All My Children Transcript Tuesday 6/11/02
>> Previously on "All My Children" --
Mateo: You're a match?
Arlene: I couldn't believe it myself.
Hayley: She's going to save Enzo.
Mateo: We got to make sure your liver's in good enough shape to donate.
Arlene: Well, it's in great shape. I haven't had a drop in months.
Erica: How could you do this to me?
Chris: You had no right to read this letter.
Erica: You are the one who got caught cheating!
Ryan: You just got a letter from my mom?
Chris: Everything that we've believed -- it's all been a lie.
Mateo: So, Doc, now that Enzo has a donor, the transplant's a go, right?
Dr. Conway: Mr. Santos, your mother-in-law is a blood match, but we need to run some more tests, establish that the liver is compatible before we proceed.
Mateo: Okay. How long is that going to take?
Dr. Conway: I will let you know as soon as the reports come back.
Edmund: How's it going?
Mateo: Tests, more tests. I mean --
Edmund: Mateo, it'll work out, okay? Arlene's health is good and she hasn't had a drink in -- what, she said months?
Mateo: Yeah. Let's hope she's telling the truth.
Hayley: Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Arlene: How long does it take to test a liver, anyhow?
Hayley: Mom, please chill. It's going to be fine. You'll be a match.
Arlene: I'm not worried about that, Sweetie. It's just -- well, after the surgery, how am I going to take care of myself all alone in a hotel room?
Stuart: Well, listen, you -- you could come and stay with me and Marian. We'll take care of you.
Arlene: You're a sweetie, but I was thinking it'd be nice to be with Hayley and the baby while I get back on my feet.
Hayley: Oh. I'll run it by Mateo, but I'm sure since you're saving his son's life, he'll be cool with it.
Mateo: Cool with what?
Ryan: Put it away.
Chris: Read it.
Ryan: You know what? I've filed away enough info on my mom to last me a lifetime.
Chris: I know how you feel, Ryan. But as it turns out, most of the stuff that you've -- or most of what I've fed you has been bogus, it's been wrong. Bottom line is your mother loved me and she loved you, Ryan, very, very much.
Waiter: Ms. Kane?
Waiter: The front desk called. Your things have been moved from Mr. Stamp's room to another suite, as you requested.
Erica: Has Mr. Stamp been told?
Waiter: As far as I know, he hasn't returned to the hotel this evening.
Kendall: Drinking alone, Mother? Must mean trouble in paradise.
Hayley: Honey, we were just thinking that Mom might need a place to recuperate after the transplant surgery.
Arlene: And Hayley might need another pair of helping hands.
Mateo: So you think that bunking with us, we could all sort of take care of each other?
Arlene: That's a real nice way of putting it, yeah.
Hayley: Is it okay?
Mateo: She's family. She can stay with us.
Stuart: You see? Life works out if you just let it.
Arlene: I won't be any trouble, I promise.
Mateo: You're acting like this is a done deal. Did we get the tests back?
Hayley: No, not yet, but really soon.
Arlene: It's a good thing I'm off the sauce. This kind of pressure could send a person headfirst into a fifth of vodka.
Stuart: You know, when I -- when I get worried about stuff, you know what? You know, I always think about ice cream. You know, a big -- why don't you and I go down to the cafeteria and get a couple of great big ice cream sundaes. My treat.
Arlene: I don't think that's going to do it for me, Stuart.
Hayley: Mom, don't worry. You're his grandma. Your blood type's a match and your liver's going to be a perfect match. You'll see.
Arlene: I think I'm going to put a rush on those test results.
Stuart: I'll -- I'll go with you. Don't worry. I know how important this liver is to little Enzo, and I'll --
Stuart: I'll make sure no alcohol gets anywhere near her. Bye-bye.
Hayley: Don't worry. She knows what's at stake here. She wouldn't do anything to jeopardize Enzo's liver.
Mateo: You'll keep an eye on her, just as a precaution.
