"Crash" General Hospital: Night Shift Transcript Tussday 7/22/08

General Hospital: Night Shift Transcript Thursday 7/22/08


Written by Yolonda Lawrence & Sri Rao

Provided By Suzanne
Proofread by Gisele

Patrick: I feel like I'm back in high school.

Robin: [Chuckles] Really? Please don't tell me you were having sex with pregnant girls in high school.

Patrick: No, no. No pregnant girls as hot as you, of course.

Robin: [Gasps] You're such a charmer.

Patrick: Yes. Oh, this couch reminds me of the one in Kelly Powers' basement.

Robin: Who's Kelly Powers?

Patrick: Kelly Powers is this girl that was in our class, and she had this basement that was infamous.

Robin: Hmm. If we have a girl, we're never allowing her to have boys in the basement.

Patrick: Robin, if we have a girl, we're never having a basement.

Robin: [Giggles] Oh, I think you're right. Maybe it is time to get a new couch. Hey, do you want to go shopping this weekend? Oh, sorry, I forgot: Couch shopping equals commitment, so--

Patrick: No, Robin. We're having a baby together. I can handle getting a couch together.

Robin: Well, see? That's progress.

Patrick: I just can't handle shopping together.

Robin: Well, fine. Then you don't get a say in what we get. And I was thinking pink, maybe floral.

Patrick: You can get purple paisley for all I care, as long as it has a recliner and a cup holder.

Robin: Oh, no, no, no, no. Not going to happen.

Patrick: Yes. Come on.

Robin: No. Remember, you do not get a say. Technically, you don't live here.

Patrick: Squatter's rights.

Robin: Then come shopping. Come on, maybe we can test drive a couple before we buy.

Patrick: Really? Right there in the store, huh?

Robin: You do realize every high school has a Kelly Powers?

Patrick: Oh, yeah? And who was yours?

Robin: Take a wild guess.

Patrick: Hello, Miss Powers.

Then you say "maybe tomorrow"

Epiphany: Look, I am trying to keep my head above water.

Dr. Ford: Which is why I'm trying to help you by hiring new staff.

Epiphany: If you want to help me, I could use two weeks off and a one-way ticket to the Bahamas.

Dr. Ford: Look, here are the candidates for the orderly position. You'll interview them tonight, tomorrow night, and--

Epiphany: I am not Barbara Walters. I don't do interviews.

Dr. Ford: I'll expect your recommendations by the end of the week.

Epiphany: You're welcome. [Sighs] Like I have time to interview every Tom, Dick, and Harry that walks into this place. Who does he think is running this joint anyway? You know, I should just take off to the Bahamas and see what they would do around here then. I could be sitting out there drinking a piña colada with a cabana boy.

Touissant: You mind if I join you? I haven't been to the Bahamas in years.

Epiphany: Touissant.

Touissant: But before we go, I'm here to interview for that new job.

Kyle: Which way to the jousting ring?

Claire: What? Oh, right. I think it's somewhere between the human chessboard and my dignity: Far, far away.

Kyle: It's not that bad. It's very wench couture.

Claire: Yeah, no more dates that require period garb.

Kyle: This wasn't your first?

Claire: Sadly, no. This was, however, the first time I got felt up by a fire-eater.

Kyle: Ah, Renaissance Fair: Where dates go to die.

Claire: Oh, I mean, what is the problem? Is it too much to ask for a guy who doesn't want me to dress up like a prostitute? Or someone, I don't know, who can actually have a conversation without touching his crotch? Because if your hand is on top of your pants, you're still touching it. For God's sake, leave the junk alone!

Kyle: I haven't touched mine all day. I don't even know if they're still there.

Claire: You know what? I'm done. I'm serious. I can't do it anymore. It's not fair, you know? I'm--I'm educated. I'm relatively good-looking. I know how to dress. Ok, this is a bad case in point, but I did not have time to go home and change. And, I mean, I'm a freaking doctor.

Kyle: We're doctors.

Claire: So screw them.

