Piper: Yeah, no, I-I realize we haven't had a band in a couple of months,
but, you, haven't you read the papers? I've been helping
Homeland...
[ dial tone ]
Piper:
Security. It even sounds ridiculous to me. I don't get it.
It's, you know, 2 lousy months,
and suddenly
I'm ice cold.
Leo: Hey, bands will be back.
P-3's still the hottest
club in town.
Piper: Oh, yeah? When?
Hey. Watch it.
Leo: Sorry. Listen, do you want me
to talk to Smitty?
I'm playing golf
with him this afternoon.
Piper: No. I don't like that guy.
He's slimy.
Leo: Yeah, but
he's got connections.
He got you The Donnas.
Piper: Fine. Let him win.
Leo: [ Chuckles ] Morning.
Paige: Hi. I didn't
know Leo golfed.
Piper: Yeah, he does,
but not very well.
Don't tell him. Why are you so dressed up?
Paige: Uh, well, the elders
have assigned me a charge,
a future whitelighter.
Piper: So, is that a good thing?
Paige: Yeah. It is if he's cute.
Phoebe: Don't you ever
answer call waiting?
Piper: Why?
Phoebe: Well, Agent Murphy's
been trying to get through.
He's got a case for us.
Paige: A case? What are we, Charlie's Witches?
We don't work for him.
Phoebe: Well, apparently, he seems
to think that we do,
especially after
reminding me over and over
that he bailed us
out of our little jam.
Piper: That's blackmail.
Phoebe: No, that's your
taxpayer dollars at work.
Paige: Yeah, well, I can't. I have
to go deal with a charge.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no.
You're not dumping this
in my lap, missy.
I am very busy, too.
I have dates--
lots and lots of dates.
Piper: Are you trying
to get pregnant again?
Phoebe: No. I'm trying
to find love.
So I don't have any
more time than you guys do
to go through cold cases.
Paige: What do you mean
cold cases?
Phoebe: Well, there are cases
that Murphy seems to think
have some supernatural
angle to them,
so he wants us
to go through boxes
to see if
we can find any thing.
Piper: How many boxes? You have got to be kidding me.
THEME
Agent: Agent Murphy
says he wants you
to start with these.
They're rated para-7
suspicion and higher.
Piper:
Para-7?
Agent: Paranormal. Don't forget to wear protective gloves.
We don't want
the evidence tainted.
Phoebe: Wait a minute.
Where are you going?
Hey, you can't just
leave us here.
Piper: This can't be legal.
Phoebe: Well, apparently it is.
Let's just get this
over with so we can
find something.
Piper: You know, Agent Murphy can't make us
do this on a weekly basis.
It's boring.
Phoebe: Well, if he does,
we'll just turn him
into a frog or something.
[Cell phone rings]
Phoebe: Don't you answer that.
Piper: Hello.
Hey, how's it going?
Of course I can make it.
Phoebe: Piper, no, you cannot.
Piper: Ok, see you later.
I got to go.
It's Leo's music buddy.
He's trying to get me a band.
It's very, very important.
Phoebe: All right.
Piper: You should probably
leave those off
because you'll get
a premonition easier
without them.
Ok?
Um, so I'll be back
in a jiffy.
Phoebe: Ok.
See you later.
[Gloves snap]
Ow!
Zira: I need more power. You said you'd find it
for me by now.
Sollal:
I'm doing everything
I can, Zira.
I've got feelers
out everywhere.
Zira: I don't know how much longer
I could take answering
to that-- that brute,
let alone all the others.
I'm getting restless.
Sollal:
And I said
I'm working on it.
Tai:
Where's the potion?
Why isn't it ready yet?
Zira:
It will be, Tai.
I assure you.
Tai: It better be, or I'll find a new sorceress.
Zira: I'll show him and his kind
who's replaceable, even if I have to kill every last male demon to do it.
It's time
for females to rule.
Especially this female.
Professor: The battle of
the sexes is universal,
going back
to Adam and Eve.
In fact, men and women
are so different that you have to wonder
how we get along at all.
What stops us
from killing each other?
The yin/yang theory
explains it best.
Yang--male is cold,
hard, and
unbending. Yin--female.
Warm, soft, and yielding.
But...notice the dots.
A little bit of each
in the other for balance.
[Billie's Gum pops]
Professor: Billie, have
something to add?
Billie: No.
Nothing he'd wanna
hear anyways.
Professor: Try me.
Billie: OK, I think this
whole thing's just
little outdated.
