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Passions Article


Shirley's Opinions

By Shirley

4/11 - 4/15/05

Wow!! Just when I was hating Gwen more than I thought humanly possible, Theresa turns around and does something so abysmally stupid that I can almost see Gwen's side of things. Now, that was a minor miracle. But she did it, not more than 10 or 15 minutes after she got full and complete custody of her daughter, with no threat from Gwen hanging over her head - or so it seemed. I guess we'll have to wait and see where that would have gone, but at the time, it all seemed to have been worked out. Is this getting as tiresome for you as it is for me?

This week seems to have been a good one in several ways, although there were some things that didn't work out so well for our favorite Harmony-ites. Fox and Ethan found Katherine, Gwen, and Jane, Theresa was reunited with her kidnapped daughter, Tabitha had a fun time, although it was at other's expense, and Whitney's baby was assured of being adopted quickly and by someone who really wants him. This should have been a week to crow about, but it turned quickly and inexplicably sour by week's end. I guess we should have known, right?

This was the week when Beth was finally bullied into letting Sheridan and Luis do a DNA test on Marty to see who his real mother is. Now, this should be a good thing, right? I mean, Luis actually began to suspect Beth of wrongdoing for once, and that's something I thought would never happen, and it looked like we were on the way to getting Marty back to his real mother at long last, meaning at least a little while of happiness for one of the most put-upon female characters in daytime history, even beating that woman in the old Saturday Serials that was left falling over a cliff, or blowing up in an explosion, or something just as dire at the end of each week's episode. I grew up thinking this was the most unlucky woman in the history of the world, but then I "met" Sheridan Crane. I mean, at least that woman was miraculously rescued at the beginning of the next week's show, while Sheridan never catches a real break. Every thing that looks like a break actually turns out to be just another slap in the face for her, so I am not holding out much hope for a good ending here, either. Oh, had they done the test and gotten the results back on the same day, or even the next, I might have thought there was a chance it would be a good ending, but it's going to take a week to get them, so I know Alistair will dip his hand in somewhere and gum up the works, leaving Sheridan crying and in pain yet again. I say, enough already!! I wrote a letter to NBC telling them what I think about their handling of this show, and it wasn't a happy note, either. Do I think they will read it? Not really. If they do, do I think they will take it into consideration? Not likely. It was simply an act of total frustration on my part, but it did help to get it all out. Well, most all of it, anyway. If anyone reading this is as upset as I am at the way this show keeps cheating us out of the payoffs we all watch for, send an e-mail of your own. Maybe if they get enough of them they'll realize we are not happy with the way things go and will stop watching if something isn't done.

OK, now on to the heroic rescue. Ethan and Theresa managed to find the island, land on it, and get through all the contraptions and guards to get into the compound. Don't ask me how they could do it when Interpol and others couldn't, I don't question it. I just accept it happened and put my doubts completely out of my mind. So, anyway, they manage to get in, and then she goes in search of her baby, finding her on the first try, mind you, while Ethan went in search of Fox in the basement/dungeon. Fox, meanwhile, had tricked his guard and escaped from the "cell" he was held in, and he and Ethan met up and started on their quest to find the women and get the heck out of Dodge. Now, excuse me for being picky, but just when did Fox learn Kung Fu or whatever it was he was using on those guards? He was a one man wrecking machine, wasn't he? Man, he was going through all those guards like crazy, which was a good thing, since they kept running into them at every corner. He was a man on a mission, and determined to succeed. But, when it came to chambering a bullet in the gun he lifted from one of his opponents, he couldn't figure it out for beans. Ethan had to step in and do it for him. No matter, our heroic Fox managed to get them safely through the fray to the women and baby in record time. And he did all this while stopping every two minutes to push Ethan for an answer to which woman he was going to choose to be with once they were home. Amazing. Anyway, they made it to the women at last, arriving just after Theresa had defended herself with a masterful right hand punch that left Gwen in a heap on the floor. We will never know if the pity Ethan felt at seeing her like that weighed in on his decision, but he ended up choosing her - again. Poor Theresa, she's been attacked several times by Gwen, accused of killing Gwen's first baby because she defended herself from a tackle and choking by her, almost killed by her several times and left paralyzed for a while during the last attempt, had her son taken from her by the Gwinch and her slutty mother, and teased and led on by Ethan like a puppy being taunted by a steak the neighborhood bully will never let him have, only to have him choose Gwen every time, even tho the whole world knows he really loves Theresa, not Gwen. I guess I can't blame her for being as idiotic as she is under the circumstances, but you really would think she'd learn. This time, once Ethan chose Gwen, she grabbed on to him like a leech, smirking at Theresa like a demented Cheshire Cat, and then announced that she was going to have Ethan uphold the contract Theresa was tricked into signing giving up all claim to the surrogate child she was carrying. Of course, Jane isn't the surrogate baby, but that doesn't matter to Gwen. All that matters is that she get her way in everything, or else she'll throw tantrums until she does. God, I hate her so much. I have never hated a character on a show as much as I do her, you know? I think this show is making me crazy, to tell the truth, and I really need to stop watching it. LOL!! Anyway, Ethan manages to talk her out of it for now by getting Theresa to promise not to press charges against Gwen for trying to murder her twice and kidnapping her baby. So now, even tho Theresa has lost Ethan for good (oh, yeah, right!), she at least has both her kids back and that should be enough, especially since she has to see what a tease and a useless boob he is - doesn't she? But no, she has to start another scheme to get Ethan back, telling Fox she will press those charges against Gwen and put her in jail for 35 years or so, and that way she'll have Ethan all to herself for all those years. Somebody tell me what the heck is wrong with that girl? She is willing to lose her kids just so she can have a man who has shown he has no intention of letting Gwen go, no matter whether he really loves her or not, and that simply makes no sense in the normal world. Theresa, let the fool go! He's not worth the time and trouble, and he's certainly not worth losing your children over. And anyway, who says Gwen will go to jail? She won't, of course, and it's just the opening she needs to make sure she gets the kids. Now, I believe she and her mother would have come up with a way to do that anyway, since I don't believe she will ever give up on it, but Theresa doesn't need to help them accomplish that. She'll never learn! Now, on a different vein, what was up with Katherine? She was yelling at Theresa that she had killed Gwen, without even checking to see if she was still alive or not. I wonder how her willingness to take Gwen's side over his daughter's will sit with Martin once he hears about it? Oh, right. He won't care. Katherine can do no wrong.