Kyle: Screw the wench lovers.

Claire: Hey, do you have any room in there for this thing? The fire-eater guy has a big show this weekend, said he might take me.

Leo: I hope you're all decent in here. Good. There's nothing I hate more than ugly naked people. My name is Dr. Leo Julian, and for reasons beyond my control, never make a bet on half a bottle of tequila. I will be your attending. Now, if what I just said and the tone with which I said it is not enough of a clue, I'm not happy to be here. As such, my goal is to spend as little time as possible with all of you. So rule number one, only speak to me when I'm addressing you directly. Rule number two--we've got two, comes after one--don't be stupid. And rule number--here it comes -- 3, don't be stupid. We've got rounds.

Claire: What is his problem?

Kyle: Oh, didn't you see him at Ren Fair? He was the one with a jousting pole stuck up his ass.

[Claire giggles]

Kyle: I'm Kyle.

Claire: I'm Claire. Nice to meet you.

Dr. Ford: Nice of you to join us a half-hour late.

Patrick: Sorry, chief. Tried to get here on time, but Robin needed me for a consult.

Robin: Trust me, it didn't take him that long.

Patrick: Hey. Ok, what do we got? Broken arm in two, second-degree burn in 3.

Robin: Food poisoning in one, and 4 with severe diarrhea? That one's all yours.

Patrick: That one has acute migraine with intermediate hallucinations in 6.

Robin: Oh, no, no, no! That one's mine.

Patrick: Robin, you have diarrhea.

Robin: No, you have diarrhea. I have hallucinations with possible dementia, if I'm lucky.

Patrick: You better thank me. It's true love giving up dementia for you.

Robin: Well, I thank you, Dr. Drake, for your love and your dementia.

[Car accelerates]

[Doctor coughs]

Patrick: Robin? Hey, Robin?

Leo: Anyone hemorrhaging, not breathing, or unconscious takes priority!

Patrick: Robin, don't do this to me. Hey.

Kyle: What can I do?

Patrick: I need a C.T. of her head, an ultrasound of her abdomen. Make sure the placenta's still intact.

Epiphany: I need you to stop moving. You could have internal injuries.

Alice: I feel really weird.

Epiphany: Ok--

Jerry: Alice.

Epiphany: How much have you had to drink?

Jerry: She says to stay in the car.

Epiphany: How much has she had to drink?

Leo: Don't fail me now. Come on!

Saira: Asystole or V-fib?

Leo: I can't tell without a monitor.

Saira: We need a crash cart over here! He needs an amp of epi and some atropine!

Leo: I'm going to lose this guy.

Saira: Here, let me.

[Patient gasps]

Leo: Get coags and a troponin level, and notify the cath lab of a possible angioplasty. Go. That's not too bad for an intern.

Saira: I'm not an intern. Dr. Saira Batra, visiting fellow.

Robin: Patrick?

Patrick: Hey, hey, hey, hey. I'm right here. I'm right here. Get the Doppler. I want to check her FHTS and make sure the baby's still moving.

Kyle: Got it. Is there any danger of preeclampsia?

Patrick: Yeah. We're going to check her protein. We need to get that C.T. Stat.

Dr. Ford: Does anyone else need medical attention?

Kyle: Oh, my God?

Patrick: What? Dr. Ford--

Dr. Ford: Dr. Drake. What's going on?

Patrick: You're going to be ok. Someone get a gurney over here!

Dr. Ford: What the hell are you talking about?

Patrick: Hey, chief, look at me.

Dr. Ford: Huh?

Patrick: Don't--don't pull--no, no, no, don't! Hey, no, don't--

Patrick: I want to thank you all for your hard work last night. It's times like this we realize that the staff at G.H. are the best. It's nice to see some old, familiar faces back on staff, and some newbies, too. Nothing like trial by fire, right? What we do as doctors and nurses is we fix people. And when we fail at that mission every once in a while, it can be pretty tough, particularly when it's one of our own. So in memory of Dr. Ford, I want us to, uh-- he would want us to move on from this.

