All My Children Transcript Wednesday 7/3/02
>> Previously on "All My Children" --
Brooke: I have to go back to Nevada. I have to make sure that Maureen is not Maria.
Edmund: This is Edmund Grey. Hello?
Ryan: I'm getting married tonight.
Kendall: I'm going to go plant the stupid bug and get the proof that I need. This is my one shot to save myself.
Trey: I have reason to believe that there's going to be a break-in at the Enchantment headquarters tonight.
Fran's voice: You could help a baby boy who's losing his life. Please, call these people.
Hayley: Tim gets into town today, you know?
>> Due to the temporary absence of Mark Consuelos, the role of Mateo will be played by Kurt Caceras.
Mateo: We really lucked out.
Hayley: Yeah, no kidding.
Edmund: I know. We all expected a blood relative of yours to match.
Hayley: Listen, cousin by marriage is fine by us.
Mateo: Whatever works.
Nurse: Mr. and Mrs. Santos?
Nurse: There's a lady on the phone about Enzo and the donor search.
Hayley: Oh, thank God we have Tim now.
Mateo: You want to tell her "Thanks, but no thanks," or should I?
Edmund: Why don't I save you both the trouble, ok?
Hayley: Yeah, thanks.
Nurse: Just push line 5.
Mateo: So, Tim didn't say when his plane was getting in?
Hayley: Uh-uh, but I'm sure he'll call us from the airport.
Tim: Do you know where I can find the OR.?
Mateo: Second floor, just follow the signs.
Tim: Thanks. I've got this hunk of liver I'm trying to unload.
Hayley: Hey, Timmy! I can't believe it!
Tim: Hey, whoa, they're going to have to treat me for broken ribs.
Hayley: Oh, tough.
Tim: And either you call me Tim, or I rag on you about your old kabuki Goth look.
Hayley: Uh, deal.
Edmund: I'm in no mood for practical jokes, especially about this.
Liza: Rod, reel, floats. Float. Oh, Stuart can explain this to me. Oh, oh, oh, Mia. Could I ask you a favor?
Mia: Sure. What do you need?
Liza: Colby's bluebell troop is going on a fishing trip. Adam's going, but I don't really feel up to it.
Mia: I bet it'll be fun.
Liza: Well, maybe you can stand in for me. Colby's a little afraid of the water, and you're the swimmer in the family.
Mia: Um -- you know, I don't really know how I feel about crashing in on a father/daughter, you know, quality bonding time.
Liza: God, I feel like my idiotic jealously has ruined your relationship with all of us.
Mia: No, no, no, it hasn't, it hasn't.
Liza: Then don't let me make you feel uncomfortable about spending time with my husband. I trust you both.
Mia: I know. We settled that.
Liza: I need something else from you, too.
Mia: What's that?
Liza: I need you to give me back my bankbooks.
Adam: I want a full report on Liza's every move.
Trey: Look, Mr. Chandler, I'm an attorney, not a private investigator.
Adam: You'll be well compensated.
Trey: Well, it's not about the money. My duty is to act in the best interest of the clients I already have.
Adam: Oh, save the act, kid. See, I know who you really are.
Ryan: Kendall? If you're hiding because you're trying on your wedding dress -- nothing's going to bring us bad luck, so I'm coming in. I'm coming in.
Chris' voice: Hi, this is Chris Stamp. Tell me what I need to know, and I'll get back to you.
Ryan: Hey, Chris, it's Ryan. Listen, I -- I know things have been kind of rough between us lately, but I thought maybe you'd like to stand by when I say "I do," even though it's to Kendall. Listen, the wedding's only in a couple hours. I hope you get this message in time. Ok.
Aidan: It's a simple question.
Kendall: What am I doing here? Guess.
Aidan: Look, I'm not in the mood for games.
Kendall: Oh, that's too bad because I have some good ones. Ok, so, you busted me. So I'm a bad girl.
Aidan: That I know, but just how bad?
Kendall: You weren't supposed to be here for a while.
Aidan: I told people that, hoping whoever swiped the passkey would use it, and here you are.
Kendall: You're even sexier when you're outraged. Who you calling?
Aidan: You know, I think it's your turn to guess.
Kendall: Don't be mean.
