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Dr. Strange(r Things is on Netflix) or:
How I Learned to Stop Paying For Cable and Love the
I haven't owned a television in over nine years. Oh,
wait, I take that back. I did own one in 2012, but that was
only because my grandmother told me she had a TV wasting
space in her living room that she needed to get rid of. So I
loaded it into my car. It sat in the backseat as I drove it
to a dumpster. So as a technicality, I did own that
television, for about 15 minutes, before I threw it in the
"Why would you throw a television in the
trash?" isn't the question you should be asking. "Why
wouldn't you?" is the proper inquiry here.
People I meet
tell me stories about the bills they have to pay. Rent, I
understand. Paying your mortgage, yep. Makes sense to me.
Electricity. Yes. Internet. Definitely! These are all very
But cable television? This is
where it all goes wrong.
A cable company charges
something like $200 a month to give you access to hundreds
of channels you'll never watch. $200 for the experience of
scrolling through a sea of inanity. And then when you do
find a good show to watch, you have to sit through the
commercials. Of course you can always pause your TV for 10
minutes before starting the show and then when the
commercial break starts, you can fast forward through it.
You can do that if you want, trick the system. But that
trick isn't big enough. I say, do the biggest trick you can,
which is not paying for it to begin with.
knows that the best shows are on Netflix. Stranger Things.
Black Mirror. Daredevil. Orange is the New Black. The Joy of
Painting with Bob Ross. Guess what cable channel Netflix is
on? I'll give you a hint. It's not a number. It's a word. A
word called "Internet". That's all your cable box is,
anyway. A machine that lets you log on to a very particular
and extremely limited "internet".
Besides original shows from Netflix, you can also get
many great TV broadcast and cable shows like "The Flash",
"The Good Place", "Outlander" or "You're the Worst."
These aren't the analog days where video signals are
reaching your screen with the help of some metal antennas
atop your TV. This is the awful digital future that all the
prophecies foretold. This is the future where people
willingly pay $200 a month to have channels they don't need
rather than just paying for an internet connection and a
That's why I threw the
television away, and why you should throw yours away, too.
Hell, let's toss them all into one big pile and say "the
internet told me to". Because it did, just now.
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Page updated 11/2/17