Stuart: Okay. I'll tie this on her wrist so I don't lose her.
Mateo: Shh, shh, shh.
Arlene: Yeah, you. Who do I talk to about getting lab test results?
Nurse: Patient's name?
Arlene: Arlene Vaughan and Lorenzo Santos. The tests were ordered by Dr. Conway.
Nurse: I'll see what I can find out.
Arlene: Thanks. Hurry back.
Arlene: Hi. Front desk? Hi, this is Arlene Vaughan. I checked out this morning. I left some bags behind the front desk there, and I was wondering if you could hang on to them for a little while longer. Thanks. You're a peach.
Edmund: Hey. Moving out of the Valley Inn?
Arlene: Hey. Well, yeah. Hayley thought I'd be more comfy with her and the baby at the condo.
Edmund: Well, that makes sense. Yeah. Having family around, you know, during a time of crisis is just the support that Hayley and Mateo need right now.
Arlene: I could use a little support myself, something cool and smooth.
Stuart: Arlene, hi. Did you change your mind about the ice cream sundaes yet?
Arlene: Oh, Stuart. You're a hard man to say no to.
Brooke: Sorry, no cream, just that sort of powdery stuff. What's up?
Edmund: Oh. Watching Arlene is like watching a ticking time bomb.
Brooke: Pressure of holding Lorenzo’s life in her hands getting to her?
Edmund: I don't care about that. If she has a drink, she doesn't just hurt herself, she hurts Enzo.
Stuart: Other than fried egg sandwiches, ice cream sundaes are my specialty. Are you a with or without nuts person?
Arlene: Stuart, look, you don't have to do this.
Stuart: Do what?
Arlene: Hold my hand and babysit me. I mean, I'm not going to blow Enzo's chances by going off on a binge.
Stuart: You promise?
Arlene: Yeah, I promise. Now, look, I'm a little shaky, but that's just because I'm worried about our little guy.
Stuart: Oh, I am so glad. I'm so glad. When Liza was sick -- you weren't here when Liza was sick --
Arlene: Look, I --
Stuart: Marian got so upset --
Arlene: I'm not going to be like that, Stuart. Now, tell you what -- how about you go down to the cafeteria, whip us up a couple of great hot fudge sundaes, and I'm going to go splash a little water on my face, all right?
Stuart: Okay, you'll be right down?
Stuart: Okay, bye. I'll see you in a minute.
Arlene: Hey, are those my test results?
Nurse: Yeah. I was just walking them over to --
Nurse: Wait a minute.
Chris: Everything your mom did was because that -- that SOB who you thought was your father forced her to do it. Your mom -- she didn't ditch me, Ryan. That lowlife -- he kidnapped your brother and your mother at gunpoint. He forced her, he made her give up the goods on me and blow my cover.
Ryan: No, she could have -- she could have just made it up.
Chris: No, no, no, no. At that point -- Ryan, listen to me. At that point, she had no choice. Son, she was on survival mode.
Ryan: "Survival mode"? What happened after she got kidnapped? What happened after she had me? Why didn't she tell you you had a son?
Chris: Because that bum threatened to kill her if she ever tried to hook up with me again. Patrick killed her spirit, but he never could kill her love for me. You understand? And after all those years, up until the day she died, she kept me in her heart.
Ryan: I'm glad for you. But your claim that she loved me, too -- that's just a little bit too much. I don't care what that letter says, love was the last thing that she ever showed me.
Chris: I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. You -- you read the letter. And after you finish reading it, if you feel the same way, Ryan, the subject's closed and I'll never bring it up again.
Kendall: Well, now I get why Chris showed up at the Pine Cone looking all hot and bothered -- you guys are on the outs.
Erica: Is that why you're here, Kendall -- to gloat?
Kendall: Check your ego at the front door, Mother. I had no idea you'd be here drowning your sorrows in designer bottled water.
Erica: Well, I find that a little hard to believe. I mean, you have certainly had a ringside seat every time I've taken a hit. First the trial, then the fire, of course, and now this. It's what you live for, isn't it, Kendall?