Epiphany: He'd want us to get back to work.

Patrick: Yes, he would. So, everybody, let's get back to work, all right? Oh, and real quickly, the, uh, the board shows a temporary replacement for chief.

Leo: Who?

Patrick: Well, it's--it's me.


Robin: Hmm. This the tenth time you've checked my vitals today.

Patrick: Can't be too cautious.

Robin: So how'd it go?

Patrick: Well, it's official. You're sleeping with the chief of staff.

Robin: Patrick, that's amazing. Isn't it?

Patrick: You know how I live to feel superior.

Robin: You're going to do a great job. Speaking of jobs, Kelly was by again today. She said everything looks great and that I should be able to go back to work.

Patrick: Robin, it could've been a lot worse, you know that?

Robin: Maybe, but it wasn't. So I appreciate the day of rest, boss, but it's time for Mama to get back to work.

Patrick: Been meaning to talk to you about that.

Robin: What's up?

Patrick: I think it'd be a good idea if you took some time off until the baby comes.

Robin: [Laughs] And what, stay home barefoot and pregnant?

Patrick: No. You can wear shoes.

Robin: You know, I think it's great that you are concerned in your own quintessential sexist way. But I will be fine: Me and the baby.

Patrick: I don't think you understand.

Robin: Understand what?

Patrick: I'm relieving you of your duties.

Robin: What? What a second. Are you firing me?

P.A.: Dr. Henso to surgery, please. Dr. Henso.

Leo: All right. Who'd like to present the case? Blondie, it's yours.

Claire: Ok. Um, patient is a 65-year-old female complaining of shortness of breath, cough, and fever. She was given 80 milligrams of furosemide and has voided 450 ccs so far.

Leo: Did we check her electrolytes before giving her the diuretic?

Claire: Um, yes, and her potassium's normal.

Leo: And what if her potassium level drops because of the diuretic? What would you do?

Claire: I would, uh, repeat the furosemide?

Leo: Wrong. This is pharmacology 101. I suggest you spend a little bit more time catching up on your caseload and just a little less catching up on your soaps.

Kyle: Yeah, I think what she meant was that she'd run a repeat potassium level first to be sure it was still within normal range, and then give the furosemide.

Leo: Is that right? So tell me this, then, in your esteemed opinion, what are the 3 early signs we look for in respiratory failure?

Kyle: Rapid heart rate, rapid breathing, and restlessness.

Leo: What about cyanosis?

Kyle: Cyanosis isn't an early sign and occurs secondary to the un-oxygenation of hemoglobin in the capillaries.

Leo: Recommended course of treatment?

Kyle: I'd get blood gases, start I.V. Fluids, and increase her oxygen.

Leo: And run the risk of bacterial pneumonia because you neglected to start her on an antibiotic? This isn't med school anymore. When you're wrong here, people die. The correct answer is you get a sputum culture and you hit the infection hard with a kick-ass antibiotic.

Saira: Actually, Dr. Julian, I'll be treating the patient with a course of acupuncture on her ears and feet.

Leo: What? [Laughs] That's ridiculous.

Saira: Medicine isn't an exact science, Dr. Julian. There isn't always one correct answer. I'd imagine that's something you'd want your students to learn.

Patrick: Stop being so dramatic. I'm not firing you.

Robin: Well, that's certainly what it sounds like to me.

Patrick: I'm just putting you on maternity leave early.

Robin: And without my consent. And you know what? If this is how you're going to be making decisions as the new chief of staff, then you've got something else coming to you. Because can you say "employ--" help. Thank you. "Employment discrimination"? Because that's exactly what this is.

Patrick: For you or for me?

Robin: Firing a woman from your staff because she's pregnant is discrimination.

Patrick: Robin--

Robin: And I will be the first person to bring a lawsuit against you and this hospital.

Patrick: Ok, first of all, I'm looking out for the hospital's best interest. It's way too dangerous for you to be working here: Demonstrated last night.