It might used to have
been before clear-cut,
but now men are just wimps or thugs it's women
that are
balanced.
[ male student belches ]
Billie: Uh, I rest my case.
Professor: I see your point.
But like it or not,
behind every good man is
a good woman and vice versa.
We need each other.
Billie: Hardly.
I'm around amazing
women all the time
that don't need guys.
History proves
that women are
the stronger sex.
Let's think back
to goddesses, queens,
muses, witches--
Male student: Witches, women-- same difference.
Other male student: You don't mean witches.
You mean bi--
Female student: Shut up, sicko.
Billie: The only way there
will ever be any balance
is if women
get the chance to rule.
Professor: Except history
doesn't support your theory.
When either sex
becomes dominant,
it's a fiasco.
Billie: Yeah, for you guys.
Professor: No. For everyone.
We're different
for a reason.
Buy it or not,
the yin/yang theory will
be on the midterm today.
[All groaning]
[Cell phone]
Billie:
I'm sorry.
I gotta take this.
Phoebe? Hi.
Demons? Ok.
I'll just get a cab.
All right, bye.
Sorry. I got to go.
It's a family emergency.
[Student belches]
Piper: Well, the problem is
it's a catch-22.
No band wants to play
a club that hasn't had
a band in a while.
On the other hand,
I need a band.
Smitty: That is a problem.
Piper: Yes, but not an
insurmountable one, right?
Smitty: Yeah, it's true. You guys
have a great track record.
I mean, you-- you used
to boOK a lot of talent.
Piper: Uh-huh. And we still can.
It just takes one.
Smitty: You're not gonna get
a headliner.
Piper: Ok. Uh...well,
what if we do a benefit
for the hurricane victims?
Smitty: Maybe I can get you
a chick band,
but that's about it.
Piper: A chick band?
Smitty: But it won't help much
because there aren't
very many hip ones.
Piper: I'm sorry,
but there's a lot
of hugely successful
female
bands around
Smitty:
Yeah, but you're not
gonna get any of 'em.
Piper: Well, why not?
We used to.
Smitty: Whoa. Don't get
all emotional on me, baby.
Piper: Oh, no. This is
not emotional.
Would you like
to see emotional?
Because I can get emotional.
Leo: Smitty, bottom line is we
really could use your help,
so maybe there's somebody
who owes you a favor.
Piper: Oh, no. I don't need
no favors from him.
Smitty: Ok.
Oh, well, um, Liz Phair's
passing through town.
She likes a good charity.
But we'll talk later when
the ol' ball and chain
isn't around. [ Chuckles ]
Leo: All right.
Piper: Why were you
so nice to him?
Why did you
not throw him out
on his macho pig ass?
Leo: Because I'm trying
to get you a band. Smitty has a point.
The music business is
all about what's current.
Piper: Well, currently,
I am very irritated.
Leo: OK, well, then you need
to take a deep breath
and relax.
Piper: Oh, I see. Now you think I'm being overly
emotional.
Leo: [ Chuckles ] Not at all.
It's all good.
[Piper scoffs]
Phoebe: All I'm saying is
I have coffee at 6:00,
a dinner date at 8:00. So if Billie's not here--
Paige: Believe it or not,
I would rather be helping you
than be where I am right now.
Phoebe:
Why? Where are you?
Paige: I'm, uh...
on Skid Row,
trying to figure out
how to introduce myself
to my new charge.
Phoebe: Well,
what's stopping you?
Paige: Well, I have to wait
for the
other felon to leave first.
Phoebe: Why?
[Men arguing]
Paige: Apparently, this kid's
at a crossroads.
I'm supposed to help him
figure out how to make
the right choice,
like that's
gonna be real easy.
Phoebe: Well, back to our
little problem here.
Donnie: Don't tell me no, punk.
You owe me.
Paige: I got to go.
He's getting beat up. OK.
Phoebe: Wait.
But--
Speed: LoOK, I'm just trying to stay
out of trouble, Donnie,
that's all.
Donnie: Yeah? Well, you don't drive,
and you're gonna be in
a world of trouble with me.
You got that, Speed? Huh?!
Paige: Hey!
Donnie: You better
show up. Punk.
Paige: You OK?
Speed: Who are you?
Paige: Uh, I'm someone
who just saved you from
getting your ass kicked,
that's who I am.
Speed: Lady, I don't think so.
Paige: Speed, I know who
you are. I'm just
trying to help you.
Speed: What are you, my guardian
angel or something?
Paige: Yeah. Or something.
Speed:
Aw, shoot!
Paige: Wait!