Erica: Well, if that's what you came for, get a good look.
Kendall: Hey, it's not my fault a guy finally woke up and saw through the flash and dazzle to the real Erica.
Erica: And what would that be?
Kendall: A taker, totally incapable of giving anything to anyone except for your own little precious Bianca. God knows you never gave me anything -- unless you want to count rejection, hatred, disgust.
Erica: I gave you life.
Brooke: You know, Edmund, Arlene might surprise us all.
Edmund: How so?
Brooke: "How so?" Because maybe the, you know, prospect of being able to save her grandchild's life is going to motivate her to stay sober.
Edmund: You really believe that?
Brooke: Well, I'd like to believe that for Enzo's sake. I mean, hey, you know, that's -- what's the matter with holding a positive thought?
Edmund: Can't hurt.
Brooke: Look at Laura’s situation, you know? I mean, everything looked hopeless, time was running out, there was no donor.
Edmund: And let me guess -- you never gave up hope?
Brooke: I had my moments.
Edmund: I know. Who would have thought that Gillian’s death would have saved Laura’s life, huh?
Brooke: I think it's possible that a miracle will happen. I can feel it.
Hayley: You know, Mateo, when we found out that Enzo needed a liver transplant, I -- I went into the chapel and I prayed to and I -- I told him that if he sent somebody to save our baby, I would never ask him for another thing as long as I lived.
Mateo: That's called bargaining with God. It doesn't work that way.
Hayley: Yeah, well, I had to put it out there anyway.
Mateo: Every parent of a sick child prays the same thing, makes the same promise.
Hayley: God listened to us. God answered our prayers. He sent Arlene. And I can't help but thinking that maybe her being here is a sign, you know, that it's a chance for all of us to heal, not just Enzo, you know?
Mateo: Okay, let's say Arlene is the miracle that you prayed for, that she is a match for Enzo. I mean --
Hayley: What's wrong with that?
Mateo: Nothing. But it still doesn't change the fact that your mom's an alcoholic. And she's tried to quit how many times? I mean, you -- you heard her. She said that the pressure was going to push her back to the bottle.
Hayley: No, Mateo. No. She knows what's at stake here. She knows that this is her last -- her last chance with Enzo. It's her last chance to be a part of our family. She would not do anything to ruin that.
Mateo: Stuart, where's Arlene?
Hayley: Where is she?
Mateo: I thought you were going to keep an eye on her.
Stuart: Arlene said she was going to meet me in the cafeteria for some ice cream, and I waited, and she didn't. And I thought maybe she came back here.
Brooke: More battery acid?
Edmund: Sure. Finish off what's left of my stomach lining.
Mateo: Hey, you seen Arlene?
Edmund: Yeah, just with Stuart.
Brooke: Are the test results back?
Mateo: No. And if she's where I think she is, it's not going to matter.
Ryan: "Chris, I can't tell you how often I've relived that day -- Patrick dragging me off, knowing I would never see you again. My life became a prison with no hope of escape."
Chris: Ryan, if you skip down a little, there's a part where your mom talks about when you were born. You got to read that part.
Ryan: "Years too late, you're finding out we had a son. I imagined you with me the morning Ryan was born, holding your boy in arms that never struck out in anger. Love at first sight -- the way it was with us. Chris, he looked so much like you, so much it hurt to look at him sometimes. It hurt just to be near him because he reminded me that I was a cheat and I was a coward and I robbed him of a life with the father who would have loved him to the skies and gave him to the man who wished he'd never been born."