Robin: That was an accident.

Patrick: And a huge liability for the hospital. And second of all, I'm looking out for our family's best interest. Robin, you're not just a doctor anymore, you're the mother of our child.

Robin: Really? I thought I just needed to cut back on the carbs.

Patrick: Your first priority should be bringing this baby into the world safe and healthy.

Robin: No, my first priority is going home. Not because I'm quitting, but because my ankles are swollen to the size of rutabagas. And I do have a priority of bringing this child safe and healthy into this world, which is why I'm leaving now. Because if I don't, this child will be born behind bars.

Patrick: Because you're going to--

Robin: Murder its father, yes.

Patrick: Ok. Ok. Well, then, yeah, you should go home and just relax, and I'll--I'll see you there later.

Robin: Oh, no, no, no. Don't bother coming home. I'm changing the locks.

Alice: I can't believe that doctor died.

Epiphany: Neither can we.

Jerry: We're not going to get, like, arrested or anything, are we? Because we didn't actually hit him, you know?

Epiphany: That's between you and the authorities. You gave them your statement, didn't you?

Jerry: Yeah. Yeah. As far as I remember.

Patrick: You know you're lucky you walked away with only a couple of broken ribs? You realize that?

Alice: Yes, sir, I do.

Patrick: I suppose you know what happened last night all because of your irresponsible behavior?

Jerry: It was an accident.

Patrick: Who are you?

Jerry: I'm her boyfriend.

Alice: Fiancé. That's Jerry. We just got engaged last night.

Epiphany: Congratulations.

Alice: But that's where we were. We were celebrating down at Jake's.

Jerry: I gave her the ring at dinner, and then a bunch of our buddies came out for drinks.

Alice: But then I started to feel a little, I don't know, weird. Like, dizzy or something.

Patrick: So what were you on?

Alice: Excuse me?

Patrick: What drugs were you on? Or was it booze that caused you to crash into the E.R. and take out everyone in sight?

Alice: No. I didn't mean to.

Patrick: Where do you get off? Do you know you killed a man last night? You realize that? And you could've killed a lot more people all because of your stupid decision to get behind the wheel when you were too wasted to even walk straight!

Epiphany: Dr. Drake?

Alice: I'm sorry.

Epiphany: Alice's blood work came in this afternoon. We ran it twice, but there's no alcohol or drugs in her system. She's clean.

[Shower running]

Patrick: Robin? I thought you might've had the door booby-trapped. But I'm sure you're feeling better, right, after a good night's sleep. I hope. Trust me, you're not going to want to come back to work after this baby's born. And that's all right because it's up to you. It's your body. It's your career. You are woman, hear you roar.

[Water stops]

Patrick: So why don't you get that sexy body out here and let me hear you roar?

Jagger: Thanks, but, uh, aren't you going to buy me dinner first?

Patrick: Who the hell are you?

Jagger: You must be Patrick.

Patrick: What the hell are you doing coming out of Robin's bedroom?

Jagger: I was just taking a shower.

Patrick: That doesn't make me feel any better.

Robin: Ok, I could -- oh, you two met.

Patrick: Robin, why the hell is there a half-naked man coming out of your bedroom?

Jagger: Sorry about that.

Robin: This is Jagger.

Patrick: What's a Jagger.

Jagger: That's my name.

Patrick: That's my shirt.

Robin: It's ok. I said he could borrow it.

Patrick: Because?

Robin: Because he's our guest. Patrick, this is Jagger, my incredibly dear old friend. He's Stone's older brother?

Patrick: Oh. Hey. Nice to meet you.

Jagger: You, too. I heard so much about you. I'm sorry if I scared you a bit.

Patrick: No, no, no, it's all right. I just--you know, I'm glad it wasn't a burglary or something. I wouldn't have to mess you up. You know how that goes.

Robin: A burglar in a towel?

Patrick: Anyway--

Robin: Anyway, so I came home last night, and guess who was waiting for me at the door.