Henry:
You dented my hood.
That's gonna cost you.
Speed: It wasn't what you think, all right?
The dude just tracked me down.
Paige: Leave him alone or
I'm gonna call the cops.
Henry:
Don't bother. That's
where he's headed already.
Paige: You're a parole officer?
Henry:
LoOK at that.
Your girlfriend can read, huh?
Paige: What'd he do?
Henry:
BrOKe parole.
Consorting with a known felon.
Speed: Man, that's
not what happened.
Come on, you gotta believe me.
Henry:
Actually, no, I don't.
I wouldn't hang around
out here, lady, if I were you. Not dressed like that.
[Tires screech]
Billie: Wow. These are
so Greta Garbo.
Hey, now
there's a woman
that didn't need a man
to make her feel complete.
Phoebe: Hey, Billie,
those are evidence, OK?
And not to mention
somebody probably
died in them.
Hello. No. I said
I'm dying to see you.
It just must be
a really bad connection.
Billie: Now, this is the kind
of bondage men want us in?
You know, I don't even know
why you bother hoOKing up.
After seeing this guy
in my class this morning,
I am so sure
women should be on top.
Phoebe: Do you mind?
Billie:
I'm sorry. I meant that
metaphorically.
Phoebe: Well, I'm speaking to a guy,
OK, and he means metaphysically.
Billie: Yeah, see,
that's the thing.
Men just keep using
their little heads
to do all
the thinking for them.
You know, this
whole yin/yang thing,
it's a complete hoax.
I mean, loOK at this lame gig.
Once again,
the male establishment
is using
women's skills
for their busywork.
Phoebe: You know what? I gotta go, OK?
Yeah, I can't wait
to see you, too. Sunday.
All right. Thanks. Bye.
Hey, can we lay off
the male bashing, please?
Billie: Sorry. I've just had one
too many lame dates lately.
I don't understand.
Everyone I go out with
is so immature and childish.
Does that ever change?
Do they ever grow up?
Phoebe: Well, if I ever
get outta here,
I'll let you know.
Billie: Hey. Check this thing out.
Phoebe: No, no. No.
Billie: Uh, what just happened?
Phoebe: We're screwed.
That's what happened.
[Catcalls]
Phoebe: This
is unbelievable.
Piper takes the car.
Paige orbs.
Does anyone
stop and think that
Phoebe can't orb?
No, of course not.
Why? Because
it's all about them.
Billie: OK, hi. Yeah. I can't
get this thing off.
Phoebe:
Yeah, don't even bother.
It's gonna take a spell
or a potion or some kind
of emotional epiphany.
Billie: That blows.
Are you sure?
Phoebe: Hello!
Voice of experience.
I've been turned
into a mermaid,
a mummy, a genie, OK?
Trust me.
I know these things.
Billie: I can't believe this.
I feel so stupid.
I had to put the belt on.
Phoebe: It's OK. Just think
of it as initiation.
It happens
to the best of us.
Billie:
So it's not that bad?
Phoebe: Oh, no. It's bad.
It's very, very bad.
[Catcall]
Billie: Please, someone
vanquish me now.
Phoebe: Ok, we got to get you
out of here. Hey, taxi!
[Both gasp]
Taxi driver: What the hell did
you do to my cab?
Phoebe: Put it back,
put it back.
Put it back.
Let's go. Let's go.
[Crash]
Sollal:
A dormant power's
just been activated.
Zira: What do you mean dormant?
Sollal:
Well, judging
by its intensity and
frequency of the emissions,
I thought it was
the Crystal of Kazimar.
But it's even
more powerful than that. The Golden Belt of Gaea.
Zira: "The goddesses' gift to Hippolyta
endows the woman wearing it
with transcendent powers." I'm sold. How do I get it?
Sollal:
Trust me. You don't want it. It would destroy you
the moment you put it on.
You're evil.
Zira: Then what good is it to me?
Sollal:
Well, you could still appropriate its powers
getting the woman
who's wearing it
to do your bidding
for you.
Zira: How,
if she's good?
Sollal:
The belt's power
will compel her
to use its force
whether she
wants to or not.
In time, it'll drive her
to madness, consume her.
Of course, if you were
to befriend her before that...
Zira: Then I can get her
to use the powers for me,
to get rid of Tai.
How do we find her?
Paige: Before you peeled
out of there,
you nearly hit me.
Henry: Oh. Sorry about that.
Paige: Oh.
Henry: Is that what you came
all the way down here for?
Paige: Yeah. That and just to,
you know, check and see
how
Speed's doing.
