"Forgiveness is my middle name! Well, actually it's
LaVelle, and I'd appreciate it if you guard that secret with your life."
"It's horrible! That's me as a vampire? I'm so
evil and... skanky. And I think I'm kinda gay."
"I have come to redefine the words pain and suffering
since I fell in love with you."
"Ground cloven hooves are 30 per cent off. The whole
ones are full price."
"Are you protecting vampires? Are you the bad slayer
now? Am I the good slayer now?"
"Do I have bad hair? I don't look like scary mom, do I?"
"You know, I'm not the shortest one here. I don't
know why I had to be in the kid coffin."
"To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an
animal. It's a ritual sacrifice, with pie"
"I'm aware. I know every molecule of myself and
everything around me. No one, no human, no demon has ever been as awake and
alive as I am. You are all just shadows."