Patrick: Jagger.

Robin: I couldn't believe it. I mean, how long has it been? 10? 15?

Jagger: It's been 13 years since I left Port Charles.

Patrick: Yeah, so what brings you back?

Jagger: Well, I had a meeting in Albany and thought I'd stop by.

Patrick: What do you do?

Robin: He's an F.B.I. agent.

Patrick: Hmm.

Jagger: I figured I couldn't stop by without reconnecting with my old friends. There's a lot I miss about this place, you know?

Robin: Hmm. Well, get settled because you and I have a lot to catch up on.

Jagger: OK.

Robin: I brought breakfast. Oh, wait a minute. Did you do this?

Patrick: No. That was me.

Robin: Really? Well, don't think it's going to get you out of the doghouse.

Patrick: Of course not.

Robin: You, come over here. You're probably very hungry. There is some bagels, croissants, and coffee. Do you drink coffee?

Jagger: Yeah, sure.

Robin: Ok.

Patrick: All right, well, I'll let you two catch up. I got some work to do in the bedroom anyway, so--

Jagger: Listen, it was nice meeting you, and thanks for breakfast.

Patrick: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Nice to meet you, also. And put some pants on.

Jagger: Oh, sorry. [Laughs]

Claire: Hey, you.

Kyle: Oh, thanks. Well, you seem perky today.

Claire: You know what, I've decided that things can't possibly get any worse.

Kyle: Uh-oh: Famous last words.

Claire: No, I'm serious. I mean, what else is there? I am completely exhausted. I have no clue what I'm doing. Our attending hates me.

Kyle: He doesn't hate you. He just doesn't know how to express his love.

Claire: And the chief of staff basically--oh, no, the former chief of staff basically died in my arms.

Kyle: Ouch.

Claire: All in the first 3 days.

Kyle: Yeah, that's the bottom of the barrel.

Claire: Yeah, thank you.

Leo: Oh. I'm sorry.

Saira: Nothing we haven't all seen before.

Leo: I wouldn't say I've seen anything like this before.

Saira: Yeah. They warned me about you.

Leo: Don't believe them. Dr. Leo Julian. I don't think we formally met.

Saira: Are you the official welcome wagon?

Leo: At your service. So what brings you to G.H., aside from the handsome physicians?

Saira: That was it, actually. Is there more?

Leo: Much more.

Saira: I'm, uh, here to pilot a program in holistic medicine.

Leo: Ah. So you're hocking your potions and spells?

Saira: No. Holistic medicine. I'll be integrating alternative therapies into our practice: Acupuncture, ayurveda, energy healing.

Leo: Which is why you're giving my interns all that crap about mind-body medicine, yeah?

Saira: Get with the times, doctor. Mind-body medicine has become a critical component of patient care.

Leo: Yeah. Maybe in some Ashram in Mongolia.

Saira: Or maybe right here in G.H.

Leo: Look, you can believe whatever you want. But in the future, I don't appreciate the way you spoke to me in front of my interns. It's not the way we treat doctors around here.

Saira: And what about the way you treated Mrs. Shelby?

Leo: Who's Mrs. Shelby?

Saira: Mrs. Shelby is my patient. The woman who's been struggling to breathe for the last 5 days? You walked in there and started with your battery of questions without saying hello to her or asking her how she felt or even if you had the permission to barge into her room like that. My concern isn't how I treat the doctors in this hospital. My concern is how I treat the patients.

Jagger: You know, San Francisco is an amazing town full of life and culture.

Robin: I hear it's beautiful.

Jagger: It is.

Robin: Hmm.

Jagger: You know, Karen and I really felt at home out there.

Robin: I'm so sorry about her death. That must've been really hard on you.

Jagger: It was. And even after the divorce, I still loved her.

Robin: Well, yeah. That's what first love is like. It doesn't really go away: Like me and Stone.

Patrick: Oh, you guys still at it?

Jagger: Patrick, I want to thank you for letting me steal your girlfriend for the whole day.