Aidan: First I'm going to call security, and then I'm going to call Ms. Kane. I wonder how she'll take it, you breaking and entering.
Kendall: You don't want to do that. Ok, ok, so I swiped the keycard, but not for any nefarious purpose. I wanted to surprise you.
Aidan: Yeah, you did a bit.
Kendall: I thought that maybe if you opened the door and saw me standing there in a hardhat, a smile, and nothing else, things might heat up a little bit.
Aidan: It's an interesting story.
Kendall: But are you interested on the follow-through?
Aidan: Why here, though, Kendall? Why me? We're neighbors in a motel.
Kendall: Haven't you ever had a romantic encounter at the workplace? It can be extremely titillating.
Aidan: Yeah, and you're working pretty hard.
Kendall: Well, then, let's see how well we work together.
Aidan: Why not?
Mateo: Man, are we glad to see you.
Hayley: Oh, I can't believe it. You are so handsome and taller and older-looking.
Tim: Yeah, and you look so --
Hayley: Watch it.
Mateo: Tim, are you really ok with all this? I mean, it's truly voluntary, right?
Hayley: Yeah, Uncle Trevor didn't force you into this, did he?
Tim: No, hey, I'm cool, but I'm not going to take any chances.
Mateo: Oh, my God.
Hayley: You're so sick.
Mateo: That's some good confidence in your surgeon, Tim.
Jake: All right, so why do I got the feeling this is Tim Dillon?
Tim: Hi, Jake.
Jake: Hey, man. Good to see you. You're all grown up, huh?
Mateo: Jake, we want to make sure that he knows everything that could happen before he decides to do this.
Jake: Yeah, well, to start with, you could donate your own blood before the operation.
Tim: My liver's not enough? You want my blood, too?
Jake: Well, actually, if you choose to donate, then if we have to transfuse you, we can use your blood in case there's any complications.
Mateo: And what else?
Jake: Well, with any operation, there's risk of infection.
Tim: But that's rare, right?
Jake: Yeah, it's unusual, but it can happen.
Tim: So can alien abductions, but they don't scare me, either.
Hayley: Oh, see, you're making a huge sacrifice for us and we appreciate it.
Tim: Oh, it's not that big of a deal.
Mateo: It is to us.
Tim: Bring on the laughing gas and let's roll.
Jake: Tim, hang on a sec here. I want to make sure that you know you're rush-- you're racing off to the OR here. Do you have any questions that I can answer for you?
Tim: How long am I going to be in the hospital?
Jake: About five days.
Tim: When I get out, will I be able to catch a 50-yard spiraling pass on the run?
Jake: I'm sure you can once you recuperate.
Tim: Cool. I could never catch one before.
Jake: Anything else?
Tim: Yeah, I want Enzo to be well again, like yesterday.
Mateo: Thanks, man. Thank you.
Liza: Thanks, Stuart. You know, I didn't even know what half the things on the list were. Ok, I'll see you soon.
Mia: You know, I can take care of whatever business you need. The transfer of funds, whatever.
Liza: You've really done more than enough, and I'm so grateful. Trey will take care of the rest.
Mia: Are you sure?
Liza: Yeah. Oh, I got to get this money back where it belongs, and that way, you know, Adam won't even know where it went or what I was planning on doing with it. This can't be the right total. Mia, what happened to the rest of the money?
Mia: I took it.
Trey: I'm sorry, sir. I don't understand.
Adam: Well, let me elucidate. Your cover's blown. I got the goods on you.
Trey: Mr. Chandler, my plate's already full.
Adam: You're new in town, Kenyon. Rule number one -- there's always time to do whatever Adam Chandler needs done.
Trey: My first allegiance is to my clients, Vanessa Cortlandt and Kendall Hart.
Adam: What is with your penchant for representing deceitful, guilty women?
Trey: Well, not guilty until proven otherwise.
Adam: I'm going to leave one deceitful woman off your list. That would be my devoted wife, Liza.
Trey: You do of course understand that there are confidentiality issues. I can't discuss Liza with you. Otherwise, it would be an honor to work for a man of your stature.
Adam: Come on, kid, you can suck up better than that, can't you?
Trey: Well, sir, it would be a direct conflict of interest.