Henry: let me guess. Missionary?
Social worker?
Do-gooder?
Paige: Homeland Security, actually.
Henry: Really?
Paige: Mm-hmm. Check it out
if you want.
Henry: All right, I think I will.
So what
does Homeland
Security want
with a street
thug like Speed?
Paige: He's not a thug.
He's a kid.
Henry: Oh, no, no. No. He's 18.
Paige: Barely.
Henry: Well,
barely counts, and
he's gonna
learn that.
Paige: Well, where's he supposed
to learn that? In jail?
Henry: No. We try to scare him
so that maybe he won't
go back to jail.
Frank: Here you go, Henry.
He's all yours.
Henry: Thanks, Frank.
Paige: What's she
doing here?
Henry: She's looking out for you,
so don't let her down.
Hey, from now on,
it's for real. You got that?
No more juvie passes.
Next time it counts.
Speed: Yeah,
yeah, yeah.
Henry: You feds better keep
your books open on this one.
Ing tells me
you're gonna see him again.
Paige: No. We won't. He's
destined for greatness.
Speed: You hear that?
I'm destined for greatness.
Henry: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you don't make
your 4:00 check-in with me,
you're gonna
be destined for prison.
Go on. I'm gonna take you home.
Piper: How many times
do I have to say it?
I'd rather lose the club
than have somebody
like Smitty help me out.
Leo: OK, but you're letting your
feelings about the guy get
in the way of good business.
Piper: Oh, so, basically,
you agree with
him. Now not only am I emotional, but I am also, in fact, stupid.
Leo:
That's not what I meant.
Piper: You know what?
At least I hold on
to my principles.
Leo: OK, you know what, let's stop
with the mudslinging and
think about this rationally.
Piper: Oh. So now I'm irrational?
Leo:
No. Yes. You're
being irrational. Smitty has
amazing connections.
It doesn't make sense
to alienate him.
Piper: OK, fine. You know what?
You deal with him,
man to man, all right?
More power to you.
[Door hinges crack]
Billie: Sorry.
Piper: Oh...
Phoebe:
Yeah, she's a superhero.
But, no, you
can't get mad at her
because it's your fault.
Piper:
My fault?
Phoebe: Yeah, she tried on a belt
in one of the boxes
that you were supposed
to be going through.
Billie: I couldn't help myself.
Piper:
Oh, no. Really?
Phoebe: OK, enough with the chatter.
We have to figure out
how to get it off of her.
Leo:
It's not gonna be easy.
That looks like Hippolyta's belt.
Piper:
Hippo-who?
Billie: W-wait. I know her
from my
anthology class. Greek queen. Super powerful.
Wanted to create
men and women equal.
Wait a second.
Didn't Hercules butcher her?
Leo:
That's the one.
Billie: Oh, that's just great.
Piper:
Oh, no. Why did you
go and do that?
Who's gonna
pick up the kids?
Leo: What do you mean?
Phoebe:
Leo, look at yourself.
Leo: Ohh.
Piper: All right, turn him back. Right now.
Billie: I don't know how.
I didn't do it. This did it.
Piper:
Huh. All right.
Fine.
Billie: Did you just
try and kill me?
Piper: Go
easy.
Phoebe:
Billie, relax.
Of course not.
What's the matter
with you?
Billie: I don't know. That was really weird.
Please get this off me.
Phoebe: To the book.
Piper: All right. What aren't you telling us?
And don't think just
because you're invisible
that I won't--
Leo: OK. I know the goddesses
who made the belt
came up with a way
to
take it off.
But if we can't figure out what that was,
Billie's gonna die.
Piper: Oh, Like the woman who wore it before,
who ended up in Murphy's cold case.
Leo:
Probably. I mean, the belt holds
enormous power, Piper.
It seduces the wearer
before it drives her insane.
Piper: We gotta fix this
before it goes horribly wrong.
Leo:
Like it's not already.
Piper:
All right, that's not funny.
Move it. Move.
Mm.
Tai: Where's this belt?
Zira:
It won't just come
to you on its own, Tai. It must be lured.
She must be lured.
Tai: How?
Zira:
By attacking
an innocent, a female.
But it must be more
than just an attack.
You'll need
to torment her
if you wish to compel
the mistress of the belt
to come to her aid.
Tai:
I brought my demons here
to torment one innocent?
Zira:
No. You brought them here
to help you get power beyond your imagination.
Imagine your status in the underworld
when you bring
such a trophy back.
All will bow to you. If, of course, you can
take the belt away from her.