Chris: "As much as I know that you'll hate me for hurting your son, know that I hated myself more. Every blow I struck against Ryan was me hitting back at the world without you. Every drink I took was to wash away your memory, meant another beating, another bruise, another black eye for Ryan. I don't have the nerve to ask you or your son to forgive the unforgivable, so I'm writing this letter too many years too late to try to make up in some small way for the damage I've done by giving a father back to his son. I wish I could be there when Ryan meets you for the first time. I wish I could see his face not filled with fear but with wonder, knowing finally that he wasn't a mistake, that our son was part of something wonderful, born of love. The hell of it is despite the abuse, Ryan grew into a kind and caring man. He took care of me when by rights he should have spit on me and walked away. God knows he did nothing in his lifetime to make a poor excuse for a mother like me, even though I did love him in my stupid, stumbling, sorry way. I loved him with all my heart."
Kendall: Here we go again, your tour de force, how the epic act of giving birth to me makes up for all the damage, all the neglect.
Erica: No one neglected you, Kendall. You were raised by people who doted on you, who truly wanted you, who supported you, who spoiled you, who loved you.
Kendall: The way that you never could?
Erica: My mother, Mona, and I gave you a wonderful life.
Kendall: But not the one I wanted.
Erica: No, because you always felt that the harts were not good enough for you. That's why you came back to Pine Valley -- to get what you thought you had coming to you.
Kendall: And you were just so happy to see me, your long-lost daughter.
Erica: Did I turn my back on you? Did I slam the door in your face? Did I turn you out in the streets? No. When I learned who you were, I took you in, I gave you a job. And your response was to stab me in the back again and again.
Kendall: That's because you thought I wasn't worthy. I didn't deserve the love that little baby Bianca got without asking. You know, the funny thing is I would have crawled over broken glass if just once you looked at me and told me --
Erica: I'm sorry, I -- I can’t.
Kendall: Can't or won't? Have you ever -- have you ever really looked at me, Erica? Really looked at me? Not the mistake, not the disappointment, but me?
Erica: Oh, God knows I've tried.
Kendall: I'm your daughter. I am your daughter --
Kendall: Your flesh and blood.
Erica: No, you're not. You're him. And every time I look into your eyes, I see him looking back at me.
Erica: The man who raped me. Merry Christmas.
Ryan: I don't get it. Why did she never tell me? Why did she let me believe that I was never loved?
Chris: I take a cut of the blame for that.
Ryan: You? Why? What did you do?
Chris: Nothing. Absolutely nothing. When your mom left, I just shut down. I should have had a little bit more faith in what we had going on, and I should have gone after her, Ryan.
Ryan: Well, you know, it's easy to look back and --
Chris: No. I tell you, it hurts like hell. If I had -- if -- if I had gone after her and found out what was really going down, then we could have -- we could have put things back together, we could have been a family. And you would have had that childhood that you so rightly deserved. But I froze. I froze because of my pride, that same false pride that has kept me hungry most of my life, kept me living life on the outside.
Ryan: Well, at least we know the truth. I mean, it's not pretty, but it's a lot better we thought it was.
Chris: You hate me?
Ryan: How could I hate someone that loved my mother so much?
Chris: There's something else I want you to see.
Ryan: What? What is it?
Chris: Do you -- remember that day I told you about when we all went down to the shore and had a really good time? I -- I gave this to your mom under the boardwalk, and she asked me if we were -- "Are we going steady?" Yeah, we were -- we were going strong and steady for a while.
Ryan: I don't remember ever seeing that.
Chris: Yeah, well, she probably hid it, like she did everything else. I want you to have it.
Ryan: Me? Why?
Chris: Because right now, that ring is all about what could have been. You find your love, you grab it and you hold on to it, and you don't ever let it go, no matter what. Your mom -- she -- she gave us one last hell of a blue sky there, didn't she?
Ryan: I got some things I got to think about.
Chris: And I got some things I got to do. I'll see you, son.
Kendall: So that's all you see when you look at me? The guy who raped you?
Erica: I -- I didn't want you to know.
Kendall: Oh, yeah, I could just see you were trying to hold back. You know, I think that's the first time you've ever looked me in the eyes. Why is that, Mother?
Erica: Because when I look at you, I see him. I see his eyes. Everything about you reminds me.
