[ Telephone Ringing] Chloe: Daily Planet Info Line. Obituaries?
Yeah, sure, let me transfer -- Oh, dog obituaries. Oh, I'm sorry. We
don't actually run those. Yeah, okay. You're welcome.
Lois: Die! Die
Chloe: Lois, I'm sorry you were in for a girls' night out, and
I got called in to screen news that's not fit to print.
Lois: Compared to the Kent farm, this is a rager.
[ Both laugh ]
Lois: Besides, I
wouldn't pass up an opportunity to watch a big-shot reporter in action.
Chloe: All right, now that I'm swimming in butter, why are you
really here obliterating aliens with me at 1:00 a.m.?
Lois: I'm racking up brownie points.
Lois: I need you to help me move
out of the Kents' next weekend.
Chloe: Oh, you took the apartment at the Talon? How are you
ever gonna live without Clark?
Lois: One word -- blissfully. How you ever had a crush on
Richie Cunningham, I will never understand. Come on, you-- you got to come
back to Smallville. It'll be fun. I'll buy pizza.
Chloe: Lois, you don't need to Tom Sawyer me. We're
family. Just tell me when to be there.
[ Telephone ringing ] uhh. [ sighs ] Daily Planet info line.
Melissa: I need a reporter to meet me.
Chloe: Who is this?
I want to talk to a reporter. You have to send someone fast before he
finds me -- 7th and Edgemont. Please, you've got to hurry.
[ Dial Tone ]
Lois: We couldn't have met her at a coffee shop?
Chloe: I don't think she was looking for a brunch date, Lois.
It sounds like she had a story someone didn't want her to tell.
Lois: I thought you were supposed to pass on any real leads to
someone whose cubicle was actually above ground.
Chloe: Well, unless I want to stay subterranean my whole
career, I've got to take a chance.
Melissa: Please, help me!
Chloe: There she is.
Chloe: Over here! [ Gasps ] She's dead.
Somebody save me
Let your warm hands break right through
Somebody save me
I don't care how you do it
Stay with me
I've been waiting for you
Just stay with me
I've made this whole world shine for you
Jonathan: How much longer do I have you before you [ Grunts ]
hightail it back to Metropolis?
Clark: Well, Lana's gone for the weekend. I lost out to a
comet her class is tracking at the Lincoln Observatory.
Jonathan: What about Chloe or Lois?
Clark: Well, Chloe's juggling classes and the Daily Planet.
And Lois -- I'd do anything to get rid of Lois.
[ Jonathan laughs]
Clark: I don't think that's exactly prereq for best-friend
Jonathan: Well --
[ engine revving ]
Jonathan: Hold this.
Jonathan: That the best you got? Got another 6 inches out
Jack: I wasn't sure how rusty your reflexes had gotten.
Jack: I know it's been a long time, but what happened to "Uncle
Clark: Doesn't seem fit for someone who's on a first-name basis
with the governor.
[ laughs ]
Jack: I don't seem to remember the governor winning
a state football championship. Congratulations.
Jack: I don't suppose anybody pushed you to follow in
Jonathan: Hey, now. That's a lot better than spending the football games
underneath the bleachers with the sheriff's daughters.
Jack: Not both of them at once.
Jonathan: Since when do you make the trek all the way out here
in the middle of a campaign?
Jack: Exactly why I came. I needed a breather from the rat
race. Besides, I can use your help rallying the farmers. You got a lot
of pull with that union.
Jonathan: Why? You always win this county by a landslide.
Jack: Well, the race is about to get a lot tougher. Rumor has it I'm
running against Lex Luthor.
Maggie: Let me get this straight --no I.D. or make on the
vehicle, no I.D. on the driver, and no clue why this girl called. Well,
I'd say you're off to a great start as an investigative reporter, Miss
Sullivan. If you remember anything else, let me know.
Lois: I think that's code for "we're gonna file this under the rug."
Maggie: This is a big city, and bad things happen. A pretty,
young girl not in college with no traceable job...in that part of town?
It's not a mystery what happened down there.
Lois: You don't think it's strange that an alleged streetwalker
was wearing $500 Jimmy Choo shoes?