It won't be easy.
Tai:
I think I can handle
one lousy woman.
Zira:
Oh, so strong.
Still, better safe
than sorry.
I'll prepare
for the belt's arrival.
Phoebe:
Ok, you just sit down
right here and relax
until we can
figure out a way
to get that thing off you.
Piper: If we can.
If we can, we should soon
before she turns
any more men invisible.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Well, you and I both know
something horrible
is gonna have
to happen
before we can get her
out of that get-up.
Billie: Ohhh!
I scratched
my pretty belt.
Piper:
Oh, dear. Now
it's her "pretty belt."
Billie: What does that mean?
Phoebe:
It just means
that maybe the belt is
starting to affect you.
Billie: I don't think the belt
is starting to affect me.
OK? I would know if--
oh, hold on.
I think
I'm getting a call.
Piper:
A call?
Billie: Yeah.
I'll be right back.
Phoebe:
Oh!
[Leo grunts]
Leo: Whoa!
Anybody? Help? Anybody?
Tai:
Over here...
we're coming for you.
Girl:
Dear God, help!
Billie: That's no way
to treat a woman.
Tai:
Get the belt.
Billie: I don't think so.
Men.
Piper: Sweetie? Honey? Are you all right?
Leo: Yeah, except for the fact nobody can see me.
Phoebe: And the fact that the girl that did it you is out doing God knows
what. We have to find her.
Leo: Whoa! Watch the door...
Bilie: Um, sorry, I'm still getting used to this blurring thing, but oh,
is it fun!
Phoebe: Fun? You're having fun? We were worried about you.
Where have you been?
Billie: Well, let's see.
I rescued a woman distress,
I killed off
a bunch of male demons,
and I scratched
my pretty belt again.
Phoebe:
OK, Billie, I think
you're getting a little
too attached to that thing.
Piper: Yeah, until
we get it off,
maybe you should kind of stay put.
Billie: No, I don't wanna take it off.
It makes me feel powerful.
Leo: See
that's a problem.
Piper:
Actually,
here's a problem.
[Ring]
Piper: Why are men
so threatened
by powerful women?
Phoebe:
Hey, look, I'm busy.
I'll call you
when I have time.
There is nothing worse
than a needy guy.
Piper:
Right.
Leo: Uh, ladies,
I think the belt's affecting you, too.
Piper:
Oh, shush it, will you?
Phoebe: Is there any way you can
make his voice disappear?
Leo: Which means
it's growing stronger.
Billie:
Oh, you are
such a downer.
No wonder
I made you
invisible.
Oops. My midterm.
Almost forgot.
Piper: Oh, hey, could you make Leo
visible again before go?
Phoebe: Really? Why?
Piper:
Well, he's gotta play golf apparently
to get me a band.
So what can I tell you?
It's a man's world.
[Leo chuckling]
Billie: Tsk. I guess I can try.
Billie: Oh, it worked. Right on.
Piper:
What the hell
just happened?
Phoebe:
I think her powers
are getting stronger.
Leo: And taking her over.
Piper: Well, then
we have to stop her her
Zira: He wants to go
after her again.
I can't hold him off
much longer.
Why didn't it work?
Why didn't she kill him?
Sollal: I'm telling you,
we're almost there.
Zira: How do you figure? Tai's alive. Male demons
are still
in control,
but I don't see
any Wonder Witch here
to help me change things.
Sollal: She killed his gang,
didn't she?
That means the belt's hold
on her is strengthening.
Now, soon she'll be
so intoxicated by it,
you'll be able to make
your move, turn her.
Zira: Not if Tai kills me first.
Sollal: Then use your wiles
to hold him at bay
until I can find her.
She will be yours for
the taking in no time.
Zira: You'd better be right...
or else there'll be
one more male demon to become extinct.
[Knock on door]
Paige: Speed.
Finally.
Where have you been?
Henry: What are you doing here?
Paige: What are you doing here?
Henry: I'm supposed to be here.
I'm the parole officer,
remember? How did you get in?
That door was locked.
Paige: I have my ways.
Henry: Really?
Oh, I'm listening.
Paige: Look--
Henry: No. You look. I don't
know what your name is.
Paige: My name is Paige.
Henry: Ok, Paige.
Well, I have a job to do
and a
parolee to bust. Now, what do you know
about all that?
Paige: I don't know anything about all that. I just came here to talk to
him, OK?
Henry: Talk about what?
Paige: Talk about his future. You know,
how not to blow it.
Henry: And you think that
that's all it's gonna take
to keep him out of trouble?
