Man: Come on; get out of here before I call the cops.

Tiny: Hey, hey -- you babes want a rematch, I'm your man.

Kendall: Oh --

Woman: Way to go, girls!

Man: Drinks for the ladies!


Simone's voice: I already know everything I need to know about you.

Frank: If you knew everything there was to know about me, you'd probably hate my guts.

Frank: Hi. Yeah, it's me. I need your help.

Adam: I talked to my attorney just before the party. He's come up with several ironclad strategies to help your son.

Mia: Really?

Adam: Really.

Mia: Oh, you're the greatest. You really are the greatest. This is going to work out. I just know it. It has to.

Laurie: What is this place?

J.R.: It's private. It's a good way to escape the masses downstairs.

Laurie: I only have a 10 minute break.

J.R.: That should be enough time to tell me why you stood me up to play waitress.

Laurie: I'm not playing. This is my job, J.R. Cassie said if I didn't work, she's dumping me from the roster. I need the money.

J.R.: You could have called.

Laurie: I know. I guess I was just embarrassed.

J.R.: Why?

Laurie: Because I was supposed to be your date, and now I'm like your waitress.

J.R.: Well, at least you're here. We can still have a good time.

Laurie: I can’t. I have to get back to work.

J.R.: Maybe you don’t.

Aidan: You never cease to surprise me.

Kendall: Why, because I was in a brawl?

Aidan: Well, no, no. That doesn't surprise me. It's the fact that you're on the same side as -- how did you put it -- "a backstabbing psycho."

Kendall: Yeah, well, Greenlee got in over her head again, and I bailed her out again. Not that she'd ever notice.

Aidan: But she was there when you tried to save her job at Giovanna.

Kendall: Yeah, but she -- she's still accusing me of trying to push her out, and Trey believes her. Some brother he is. I keep his butt out of jail. He should be sticking up for me.

Aidan: You know, I think someone needs to set them straight.

Kendall: Forget it. They won't listen.

Trey: Seeing you and Kendall take down that Neanderthal like that -- now, that's something I never thought I'd see in this lifetime.

Greenlee: He was trying to strangle her, which I prefer to do myself.

Trey: Oh, come on. Even Tiny has to admit that you and Kendall make a pretty good team.

Greenlee: Yeah, she's a good second in a bar fight. All that backstabbing she does at the office comes in handy.

Aidan: You know, I heard that, and I think you're wrong. Kendall wasn't trying to do you in. She was trying to help you keep your job.

Greenlee: What business is that of yours?

Aidan: Well, I care about Kendall. She saved my job at the Valley Inn, and she tried to save yours at Giovanna. And I saw that, and I saw her stick her neck out for you.

Trey: Actually, she went to the mat for me, too. You remember, she wouldn't give up that confession I wrote?

Greenlee: You really don't want to remind me of that.

Trey: I know, I know, but I'm just saying that she covered for me with the D.A.

Aidan: Yeah, and she covered for you, too.

Greenlee: Even if she did, she screwed it up. Now we're both out of a job, and tomorrow we'll be in competition for a new one.

Trey: Not necessarily. I think I have an idea.

Trey: See, I was thinking that you and Kendall should join forces, right? Start a business. Look, you've got the brains and the cash and she's got the tenacity.

Aidan: That might work.

Kendall: What might work?

Aidan: How would you like to stop taking orders from Petey Cortlandt?

Trey: And not take orders from anyone.

Kendall: What are you guys talking about?

Aidan: Well, Trey here was just talking about how you and little Miss Trust Fund here should go into business together.

Greenlee and Kendall: I'd die first.

J.R.: What would you give to hang out with me tonight instead of working?

Laurie: I'd give my last dime, but I already spent it on my costume.

J.R.: Which you can't wear because you're in this uniform.

Laurie: It's called the real world. I come from a completely different place than you, J.R. I have to work for money. Nobody gives me any.

J.R.: How much were you supposed to get paid tonight?

Laurie: Not sure, exactly. Why?

J.R.: Well, you're supposed to earn money, so how about instead of the catering company paying you, I pay you?

Laurie: What? Put that away.

J.R.: I'll pay you twice what they were going to.

Laurie: That's it. I'm so out of here.

J.R.: Laurie, wait.

Frank: Yeah, Mom. No, no, you're right. That's why I called. You know where my head was back then. I just hope that I'm not still that guy. Yes, yes, I know what I have to do, and I will. Thank you. I love you. Okay. Ahem.

Frank: Myrtle, hi. It's Frank. How you doing? Yeah, is Simone there? Oh, she did? Okay. Any idea when she's going to be back? No, no message. This is something that I have to tell her in person.

Simone: Oh. The place looks amazing. Thank you so much, Susan.

Mia: Simone, hi.

Simone: Oh, Mia, hi.

Mia: You look gorgeous.

Simone: Oh, thank you.

Mia: Beautiful. So, is Frank with you?

Simone: Oh, no, he had to work.

Mia: Oh. I'm sorry.

Simone: Yeah.

Mia: Well, enjoy yourself.

Simone: Oh, thank you. I'll see you?

Mia: Okay. Yeah.

Brooke: Well.

Jamie: Do you see Joni?

Brooke: Honey, I don't know what she looks like. You'll have to introduce us.

Jamie: Right.

Brooke: I can tell you one thing -- she's a very lucky young woman because she's with the most handsome guy in the room.

Jamie: Thanks, Mom.

Brooke: Go on. Staying home and doing laundry looks really good right now.

Tad: Just relax, okay? Have a drink. Have fun. It'll all be over before you know it.

Brooke: I wish.

Adam: Yes, born and raised in Pigeon Hollow. You've heard of Pigeon Hollow, of course.

Woman: No, I've never heard of Pigeon Hollow.

Adam: Never heard of Pigeon Hollow? Oh, the capitol of West Virginia, practically. The hub of the coal mining industry -- at least in the United States.

Liza: Oh, thank you.

Man: Mr. Chandler, how about a shot of this happy family. Move a little closer, please.

Mia: All right.

Man: Yes. Ah, that's it. Smile. I can't resist. One more, one more. Okay, two more.

>> On the next "All My Children" --

Kendall: You eloped.

Joni: You've been drinking?

Tad: You've really outdone yourself this time.

Frank: I haven't been honest with you.

Jake: I've waited my entire life for this moment.

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