Look, Detective Sawyer, this girl died trying to tell me her story. Now,
I'm sorry I'm not street-hardened, but she's way more than a statistic
to me. We have to find out who did this.
Maggie: I applaud your spirit, girls, but you should know
that most of those streets turn out to be dead ends. Now, I will do my
job. You do yours.
[ Chloe sighs ]
Lois: Hopefully you'll have more luck than Officer Stalin.
Chloe: Yeah, I ran the number that Melissa girl called from. It
was from a pay phone right near where we saw her. But the only addresses
within 10 blocks of the place was a bunch of warehouses...and a club called the Windgate.
Lois: I'm guessing she
didn't get all glammed up to count inventory.
Jack: So your dad outran four cop cars and pissed off half the
chicken farmers in Chickasaw County.
Jonathan: It's only because you said that you knew a shortcut.
Clark: See, these aren't the sides of the story that I hear.
You got any more of these? They'll come in very useful next time I'm in
for a lecture.
Jonathan: No, I don't think -- [ knocking on door ] Hang on.
say anything else. Just a second!
Maggie: Maggie Sawyer --Metropolis P.D.
Maggie: May I
Jonathan: Uh, yeah, sure. Come on in.
Maggie: Thank you. Senator. Campaign headquarters said I could
find you here.
Jack: What can I do for ya?
Maggie: A young woman was killed in the warehouse district last night -- hit-and-run. We
went through her apartment, and we found this. Now, I don't have enough
evidence to bring you in for questioning, but I would certainly
appreciate an explanation.
Jack: So would I. I've never seen her before.
Maggie: Well, that must have been tricky while she was cuddled
up on your lap. With all due respect, Senator, pictures don't lie.
Jonathan: Hang on just a minute. This day and age,
they most certainly do. Uh... This picture's a fake.
It doesn't matter. The minute it hits the press, the damage is done.
This could ruin me.
Jonathan: So it looks like the mudslinging's already started.
[ chuckles] Dad, do you really think Lex would go this far?
Jonathan: Come on, Clark. You know Lex Luthor better than anybody. He's not
gonna enter a race unless he's sure he's gonna win it.
Clark: Is it true, Lex?
Lex: You know, after you've been M.I.A. for weeks, I don't
think a hello is too much to ask for.
Clark: How long you been planning to run for state senate?
Lex: Several months now, and, uh, if you're implying I should have
told you, you, uh, might want to rethink the barrier you've drawn on this
Clark: I can't believe you'd destroy someone just to win a
Lex: There's a reason they call it race, not a political potluck.
But if you think I had something do with this...
Clark: Lex, your competition was linked to the murder of a
young girl just before you announced your candidacy. That's a bit of a
coincidence, isn't it? You honestly don't recognize that picture?
Lex: The only thing I recognize is the booth. It's the Windgate
Gentlemen's Club in Metropolis -- not a smart stop-off for an incumbent
on the campaign trail.
Clark: Look, I know this guy, and if you're not trying to set
him up, somebody is. Maybe it's somebody at this club.
Lex: Clark, there's a reason that club's so underground. All
right, the city doesn't exactly give licenses for some of the things
that go on there. Are you sure you want to get involved in this?
Clark: Jack's like an uncle to me. And in case you've
forgotten, that's what friends do for each other.
Lex: Look, if you're serious about getting through that front
door... You're gonna need a little more than your driver's license. Do
me a favor. Stay out of trouble.
Chloe: I guess even MapQuest has its limitations. How do you
get in this place, through a manhole cover?
Lois: Or a big neon door. I'd say the Armani suit's a dead
Bouncer: Sorry, girls.
Lois: Oh, come on, our friend's already in there.
Chloe: Yeah, it's
her only night in town, and I'd promised I'd take her to the hottest
Bouncer It's a private club, so I'm afraid this is as much of
the place as you're going to see.
[ Chloe sighs ]
Girl: You have a run.
Other girl: I know.
[ cheers and applause and whistling in distance ]
Chloe: this makes my Halloween Heidi Dirndl costume look tame.
Lois: So, you think that Melissa girl was a dancer here?