Just some talk?
Paige: Well, it's a start,
isn't it?
Henry: Why do you believe
in him so much?
Paige: Why don't you?
Henry: No, I used to,
for the last 10 years.
But I'm getting pretty tired
of trying
to save his
useless ass.
Paige: Great. Don't. I'll do it.
Henry: You'll do it?
Paige: Mm-hmm.
Henry: You're a little late.
Paige: What do you mean?
Henry: I mean, he's not here,
is he? No. Which means he's with
Donnie, which means Donnie
talked him into the job.
Paige: Jobs are good things.
Henry: Not that kind of a job.
Robbing a liquor store.
Yeah. That's right. And
the cops know all about it.
And they're gonna
bust him in the act.
.
Paige: No, no. Speed's
not gonna be there.
Henry: I got 20 bucks
says he will.
Paige: I have 20 that says
he won't. You're on.
Henry: Let's go.
Paige: Where?
Henry: And prove you wrong.
After you.
Professor: 20 minutes, guys.
20 minutes.
Female student: Talk about tacky.
Male student #1: Hey, Super Babe.
Male student #2: I could use some action.
Professor: Shh, shh, shh, shh. Test half over.
Time you have left,
you'll be lucky
to get a "C."
Billie: Wouldn't expect anything more
from a sexist pig like you.
Class: Ohh.
Professor: Excuse me?
Billie: Well, you have to admit
your theories
are slanted to more
of a male perspective.
Professor: So is the superhero
costume a comment
on the male hierarchy?
I assume you're
making a statement.
Male student: Yeah, that she's hot.
Female student: Shut up, pig! What are you
laughing at?
Male student: Ok. Chill out.
Huh?
Wait. Stop.
Professor: This
isn't necessary--
aah!
Billie: This isn't right.
Zira: This isn't what
you wanted, is
it?
I can help you.
Billie: Who are you?
Zira: Someone who understands.
Come with me...
and all your questions
will be answered.
Piper: I can't believe we missed her.
Phoebe: Well, at least she left
there before the entire class
killed each other.
Piper: You mean before the girls killed the boys.
Leo: Sounds like history's
repeating itself. Hippolyta
tried to use the belt
to create harmony
between the sexes.
It blew up in her face, too.
Phoebe: Dare I ask
what happened next?
Leo: Well, she retreated
to an island of women,
killing any man
who dared enter.
Piper: Well, one must
have gotten through
because Billie said
Hercules killed her.
Leo: Which is why everyone who's
worn the belt since
has tried to rid
the entire world of men.
Phoebe: Oh, great. Just when
I start dating again.
Piper: You know, that means Wyatt and Chris, too.
Phoebe: Oh, come on.
What are the possibilities
of
this really happening?
Other people have worn
the belt before and men
are still walking around.
Leo: But Billie was
a powerful witch before
she put the belt on,
which pretty much
makes her invincible.
She could do it, or at least, kill
a lot of men trying.
Piper: So, what, our only hope
is that the belt
drives her insane
and kills her first?
Leo: No, we have to figure
out a way to get
the belt off of her,
and contain her,
obviously, so she
doesn't do any harm.
Piper: If we can find her.
Leo: I guess I won't be golfing after all.
Piper: No. Actually,
I think you should.
You're the target.
I want you
as far away as possible.
Leo: Yes, but you're vulnerable
to the belt's powers.
I'm not.
Piper: Yeah, I-- I know, but now
that we know what to expect,
we'll keep our distance,
I promise. Now, really, you should go,
and if, you know, you find me a band
in the process,
that wouldn't be
such a bad thing,
Zira: Don't you see?
Women have evolved while
men have grown more barbaric.
Your destiny
is to unite women--
bring peace into the world,
and I can help.
Billie: But you're a demon.
Zira: But I don't want to be.
Nor with your powers
will I have to be any longer.
This whole
good-versus-evil paradigm--
it's all been fostered
by men to divide us
because they
can't create life.
So they try to destroy it.
Billie: I don't know.
Zira: Oh, think about it. We're at magic school.
It's filled with demons,
which means if I wanted
you dead, you would be.
Billie: What do you want?
Zira: Peace.
Harmony.
Just...like...you.
With women ruling,
good and evil goes away.
All walks of life
live as one.
Of course, we may have
to kill a few...de-men
in the process.
But that's
where you come in.
Billie: I should talk
to the sisters first.
Zira: They don't believe in
a women's utopia like we do.
They're stuck in
the old ways.
Battles.