Adam: Oh, I'm compromising your ethics. May Oliver Wendell Holmes forgive me. Ok, you made all the right outraged noises. Now name your price.
Trey: Sir, there is no price.
Adam: I'm not bluffing. I don't bluff. I'm trying to do this nicely, pretending that you have a choice. I find it makes people more cooperative, but you can't be so misguided as to think you can actually reject my proposal.
Trey: Mr. Chandler, I've given you my answer. There's no way I can accept this job.
Adam: So be it.
Trey: Otherwise -- it's not personal. I would be happy to work for you, but --
Adam: You'd be wiser to form a healthy fear of me, Kenyon.
Trey: Mr. Chandler, are we through?
Adam: No, the question is, are you through? Fascinating stuff, this.
Trey: What is that?
Adam: It's the result of one investigator's diligence. Question is what to do with it. Could fax it right over to the Bar Association or the local authorities -- Jackson Montgomery would know how to do the most damage with it -- or a copy or two to your psychotic clients, Vanessa and Kendall. Oh, that should be interesting.
Trey: Sir, are you threatening me with sabotaging my practice?
Adam: Oh, no, no, no, nothing of the sort. I just think your clients should know who's representing them. After all, you have their lives in your hands.
Trey: Well, my record speaks for itself, and my conduct has been exemplary.
Adam: Trey Kenyon's life was inspiring, his record spotless. Until that tragic boating accident. Now here I think I could say, "if you don't do what I say, you're a dead man." Although that would be redundant, wouldn't it? And unfortunately for you, I'm not about to let you rest in peace.
Tim: Man, a few years away from Pine Valley, and it's like you need Cliff Notes to catch up.
Hayley: It's a happening town.
Mateo: So what's going on with you and the Dillon clan?
Tim: Our status is pretty quo.
Edmund: Tim, good to see you.
Tim: Hey, Mr. Grey.
Edmund: No, please, call me Edmund. How's everything going?
Tim: All systems are go, Edmund.
Mateo: Hey, Tim, why don't you and Hayley keep playing some catch-up while I ask Edmund something.
Tim: So if we're not going to be slicing and dicing right away, you think maybe we can get a snack?
Hayley: Sure. Still same old bottomless pit that you've always been?
Tim: Hey, I'm just trying to keep my liver healthy.
Mateo: What is it? Phone call?
Edmund: I just can't believe who that was.
Liza: Why would you take money out of these accounts? I mean, how could you need that much?
Mia: If I could've gotten it any other way, I --
Liza: You could've just come to me. How many times have I offered you money, and you've always turned me down.
Mia: I should've told you. I don't know why I waited until now to tell you.
Liza: Your son's adoptive parents needed help, is that it? And I'm so caught up with my own illness and everything that there was some imaginary affair I -- I mean, you couldn't come to me. Is William sick? Is it a relapse?
Mia: No, no, he's ok now. I should've -- so much has been going on, and I just -- I don't want to add to your burden, Liza.
Liza: You're not adding to anything. It would not worry me to have you come to me with your problems. Mia, I'm not as delicate as you think I am.
Mia: You're too good to me, really.
Liza: Mia, you can come to me with anything. You can come to me anytime with anything, ok?
Liza: Now, look, don't worry about the money. I will find a way to replace it, and Trey will take care of the rest.
Adam: This sort of document isn't rare, but the subject makes it unique.
Trey: Could I take a look at that, please?
Adam: Yes. So few people have a chance to see their own death certificates. You look like you've seen a ghost.
Trey: This -- this thing again. It keeps turning up.
Adam: Oh, really?
Trey: Yeah. Yeah, this guy has caused me a hell of a lot of trouble.
Adam: Are you telling me that there's -- there actually is another James H. Kenyon III, Esquire, walking this earth?
Trey: Well, you know what they say -- truth is indeed stranger than fiction.
Adam: You know what I say? Give it up, kid. You're outplayed and outclassed.
Trey: Well, sir, you've been, obviously, a victim of a hoax.
Adam: No, the only one perpetrating a hoax here is you. The only Bar you ever passed sold watered-down drinks.
Trey: No, that's not --
Adam: You are vermin. Vermin, my friend, but not the usual lawyer variety. Trey Kenyon drowned shortly after he passed his Bar Exam. Poor kid -- all that work for nothing.