Chloe: I don't know. Jimmy Choos are a long way from angel
wings and fishnets. Excuse me. Hi. Uh, do you guys know anything
about a woman named Melissa Page?
[ cheers and applause in background]
Chloe: People won't talk, but records definitely will. If she worked here,
she'll be on file.
Owner: Joe, David! In my office. Are you ladies lost?
Lois: Um, we were just looking for, uh...
Chloe: Don't be shy. She's here to dance.
Owner: Are you the replacement Rocco sent over?
Chloe: Yeah, uh, he really hated to see her go.
Owner: Take your clothes off. Let's see what you got.
[ Knock on door ]
Lex: I knocked. I guess you didn't hear.
Jonathan: No, I heard you.
Lex: I'm here to see Senator Jennings.
Jonathan: Lex, if you want to sling some mud, I'd
strongly recommend you do at in somebody else's house.
Lex: Don't worry, I'm not holding my breath for your vote.
Jonathan: [ Sighs ] You know, I've never liked you
all that much, Lex, but even I'm surprised by the depths you're willing
to sink to.
Lex: And I'm sure you have such a good view of it all from your
pulpit. Holier-than-thou is an easy fallback, Mr. Kent. It
keeps you from really looking at the people around you.
Jonathan: I've known Jack for over twenty five years.
I've never had a more trustworthy or loyal friend. This state needs somebody like him, somebody
who's willing to stand by their word, somebody who's willing to do
what's right for everybody, not just for himself... Somebody whose
willing to go up against people like you.
Lex: Well, if you know him so well, maybe you should ask your
good ol' boy to explain this to you. After Clark's visit, I decided to
look into the senator's unfortunate snapshot myself. It's his cellphone
record. Seems he's been calling his dead stripper friend a little more
Jonathan: When are you releasing this?
Lex: I'm not. But if I found it, you know the press won't be
far behind. I thought he'd like a heads up.
[ door closes ]
Chloe: Lois, are you almost done? You didn't have that much to put
Lois: You know, remind me when all this is over to never ever
ask a favor of you again.
Chloe: This isn't about me. This about getting to the truth.
Lois: Yeah, well, the last girl that knew the truth ended up as
a hood ornament on someone's car.
Howdy. You know, my friend's really excited about working here, but I
think it's kind of dangerous, especially after that girl was killed and
Stripper: How can I explain this to you? Don't talk to me.
Don't talk to any of us.
Lois: Well? [ chuckles ] What do you think?
Chloe: All I can say is... God bless America.
Owner: Good evening. First time at the Windgate?
Clark: Yeah, uh, Lex Luthor referred me.
Owner: Will Mr. Luthor be joining you this evening?
Clark: No, I'll, uh... I'm meeting Jack Jennings.
Owner: The senator? Let me show you his usual table.
Lois: Uh, on second thought --no, no, no, no, no.
Chloe: Thinking -- bad. dancing -- good. Just ask Mr.
Shoot-first, think-later over there. Now, I need you to dig deep down
and find your inner Demi Moore.
Lois: [ sighs ] Okay? Yeah. You better at least use this
distraction to find something about Melissa.
Owner: Here you go.
Clark: Thank you.
Man: You're welcome. Have a good evening.
Waitress: Hey, handsome. What can I get for you?
Clark: I'll have a coke... ...s-straight up on the rocks.
[ Sighs ]
Announcer: Gentlemen, let's give Carolyn a nice au revoir. And
now making her
first Windgate appearance, welcome to the stage, all-American girl Amber
Lyon: [ foreign accent ] Bravo! Bravo!
Announcer: I'd salute to that any time. Let's give it up for our red-blooded recruit.
And now let's
give a good homegrown welcome -- to Dixie!
[ cheers and applause ]
Lois: What are you doing here?
Clark: What are you doing here?
Lois: It's Chloe's fault. We're following a murder story.
Clark: Yeah, well, that makes two of us, but I think I'll stick
to my method.
Lois: Hey, you're gonna get me fired if you keep looking at me
like I'm Jabba the Hut.
Clark: What do you want me to do?
Oh, uh...I don't know. Give me a 20 and meet me out back.
Clark [ sighs ] Uh...