Billie: No. No, they're
very strong women.
Zira: Who have been corrupted
by the male hierarchy.
They're scared of change.
They'd do anything to stop you,
which is why it's so important
we take over magic school,
make it our base.
Peace.
Unity.
Think about it.
Sollal: She's not well.
She'll be dead soon.
Zira: She just needs
to live long enough
to kill Tai.
Then no one will
dare challenge me.
[Paige groans]
Henry: You all right?
Paige: Yeah. I just have to go
to the bathroom is all.
Henry: Oh. Why didn't you say so?
Here you go. I won't look.
Paige: That's disgusting.
Henry: First stakeout, huh?
Paige: No. I've been
on lots of stakeouts.
What?
Henry: I don't know.
Still trying
to figure you out.
Paige: Why?
Henry: 'Cause I can't.
That's why.
I do like
a challenge, though.
Dispatch: Suspect vehicle
approaching south
on Larson. Over.
Suspect vehicle
is in position,
2 black males considered
armed and dangerous.
Stand by. Over.
Henry: Damn. It looks like
you lost our bet.
Paige: He hasn't
done anything yet.
Henry: Boy, you are
an optimist, huh?
Paige: No. I just have faith.
Henry: Yeah.
So do I.
Donnie: Yo. Chill, dog.
Speed: Look, I don't
wanna be doing this.
Donnie: Yeah? Well, it's too late.
What are you waiting for?
Drive to the front.
Speed: I can't, man. I don't wanna
be doing this. I can't.
Donnie: The hell you can't.
Drive, damn it.
[Burglar alarm sounds]
Dispatch: All units
engage, engage!
Henry: Stay here.
Son of a bitch.
Aah!
[Tires screech]
Policeman: Police! Freeze!
Don't move!
Henry: You owe me 20 bucks.
Phoebe: This isn't working.
Either super Billie's
completely taken over
or she just doesn't
wanna be found.
Piper: Well, we could
try the "to call
a lost witch" spell.
If there's any witch
left in her,
it should bring her back here whether
she likes it or not.
Phoebe: Well, what if
that doesn't work?
Piper: Well, then mankind has
got a serious problem.
Phoebe:
Oh, I should've
stopped her.
Piper: Don't worry about it.
It's a job hazard.
It would've happened
sooner or later.
Phoebe: She's gonna be pretty upset
when she comes back here.
Do you think
we should call for Paige?
Piper: No. She's got
her own innocent to save.
Besides, if Billie gets here
and we can't handle it,
we'll call for her.
Both: "Power
of the witches rise,
course unseen
across the skies.
Come to us
who care,
come to us
and settle here."
Billie: What did you do that for?
Phoebe: We we just worried about you, that's all.
Billie: That's bull. You just don't want me to create my utopia.
Piper: Your what?
Phoebe: Are you kidding?
We love utopias.
I mean, we're witches
you know.
We're into
the girl power.
Billie: Fine.
What do you want?
Phoebe: We just wanna talk, see
how you're doing.
Piper: Now!
Billie: Aah! You lied to me! Zira was right.
Phoebe: Zira?
[Billie shouting]
[Grunts]
There's no wrath
like a woman scorned.
Piper: Huh.
We have got to find her
and bring her back here
'cause I am not
cleaning up this mess.
Billie: Zira.
I'm all yours.
Phoebe: So, maybe we could
try the spell again
and bring her back.
Piper: And do what with her,
watch her destroy the rest of the house?
I mean, we can't contain her.
Phoebe: There's
gotta be a way.
Leo: Hey. I, uh,
guess Billie's still
wearing the belt, huh?
Piper: You think?
Phoebe: Oh, nice.
You're out playing golf
while we're trying
to save your gender.
Piper: No. I told him to,
and it's a good
thing I did,
because Billie
might have
killed you.
Leo: She's getting worse,
isn't e?
Phoebe: Yeah, And she's teamed up with a demon.
If I were a guy,
I'd definitely be
a little nervous.
Leo: Any chance that she went
back to magic school?
Piper: Maybe. Why?
Leo: Well, because if they did,
we might be able to get
the belt off her there. The goddesses' spell's
got to be in one
of the history books.
Piper: It's gonna be
pretty tough to
get by her unseen.
Leo: Well, I think
unseen is the answer.
Henry: You wouldn't listen to me, huh?
Just had to go and
do
something stupid.
Paige: Hey, easy.
Speed: Oh, man,
you don't understand.
Henry:
No, I understand.
You screwed up.
That's what I understand.
Paige: Why don't you just listen
to what he has to say?