Trey: What you're suggesting -- nobody could get away with that.
Adam: And you haven't gotten away with it. That's why I own you.
Trey: Nobody owns me, Mr. Chandler.
Adam: Really? Well, let's not quibble about semantics, but one thing I am curious about -- you're not playing this role just for the legal fees. You have, I think, something else in mind. What are you really after?
Kendall: Um -- you don't have to search me or my bag. Look, what do I have to do to convince you?
Aidan: You can start by showing me what you're hiding.
Kendall: Aren't you going to help?
Aidan: It's your show.
Kendall: If that's how you like it.
Kendall: That's just what I've waited for. No!
Aidan: Hey, what are you trying to pull?
Kendall: No, I have to -- no -- no, I have to go! Please, please, let me go!
Officer: You're not going nowhere.
Kendall: No, please let me -- I have to go. You've got to let me go.
Trey: Is it necessary that you know every detail of your employees' lives?
Adam: Not as long as my employees do their jobs well.
Trey: We'll leave it at that, then.
Adam: Feel free to hang on to that. It's a copy.
Trey: Thank you. Ok. Now, how can I be of service to you?
Adam: Ah. Yes, I need information.
Trey: About your wife, but I don't have any.
Adam: My wife has you juggling a sizable amount of my company's money. Don't bother to deny it. I saw you and Mia trying to hide the bankbooks from me.
Trey: It seems that you know as much about this as I do. Why do you need me?
Adam: Because you're positioned to learn much more than I can.
Trey: Well, if you're out for blood, why don't you just expose Liza for her theft? Go public?
Adam: No. That wouldn't do it. I suffered when I thought my wife was going to die. I thought I was going to lose a woman who loved me as much or possibly more than I loved her. Exposing her as an embezzler doesn't even approach payback.
Trey: She really had you going, huh?
Adam: She put on a show of love and devotion while shuffling her escape fund. My wife wants to take my daughter away from me. I will see her in hell first.
Trey: Of course I will help in any way I can.
Adam: Of course you will, but if you let one word of our agreement out to anyone, I'm going to send you to hell right along with her.
Trey: Sir, I can assure you that I'm on your side.
Adam: Good. Now let's give you your first assignment. We'll start with an easy one.
Edmund: It was Laura.
Mateo: Brooke asked her to help us out. Laura's transplant support group had lots of contacts. Whatever she said, Edmund, it's ok. We got our donor.
Edmund: Brooke told me she was going out of town to visit Laura. Laura says she doesn't know anything about it.
Mateo: Are you sure?
Edmund: Why would Brooke lie to me?
Mateo: Edmund, this is Brooke we're talking about. It's got to be a surprise or something for you. I mean, if she told you where she was headed, would've spoiled it.
Hayley: Yes. There he is. Look who it is. Timmy, this is your cousin Enzo. Enzo, this is your hero, Tim.
Tim: Hey, bud. Look what I got.
Hayley: Look at that.
Tim: Yeah? I think he likes me.
Hayley: Oh, he's just buttering you up.
Tim: Seriously, Hayley, whose kid is he? He looks way too cute to be yours.
Hayley: Ha-ha-ha. He has plenty of my fine qualities.
Tim: Such as?
Hayley: Such as my naturally blond hair. Just kidding. He's got my wonderful fashion sense and he's very generous, and when he finds something he wants, he doesn't let go.
Tim: You're lucky Dad's not around. He'd probably give the kid some freaky nickname.
Hayley: That's true. There's no escaping Pork Chop's private language.
Tim: What do you say, huh, Lamb Chop? Churchill Cheeks.
Hayley: Oh, stop it. He's a big boy. You want to hold him?
Tim: Ok, and I'll hold on him better than I do a football.
Hayley: It's all up to you now.
Tim: Hey. Oh, don't sweat it, Enzo. The upside is that I'm on your team now. Know what that means? You're going to be one healthy kid real soon. Yeah, you can take that to the bank. The downside is that you're going to have a hunk of my liver in you. Now, if that makes you anything like me, you're going to be one clumsy little dude.
Mateo: Brooke's probably hiding out someplace, decorating the perfect little cottage for a honeymoon place or something.