Kendall: So, I look like my father. Big deal. When are you going to stop using that rape as an excuse to hate me?
Erica: "That rape"? Is that how you really see it? Like that broken fingernail or that skinned knee? That rape has haunted me my whole life.
Kendall: Yeah, like you've tried to get over it.
Erica: Do you think that I like walking around with these memories, Kendall? Yes, I have tried to get over it. Yes, I have tried to put it behind me. I pretended that it never happened. I tried so hard to block it out that for months I didn't even tell my mother what happened. I hid it from her. I kept it inside. It was a private nightmare. Until I realized that it did not end that night, that there was something growing inside me. I was 14 years old. I had been raped by a man who then turned around and walked away as if nothing had happened.
Kendall: Thanks for the bedtime story.
Erica: How can you be like this? How can you be so dismissive? I'm not finished. You need to stay here. You need to hear this until you really hear it, until you get it, why I look at you, Kendall, and I remember everything that man took from me and how close he came to taking it from Bianca the night you left her alone in your motel room with him.
Kendall: You make it sound like I did it on purpose. I never wanted Bianca to get hurt.
Erica: You left Bianca alone in your room with a rapist, and you knew it and you did it deliberately, Kendall.
Kendall: Nothing happened to Bianca.
Erica: That is a different issue. And thank God nothing happened to her. But you left her alone with that animal! And knowing that she was there -- knowing that -- that sent me crashing back to a time that I hoped to God that I had put behind me.
Kendall: Well, here I am, the gift that keeps on giving.
Erica: Who are you with this mean mouth at all times? And why do you keep on coming back, Kendall? Why? You know I have nothing to give. I have nothing more to give. It's because you're like your father, and it's not just your eyes. It's not just because the color of your eyes are like his. It's because I see through those eyes to his soul. You are someone who tries to find out another person's weakness and then you move in for the kill. Now, I was unable to defend myself against your father. But you will never get the best of me.
Chris: Just heard you moved your things to another room. Care to tell me why?
Kendall: She's freezing you out. Who knows what big, bad bogeyman you remind her of.
Chris: Why don't we go somewhere else and clear the air, have a little talk.
Mateo: Same old Arlene, huh?
Arlene: Yeah. Yeah, same old, same old. That's right, Mateo. You were right all along.
Mateo: You know what? If it were up to me, I'd let you drown in this dump. But my son needs your help if he's going to see his first birthday, and I'll be damned if I let you soak your liver in booze just because you can't take the heat! You know, you can't even wait for the test result?
Arlene: I can wait. I already know.
Mateo: What do you mean you know? What -- I --
Arlene: I couldn't wait for the doctor to take her own sweet time, so I got the results on my own.
Arlene: The liver's a bust. What a surprise, huh?
Mateo: I was so sure. We were so sure.
Arlene: Yeah. Well, there's no such thing in this life as a sure thing except for me blowing it.
Mateo: Well, we got to tell Hayley.
Arlene: I'm not going to do it. No, please, don't make me be the one. Don't make me be the one to take her hope away.
Mateo: She's got to know.
Arlene: Not from me. Mateo, since I've been here, I -- there's been this light in Hayley's eyes. And I -- I'd like to think that I put it there. She let me be a mother to her. She needed me.
Mateo: Yeah, and she still needs you.
Arlene: Not to dash her hopes about that little boy. Look, you know more than anyone that I'm no saint. And I admit it -- when I first got here, I did see Enzo as a way of getting in good with Hayley. But then the strangest thing. I was holding him in my arms and he was looking up at me, and I forgot about me. And I started to believe that I really could do this mom/grandma thing and mean it. Then I got the test results back, and that just killed it. All I want is something smooth and on a running tab.
Mateo: You know, even though you can't be the donor, there's a good chance that Hayley's going to want you to, you know, stick around, be the mom that you promised.
Arlene: Mateo, I am this close to my next drink. I couldn't stand to see the disappointment in her face without one. I'm all played out, and I know it. And if I can't do anything else for my daughter, I can leave her in peace.