[ Lois groans ]
Lyon: Bravo! That new girl -- who is she? I want her.
Owner: I don't know. She's new. For 500k, you know I don't
ask any questions of my girls.
Lyon: And for that much, you better not answer any, either.
Police: Everybody freeze!
Maggie: Metropolis P.D.! Everybody take it
easy! We have a report of minors working and being served in this
establishment. We will be interviewing you individually. Please have
your I.D.'s ready.
Lyon: Come on.
Lyon: You want to stick around and get arrested? Come.
Maggie: The really wrong time and the really wrong place, kid.
You're under arrest.
Owner: What is this about?
Maggie: Well, we have an anonymous tip that a car involved in a
hit-and-run last night was seen leaving your establishment.
Owner: You can't just arrest everybody.
Maggie: The city's looked the other way because your clientele
can pull a lot of strings. Now I've got a dead 19-year-old on my
hands. I got to go by the book. Okay, people, listen up.
I know that it's 5:00 in the morning. Your cooperation would be
greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Clark: Chloe. Where's Lois?
Chloe: I don't know. What are - Clark, what are you doing
Bouncer: What do you want to know? Maybe I can help you.
Maggie: You're the bouncer. You know everything that goes on in this place.
Bouncer: Cut me a deal.
Maggie: Tell me about Jennings.
Bouncer: He was drunk. I took him home. He had nothing to
do with the girl. He's innocent.
Chloe: Wow, these are, um -- they're heavier than they look.
Stripper: [ Laughs ] they're way better than the heels. Trust me.
Chloe: So, you guys must have been pretty close with Melissa,
Uh, sorry. Okay. Premature segue. But, come on. We're obviously on
the same side here. I just want to know what happened to her.
Stripper #1: It's a tragedy is what it is. She finally gets her
shot at Prince Charming, and wham --bye-bye, ivory tower.
Chloe: Are you talking about the senator?
Stripper #2: No way. The only thing he did wrong was fall for her.
Stripper #1: There's this suave guy, kind of Euro-looking.
Chloe: Now, what did he want with Melissa?
Stripper #2: Every few months he picks some lucky girl and takes
her out of this dump.
Stripper #1: Probably to some tropical island somewhere.
Stripper #3: [ Whip snaps ] You know why they invented fairy tales?
Because no one wants to face reality. All we know is that the girls
disappear, and then no one ever sees them again. Somebody should have
warned your friend about that.
Stripper #3: Yeah, I saw her leave with him during the raid.
Maggie: Sullivan... Let's go.
Maggie: You can thank Lex Luthor for some
very generous phone calls.
Chloe: Detective Sawyer, I think the guy that killed Melissa
Page has my cousin.
Clark: It's the same guy that made some deal with the club owner
just before she
Maggie: You know this guy's name? Okay, so let me see if I'm
understanding you. Your cousin, who I'm assuming is underage, was
stripping and making deals with wealthy patrons, managed to escape a
police raid --
Clark: It's not like that.
Chloe: Yeah, she was just helping me to
Maggie: Investigate? Okay...Luthor may have pulled
a get-out-of-jail-free card for you this time, but it will not happen
again. If you want to play Nancy Drew and Hardy Boy, do it in someone
Jack: Look, if I don't change my stance just because some poll
tells me to, I am certainly not going to because some journalist hears a
rumor, okay, Jordan? Goodbye.
You just could not resist, could you?
Jonathan: You still have a nasty habit of leaving your keys in
the ignition. Get in.
Jack: With you at the wheel? I guess it wouldn't be the first
time I put my life in your hands. What? Damn thing's been stuck ever
since I bought it.
[ Engine turns over ] [ Engine roaring ] [ Tires screeching ]
Jack: Try that with a 4-cylinder. So what's the real reason for
Jonathan: When were you gonna tell me about the girl, Jack?
Jack: What, you think I had something to do with what happened?
Jonathan: I have no idea, but I do think it's time you gave me
some straight answers, don't you?
Jack: Look, I didn't want you to be involved. There's only so
much you should ask of a friend.