Nurse: There's another call for you about Enzo.
Mateo: Oh, thank you. I'll field this one.
Nurse: Line 4.
Mateo: Thank you. Hello, this is Mateo Santos. My wife and I really appreciate you contacting us about our son, but we've already got a donor. Enzo's going to be ok. Hello? Are you there?
Maria: Yeah, that's really good news. Congratulations.
Mateo: Who -- who is this? Hello?
Mateo: Are you there? Hello? Hello? Hello?
[Knock on door]
Chris: Got your message, son. You just tell me where and when the ceremony is, and I'm there for you.
Ryan: Never. Never. The wedding is not going to happen! I'm out of here tonight.
Hayley: Hey, Mateo. Your son couldn't wait, so Deborah put him down for his nap.
Mateo: Did you guys hit it off? You still want to go through with that transplant?
Tim: Hey, I'm willing to give it a shot, but Enzo's a little afraid he'll inherit my sports ineptness.
Hayley: It's not a deal-breaker, believe me. Who was on the phone, hon?
Mateo: Somebody calling about the transplant. I don't know. She didn't give her name.
Hayley: What's the problem?
Mateo: Something about her voice. It sounded familiar. I want to make sure that our son hasn't bitten Deborah again, all right?
Hayley: Oh, wait. He's not a cannibal. He just likes to bite people when he's being put down for his naps.
Tim: Yeah, I'll remember that. You guys go on ahead. I got to check in with Dad.
Hayley: Ok. Give him my love.
Mateo: And tell your parents not to worry. You'll be back in a week.
Tim: Hey, Dad, it's me. Yeah, everything's super. Yeah, Enzo's gung-ho about getting part of my liver. Don't sweat it -- I kind of sidestepped the whole Janet subject. Yeah. Ok, yeah. Totally. Take care of her, and I can keep them in the dark. Ok, but one other thing -- I'm going to have to stay longer than five days. Yeah, for about a month.
Liza: I just want to get this money back where it belongs.
Mia: Have you and Trey decided when that'll happen?
Liza: No, not exactly. In fact, I thought I would've heard from him, you know, before now.
Mia: Maybe you ought to try another lawyer.
Liza: You think he's good, don't you?
Mia: He's just handling a lot. You know, he's representing Vanessa Cortlandt in that whole Proteus mess, and now he's defending Kendall Hart, too.
Liza: Yeah, true. I mean, I know he's busy, but I have already shared with him this indiscretion, and I can't risk talking anybody else. I can't go to another attorney.
Adam: Hello, ladies.
Liza: Oh, Adam, I'm so glad you're home.
Adam: Really? Are you? You know, if I didn't know better, I would think that the two most beautiful women I know were hiding something from me.
Chris: Ryan, why don't you slow down. Wait, just -- why? Why are you leaving?
Ryan: You were right about Kendall. You were right about her.
Chris: What happened?
Ryan: It's really not worth getting into.
Chris: Did she confess?
Ryan: No. No, no, this is not about the fire.
Chris: Ryan -- Ryan, look, I wish it hadn't come down to this. I wish I could do something to spare you the pain right now.
Ryan: Well, in a way, you did, really.
Chris: What do you mean?
Ryan: While I was looking for you, I found Kendall -- well, I found out that she was not worth marrying.
Chris: Ryan, you don't have to leave. Your family's here. I'm here.
Ryan: No, I really need to do this. I need a fresh start someplace else.
Chris: Where are you going?
Ryan: Well, I guess I'm going to find that out when I get there.
Chris: Well, when you do get there, would you tell your dad?
Ryan: No, I was -- I wasn't going to leave without telling you. I'm glad you came by.
Chris: Same here.
Ryan: You know, who knows? Maybe in a little while I'll cool down, and then maybe six months from now or so I'll be back.
Chris: Maybe you'll find a town that fits you. Maybe you can find a woman who can give you the things that you need.
Ryan: Well, I could always come visit -- I mean, you know, sometime down the road.
Chris: Yeah, sure.
Ryan: I know how to get in touch with you, so --
Chris: Ryan, look -- look, I'm new at this -- this father thing. Is there something I'm supposed to know to say or what to do that's going to make you change your mind?
Ryan: No. Dad, just -- just wish me good luck.