Now, on to the Russell/Harris baby. At week's end we saw that Eve and Julian, TC and Liz, and a surprise guest had all submitted paperwork to adopt Whitney's baby. I am certain, from what I've read and heard, that Adopter # 3 is Chad, so that will make for some very contentious times, I believe. Now, once Fox gets back, he's supposed to try to rescind his signature that Whitney made with his Power of Attorney and it's going to get really good, I think. I think the agent was totally right in his assessment that this particular baby having three applications for adoption is something you just don't see every day. I can just see all the angry confrontations between the three, tho, once they learn who the other applicants are. TC will be slugging Julian and Chad, Liz will be accusing Eve of causing it all, and Eve....well, she'll probably be standing there looking guilty, weakly trying to say she didn't do anything but not managing to convince anyone of that. Whitney will simply stand back and watch it all, never speaking up to defend her mother or let them know why she put the baby up for adoption in the first place. Now, Chad will do some punching, I'm sure, and some rational reasoning, but to tell the truth, I hope he is the one who gets the baby. Can you imagine the tension and fireworks between him and Fox if it happens that he gets to adopt the son Fox thinks is his? Oh, man, that will really be a good one. I just wish he would get so angry and Whitney that he finally realizes he never really loved her at all and then he turns to Theresa and together they heal each other's pain and fall in love, raising Little Ethan and Jane together, as a family. Now, that would be a happy ending in my book. It's too bad that means it will never happen. I was impressed with Simone's words to Whitney, too. She laid into her for abandoning her own child and for the first time in a long time I actually liked her. Now, after she read Whitney the Riot Act, she took off, having come up with a plan of her own, and I am wondering what that plan might be. I know she can't try to adopt the baby, she's too young, unmarried, and unemployed, as far as I know. I guess she could be on her way to talk one of her parent's into adopting it, even tho they have both already thought of that, but it seems like the most logical thing to have happen, at least in my opinion. I hope they let us in on her plan next week and not leave her off screen for another month or two while the baby's future is worked out without her.

I have to mention Jessica, too. I am so ready to turn that girl over my knee and spank her until she can't sit down for a week. Can you believe how rude and utterly evil she has become? And Ivy just sits there and takes it! I tell you what, if she really did care about the girl nothing else would matter to her but getting her the help she needs. So Jessica wants to expose her for the lying manipulator she really is, so what? Let her. It's time she owned up to what she's done, and if it saves Jessica from doing anything worse to herself, it would be worth it. I just can't see allowing a child to act the way Jessica is and do nothing but cower from her. It just makes it all worse in the long run. Now, don't get me started on how sweet little Jess turned into the Exorcist girl overnight because I simply have no idea, but what I do know is, she needs to be stopped now, no matter what the consequences to the adults is. It's like my mom used to tell my brother and me: Don't do anything you don't want anyone else to know about, because it will come to light in the end. There really are no secrets, you know? It's time Ivy's hens came home to roost, anyway. She's gotten away with far too much over the years and she needs to pay, as do Beth, Rebecca, and Gwen. Now, before you ask why I didn't add Theresa to that list, is there anyone out there who can honestly say Theresa has ever gotten away with anything she's done? Not even. That girl is caught in everything, and she's paid dearly for it all, while the others have never been held to account for one single thing they've ever done. It's time, you know? As for Tabitha, I just don't think the people of Harmony are smart enough to figure out all she's done. I mean, here's this woman who's lived in the same town all her life, and looked the same way for years, yet no one has realized something is wrong with that? Oh, sure, you have someone occasionally who wonders at the fact she looked the same way when they were little kids, but it never makes them curious to find out just what's going on with her. No, she'll never be caught, and she'll never pay for her evil ways, so I don't even worry about her. The others, tho - they need to be caught. Alistair has been caught, but no one can do anything to him about it, apparently, so I don't count him either, by the way.

OK, that's my thoughts on the show this week. I know I sound very pessimistic, but then, I've been watching this show since it started and there is nothing that makes me optimistic any more. I've learned the hard way that thinking something was going to change at last only gets you more upset when you find out it was all a tease and nothing - absolutely nothing - will ever change, except when an actor moves on. Then they just bring in another actor and have them say the same lines over and over the old actor did, or they send the character off on a journey and never bring them home. No, pessimism is the best way to face this show, until you just get so bitter and bone tired of the same plots day after day and it becomes easier to just stop watching. I have gotten a good supply of books, so I'm ready to fill that one hour slot with some really good stories in book form any day now. I can feel it coming closer and closer, so I know it won't be long now. Maybe next Friday will be my last day, unless something totally unexpected happens to catch my interest again. Yeah, like that's going to happen.

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