Mateo: So you're not going to say good-bye?
Arlene: Tell her I'm sorry. I'm sorrier than I've ever been. And that I love her. I don't think I ever knew how much I loved her until today.
Mateo: You know what? I believe you.
Ryan: Kendall, you're not going to believe this. My mom sent Chris a letter -- I mean, she had a letter sent to him after she died. Turns out that she actually loved the guy, that she didn't want to leave him, especially after she found out that she was pregnant with his kid. I didn't think it mattered what my parents felt about each other, but now that I know that -- that they loved each other when they were together, when they had me, I mean, I just feel better about myself.
Kendall: That's -- that's really good, Ryan. But it's really no surprise that someone as decent as you are came from two people who loved each other -- unlike me. God knows love was the last thing on the minds of the people who conceived me.
Ryan: Hey, wait, wait, wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's going on?
Kendall: Look, Ryan, you are a great guy, but let's face it, this relationship -- or whatever the hell you want to call it -- it's really headed nowhere.
Ryan: Oh, I see. And when did we come to this conclusion?
Kendall: Look, I'm not good, not for you, not for anyone.
Ryan: You did it again. You went to see Erica again.
Chris: Erica, open up. Erica, you moved out. You could at least tell me why. Sweetheart, you're blowing this letter thing way out of proportion. If you just open up, give me the opportunity to explain -- fine, have it your way. I'm out of here.
Hayley: Well, did you find her?
Hayley: Well, where is she? They're going to have the test results back soon, and she needs to be here just in case we're going to do the procedure right away.
Mateo: Listen, I -- I confirmed something with Dr. Conway that -- that Arlene found out earlier. She's not a match.
Hayley: What? Are they sure? Did they double-check?
Mateo: Yeah, they did. Edmund and Brooke -- they're checking the database for another donor right now.
Hayley: Oh. What happened to my prayers? My prayers?
Mateo: They're going to be answered. I know they will, okay?
Hayley: I don't understand this. Why didn't -- why didn't she just tell us herself if she's not a match?
Mateo: I don't think she wanted to be the one to let you down. She told me to tell you good-bye.
Mateo: She --
Hayley: What? Good-bye? What does that mean? Oh, this is just great. What happened? What happened to her being here to help us out, you know, give us a hand, to help us -- help us take care of Enzo? Oh, Enzo. I get it. Of course I do. Because Arlene is not the star of the show, so therefore she's not going to stick around anymore because if it's not about her needs and her problems, she just doesn't care about us. I thought for once in her lousy life she would actually be a real mother to me, a real grandmother to Enzo. It's not about her, so --
Mateo: Maybe you're wrong this time. Maybe your mom for the first time put you first. You know? Maybe she showed you how much she loved you by doing the right thing and leaving you alone.
Bartender: Hey, that booze won't get any stronger just sitting there.
Arlene: You know what? I'm not thirsty. Hand me my bag. Have one on me. And one for the road.
Chris: You going to let me in? Or are we going to treat the rest of the guests to our personal business?
Erica: You walked out on me.
Chris: No, darling, I didn't walk out on you. Seeing that handwriting, you -- you have no idea how it affected me or why.
Erica: You can only do that once to me! You don't get a second chance!
Chris: You know, closing a door on me means nothing compared to the doors you close on me inside yourself.
Erica: Get out!
Ryan: Kendall, what the hell is wrong with you? Just look at me. Just --
Kendall: No, please, please, please, Ryan, don't touch me! Don't touch me. Listen, Erica is right. Everything about me is bad. I'm not good for you. I'm not good for anyone. I was born bad.
Ryan: Tell me something, Kendall. If you are so bad, then why do I love you so much?
Ryan: Kendall. Kendall!
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Brooke: Now you want to come first again? No way. I am not making the same mistake twice.
Mia: Oh, Jake, we need to cool it.
Man: Mr. du Pres, I understand you have something you wish to ask me.