Chris: Good luck, son.
Chris: Good luck.
Kendall: What, are the cops in Pine Valley on Erica Kane's payroll now?
Officer: You think you're going to make points with me this way?
Kendall: She has security guards. Why are police officers roaming around an empty space?
Officer: It's not empty. All right, he's got a reason for being here. What about you?
Kendall: Why should I tell you?
Officer: Because we got a report of a possible breaking and entering.
Kendall: I was just visiting him.
Officer: You practically knocked me down trying to get out of here. What's the hurry?
Kendall: Please, I wasn't doing anything illegal. Can we just discuss this later?
Kendall: Please, I have to see somebody now. My life depends on it. Please, I have to see someone now.
Officer: All right, all right, let's take this down to the station house. We'll finish it there.
Aidan: Officer, Officer, she's not a burglar. She's a designer on this project.
Officer: Why didn't you tell me?
Aidan: Because she's -- all day, she's been the biggest pain in the rear.
Officer: Well, pay her back in your own time, buddy. I got more important things to do. Go on, get out of here.
Hayley: Ugh, Mateo. You know, we have real food at home if you're hungry.
Tim: Oh, this is just a snack. Look, genuine corn in these chips, and this candy bar's got minerals and junk in it. I'm taking care of myself for Enzo.
Hayley: You know, you're a saint for doing this. You really are.
Jake: Hey, how about some tests?
Tim: Ah, you bet. Can I keep on eating?
Jake: Why not?
Hayley: I will go with you and hang out by the vending machines in case you run out of chips.
Mateo: I think I'll hang out here.
Jake: Ok. All right, let's go do it.
Hayley: Don't leave without me, ok?
Mateo: I won't. Did you track down Brooke?
Edmund: No luck.
Jake: Listen, Mateo, we'll be up on the third floor when you want to join us.
Mateo: All right, thanks.
Jake: Edmund, it looks like Mom and I are going to be part of Jamie's cheering squad at tomorrow's game.
Edmund: Oh. I thought Tad had that covered.
Jake: No, no, he had to go out of town. Some emergency. See you up there.
Liza: Hiding something from you? I think my paranoia is contagious. Tell him, Mia.
Mia: Well, there's no plot that I know of.
Adam: I was just kidding.
Mia: I think I'm going to track down my favorite niece.
Liza: Yeah, herd her toward the bathtub if you don't mind.
Mia: Will do.
Adam: Did Mia seem glad to get away?
Liza: I didn't notice.
Adam: Well, I suppose it'll take her some time to get over it.
Adam: Being accused of betraying you with me.
Liza: Well, I would do anything to take that back.
Adam: Can you imagine how much I -- or any husband -- would have to loathe and despise his wife to take her sister to bed?
Liza: Well, it's a disgusting idea, Adam.
Adam: Yes. Yes, it's hard to imagine you doing anything so horrible as to drive me to that.
Trey: Liza, it's Trey.
Liza: Oh, hello. How's everything going?
Trey: We've hit a snag in the money transfer.
Liza: Really? What's that?
Trey: I'm going to need to see the bankbooks and a map of the money trail, so I can prove that it's clean.
Liza: Well, I don't think that should be a problem. Um -- I'll get everything to you as soon as I can. Bye.
Adam: Anyone I know?
Liza: No, just some R & D details.
Adam: They shouldn't bother you at home.
Liza: I don't mind.
Adam: Chandler Enterprises is just as lucky to have you as I am.
Kendall: Ryan! Ryan! Ryan, baby -- baby, please just let me -- baby -- where -- oh. I'll find him. I'll find him, I'll find him. I'll make him understand I just -- I just did this to win in court. He has to believe me.
Kendall: He can't be gone. He can't be gone. He's not gone. Oh, no. Ryan. Ryan, no! Ryan, don't go! Ryan! Ryan, no! No, Ryan! Ryan, no! No! Ryan! Ryan, no! It's not what you thought! Ryan -- Ryan, no, come back! Ryan, no! No! It's not what you thought! No!
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Leo: Today is Independence Day, and we will be free even if it kills me.
Mary: You about to sweep me off my feet again?
Liza: Whatever it is that you think you're doing, stop it, or I will make you regret it.