Jonathan: Oh, so, instead, you lie to my face --
Jack: Well, what do you want me to say? That my marriage is
more of a business arrangement, and the only person who makes me happy
is some dancer half my age? How much of that would you have really understood?
Jonathan: I might not understand any of it, Jack. But, come on,
all of our lives have taken turns that we didn't expect.
Jack: You've never had a lie get out of hand... Or you've never
been caught at it.
[ Tires screeching ]
Jonathan: I've never been in a position where people look up to
me. You are Clark's hero.
Jack: So I'm not supposed to have any faults, huh? Who can live
up to that? You know why there's no heroes today... It's because at the
end of the day, people don't respect them -- they envy them. And they're
just waiting for them to screw up.
Jonathan: What are you gonna do, Jack?
Jack: [ Sighs ] What do you want me to do? I'm a good senator. You
want to give that kind of power to somebody like Lex Luthor?
Jonathan: I might not agree with Lex Luthor's politics, Jack,
but at least I know who he is.
Lois: Nice place you got.
Lyon: Thank you.
Lois: Well, thanks for helping me out back there.
Lyon: My pleasure. [ Clears throat ] I think I have something a
little more your size. I won't peek...I promise.
Lois: [ exhales sharply ] Melissa.
Lyon: You want me to help you tie it?
Lois: Oh, oh, no. That's fine, um... Almost got it.
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Lois: Wow.[ chuckles ] Whatcha doing there?
Lyon: It looks so much better on you than any of the others. [
Chuckles ] You are going to make them very jealous.
Lois: You know, I think I'm just gonna call a cab.
Lyon: Think of your taxi days as a thing of the past. You have
a whole new life ahead of you now.
Lois: I don't know what kind of kink you're into, but.. ...you
are seriously behind on your Gloria Steinem!
[ Electrical buzzing ]
Chloe: So the owner of the Windgate is selling his strippers to
the highest bidder?
Clark: It's Kansas. It's definitely not Smallville.
Chloe: 500 grand for a massage with benefits seems like a lot.
Do you know anything else?
Clark: Just the bouncer told Detective Sawyer that the guy was
the son of some foreign diplomat.
Chloe: Then he'd have diplomatic plates. See, while you
were inside checking out the entertainment, I was out in the parking lot
taking shots of the license plates on all the cars. Here we go.
Clark: Okay, check that one.
Chloe: That's the U.N. Tower.
[ helicopter blade whirring]
[ Ringing ]
Chloe: Chloe Sullivan.
Clark: He's got Lois. Any psychic guesses on this guy's
Chloe: God, don't even try --he's probably got like a zillion
layers of security on it.
Clark: Yeah, but it's still warm. They must've just left.
The printer's still on.
Chloe: Try pressing "print" again.
Clark: Chloe, it's a fake passport for Lois. You think
they're gonna try to smuggle her out of the country?
Chloe: Even if he does, I doubt he'll take her through an
airport. Clark, there's a helipad on the roof.
[ Helicopter blades whirring]
Pilot: we're stuck on something!
Lois: Hey, 007...Nice of you to show up.
Clark: I'll start assuming that means thank you? Looks like it
got caught on the cable.
Lois: This scumbag was about to air-cargo me to the honeymoon
suite at the "Gropacabana."
Maggie: I'm glad you're all right. Now, if you will release
him, I'm afraid Mr. Lyon is free to go.
Clark: What? You can't just let him walk away.
Lyon: Diplomatic immunity.
Maggie: As a consulate guest in our
country, Mr. Lyon can't be arrested or tried for any crime he commits on
our soil... even murder. I'm sorry. I can't touch him.
Lois: Well, I can.
Maggie: Some people live above the rules. Guess what?
That's life in Metropolis. You want justice, I suggest you stay a little
closer to home.
[ Door opens ]
Lex: We'll finish this later.
Clark: I just want to say thank you.
Lex: You know, when I asked you to stay out of trouble, I kind
of thought that might include, uh, being caught underage at a strip club
using my membership while I'm gearing up for a political campaign.
Clark: I didn't mean to drag you into this.
Lex: Come on, Clark. Who are you kidding? You had me
masterminding this whole Jennings plot before you walked through those
Clark: I didn't think he was lying to me.