Henry: I don't like this
any better than you do, OK?
I don't have any choice.
He's an accessory to robbery,
and I'm gonna take him in.
Speed: I'm telling you,
that's not the way
it went down.
Henry: OK. Well, why don't you
tell that to the judge?
Paige: Wait. What happened?
Henry: What happened to you?
Speed: That was
tell you.
Donnie stuck me
'cause I wouldn't drive.
Henry: Then what the hell
were you doing there? Huh?
Speed: Just forget it, man.
Paige: No. No. If what he's
saying is the truth,
then that
makes him innocent.
Henry: That's not my call.
Paige: Actually, it is
your call whether
you take him in or not.
Look, why don't you check
the other guy's knife?
If his blood is on it, then he's exonerated.
Henry: Let's go. Excuse us.
[ Paige's cell phone rings]
Paige: What?
Tai: You set me up.
Zira: It's called evolution, Tai.
Your kind's irrelevant.
Tai: You fool.
She's just using you. There's no battle
of the sexes.
The eternal fighl is
between good and evil.
Zira: I can't believe
he's finally dead.
It's almost anticlimactic.
Sollal: Is he
really gone?
Zira: You missed one
Sollal: Ah!
Billie sSighs]
Zira: Are you all right?
You don't look well.
Billie: I don't feel very good.
Zira: It's all right.
You just rest.
It'll be all over
soon. I promise.
Phoebe: Sooner than you think.
Billie: What are you doing here?
Piper: Oh, we've come to save you.
Paige: Again.
Zira: You can't save her.
It's too late.
Piper: Wanna bet?
Paige: Book.
Zira: They're after your belt.
Kill them.
Piper: Leo!
Leo: Nooooo!
Say the damn spell!
Paige: "For all the world
to work as one,
in harmony
it must be undone." Belt!
Zira: Uh-oh.
[Paige sighs]
Piper: All right. Come out,
come out, wherever you are. Huh. It's nice to see you.
Leo: It's good to be seen.
Billie: What happened?
Paige: Leo, uh,
just saved your life.
Phoebe: Yin/yang
working together,
just like it should be.
[Billie sighs]
Piper: Good job, yang.
Leo: [Chuckles] Thanks, yin.
Speed: What are
we doing?
Henry: Yeah, inspector. It's Henry.
Hey, by any chance
did that kidDdonnie
have a knife on him
when he was arrested?
It had blood on it?
No, no, no. It's nothing.
I was just curious.
Thanks.
Turn around.
Speed: What's up?
Henry: I'm letting you go.
That's what's up.
Speed: Wait. So-so you mean
you believe me?
Henry: This time.
Go.
[Cell phone rings]
Paige: Hello.
Henry: So do you want cash,
or can I send you a check?
Paige: Henry?
Henry: You were right
about the kid.
He was clean.
Paige: How did you
get my number?
Henry: Oh, you're
not the only one
with connections.
Paige: I see.
Henry: Hey, Speed owes you.
I--I owe you, too.
Paige: Just doing my job.
Henry: Well...
good night.
Paige: Good night.
Piper: That better be
a virgin colada.
I don't wanna
lose my license
the same night
I land Liz Phair.
Billie: Don't worry. I think
I've caused enough trouble
for you guys for one day.
Phoebe: You were bound to turn
into something eventually.
Billie: Yeah. But Wonder Witch?
Not to mention
I almost terminated
an entire gender.
Phoebe: Yeah, but the point
is you didn't.
Piper: Thankfully.
Billie: Yeah, I just
wish I still wasn't
so confused
about men.
Phoebe: Don't worry. They're
just as confused about us.
Billie: I know, but I'm
still a little gun-shy.
Phoebe: It's OK. You have time.
Emcee: Ladies and gentlemen,
put your hands together.
Welcome to P-3 Liz Phair!
Billie: I still can't believe Leo got her.
Piper: Yeah. Guys. Golf.
Go figure.
Phoebe: To the mystery
of men.
I'm so far, far,
so far away it now
that it seems like
I may never know how
people stay in love
for half of their lives
it's a secret they keep
between the husbands and wives
baby, there goes
somebody's miracle
walkin' down the street
there goes
some other fairy tale
I wish it could happen to me
but I look at myself
and I think,
what the hell?
Maybe I'm just too naive
to have such faith in myself
We don't read the guestbook very often, so please don't
post QUESTIONS, only COMMENTS, if you want an answer. Feel free to email us
with your questions by clicking on the Feedback link above! PLEASE SIGN-->