Lex: But you assumed I would.
Clark: I can't believe that I looked up to Jack.
Lex: Tell me what you remember about King David. Humor me.
Clark: King David... Slew Goliath, saved his people.
Lex: And afterward, he saw a beautiful woman bathing and fell madly
in love. The problem was, she turned out to be his best friend's wife.
So you know what our great hero did? He sent his best friend off to die
in battle so he could have her to himself.
Clark: Kind of leave that part out,
Lex: We all need to believe in heroes, Clark, and even the best
ones are far from perfect.
Clark: Surprised to see your car out front. I thought
you'd be gone now that you're clear of murder.
Jack: I've been mulling over some pretty tough decisions.
This seemed like a good place to get my bearings again.
Clark: Have you talked to my dad yet?
Jack: I'd say he did most of the talking. After 20 years,
the man's still got a Hell of a knack for the guilt trip, doesn't he?
Clark: Usually works 'cause he's right.
Jack: Your father's always had some pretty high expectations of
the people around him. He's the one man I never wanted to
Clark: You should try being his son. The thing I always try to
remember is, no matter how much he lays on... He never expects more than
he expects of himself.
Jack: You think your dad will ever forgive me?
Clark: Yeah. I've given him a lot of trial runs in the
[Jack chuckles ]
Clark: Look, I know my dad's friendship means a lot to you. But there's
a lot of other people out there who look up to you.
Jack: I guess you can only pull off the disguise of being
superhuman for so long, huh?
Clark: What are you gonna do?
Jack: I've called a press conference. I'm pulling out of the
Jonathan: Going back to the city, facing all these reporters takes a lot of guts.
Jack: After facing you, live feeds and blood-thirsty journalists are
a walk in the park!
Jonathan: Look, if we let a couple of rough days destroy over 25
years of friendship, then I guess we weren't as good of friends as I
thought we were. [ sighs ] Jack, if you're pulling out of this race
because your old buddy can't seem to climb off of his pulpit, that's
not what I want. All I really ask is that you be honest.
Jack: I'm pulling out of the race because I'm no longer the
best man for the job.
Jonathan: Are you sure? If you want to hang in there and fight,
I'll be right behind you 100%.
Jack: I know. But all those things you said about being
loyal and trustworthy and willing to take on the Luthors of the world -- I
might have been that man once, but I have to step aside when I see
somebody who still embodies all those qualities.
Jonathan: Jack, you can't seriously be talking about Lex Luthor.
Jack: I'm talking about you, Jon. Kansas could use a senator
like you. You should think about it.
Hey, Smallville. Your personal space is about to be reinstated.
Clark: What are you doing? You just moved back in.
Lois: Well, now that Lana's living with Chloe, I'm taking the
place. You don't have a key to the apartment, do you? You know, now that
you two have been doing it? [ Clicks her teeth ]
Clark: No, we, uh...
Lois: Good, because I wouldn't want any surprise midnight
Clark: Is there anything I can do to make this move go faster --
maybe pack your three closets of clothing, burn your Luffa sponge, take
your Whitesnake collection to Goodwill?
Lois: You can take this. Come on, Smallville, move it.
Clark: You know, this is weird. I spent so much time up here
Lois: Clark, it's not like I'm taking her place, just her
Chloe: Okay, before I start any of the real heavy lifting, you
have to indulge me for just a moment in my first Daily Planet by-line.
It's not exactly The Torch, Clark -- page 73. At the bottom.
Chloe: Thanks. Well, you deserve half the credit. I' mean, Id still be
playing point guard at the pet-obituary hotline if it weren't for you
Clark: Oh, it says here Interpol was able to arrest him due to an anonymous
Chloe: About that heavy lifting...
Lois: Clark? Look, I'm not great at this, so just keep
your mouth shut and listen up. Even though I was kicking butt on the
helicopter, it was really nice to have backup. And you didn't have to
come after me, but you always do. So I wanted to say thank you.
You're a really good friend. Oh, and, uh, about the lap dance... If you
decide to tell anybody about it, your Elmer Fudd night-light will make a
very public appearance.
Clark: Aye-aye... Sailor.
[ Lois chuckles ]
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