Patrick: No worries. Just don't get used to it.

Robin: Bye.

Patrick: All right, well, I'm off to work. I got to run some tests on that girl that crashed into the E.R.

Robin: The drunk driver?

Patrick: More like sober driver. Can't figure out why she lost control. What are your plans?

Robin: Oh, I'm just going to hang out with Jagger for a bit and probably head to bed early.

Patrick: Oh, you will?

Robin: Yeah. I could use the rest. You were right.

Patrick: I was? Hmm. Ok. Well, then, Jagger, if I don't see you before you leave, nice meeting you.

Jagger: You, too.

Patrick: And I'll see you next time you're here, hopefully with more clothes on.

Jagger: I'll work on that.

Patrick: And, you, I'll see you when I get home.

Robin: Absolutely.

Patrick: Ok, bye.

Robin: Bye. Have a good day.

Patrick: Yeah.

Robin: Aah! Thank God he's gone. Ok, you don't mind just entertaining yourself a bit while I get ready, do you?

Jagger: Where are you going?

Robin: I'm going to work.

Jagger: But, wait, I thought that you were going to--

Robin: Oh, please, that was the only way that I could get him out of here before he handcuffed me to the coffee table. If he really thinks that I'm going to roll over that easy, he's more clueless than I thought.

Jagger: You're amazing.

Robin: Well, thank you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must get ready for battle.

Patrick: Ok, smile for me.

Alice: I'm sorry?

Patrick: Just look me in the eyes and smile. Checking to see if your facial movements are symmetrical. Have you been out of the country in the last 3 months?

Alice: Me? No. I've barely ever been out of Port Charles.

Patrick: I'm just ruling out the possibility of parasites.

Alice: Dr. Drake, what's wrong with me?

Patrick: I don't know if anything is wrong with you right now. Your C.T. scans came back normal, your motor functions are intact, and you're not experiencing any memory loss.

Alice: I swear I'm not lying. I felt really weird, tingly that night. That's why we came to the hospital. You have to believe me.

Patrick: I do. I'm going to order an M.R.I. And see if there's anything else we can find.

[Security lock beeps]

[Robin groans]


Robin: Damn it!

Saira: Hey, Robin. What's wrong?

Robin: I can't believe he locked me out.

Saira: Here.


Robin: Thank you.

Saira: You're welcome.

Robin: Guys are so unbelievable. I mean, I really don't understand why we let them get away with it. I swear, Patrick acts like we're in the 1950s, like he gets a say in what I do with my career.

Saira: Is this the maternity leave thing?

Robin: Oh, yeah. How'd you know?

Saira: It was bound to come up sooner or later.

Robin: I mean, it's 2008. We practically had a female president. How does he not get that a woman has just as many rights as a man in the workplace?

Saira: You have not changed at all.

Robin: What?

Saira: This is just like med school, when you'd get all up at arms about abortion or euthanasia or--setting all the animals free from the research labs?

Robin: Well, yes. The mice deserve better.

Saira: All I'm saying is, are you just standing on principle again?

Robin: I don't know what you're taking about.

Saira: Well, are you ready to stop working?

Robin: I don't know. I don't think so.

Saira: Well, when will you be?

Robin: I don't know. You know, I haven't really thought about it.

Saira: Well, then maybe you should. Because maybe Patrick's right, and you're just fighting him because, well, you like to fight.

Robin: I hate you! Why are you here?

[Locker slams]

Saira: Um, you invited me.

Robin: Well, I'm uninviting you, ok? Go home. Good-bye. You know what? I don't like to fight.

Saira: You're welcome.

[Toussaint chuckles]

Toussaint: Oh, huh.

Epiphany: Whew. It's one of those nights.

Toussaint: You know, I--I didn't thank you for giving me this job.

Epiphany: Oh, please. You jumped in there like you had never left. And plus, you saved me all that hassle of doing those interviews.

Toussaint: Still, I appreciate the opportunity.

Epiphany: So what happened? The last I heard, you were back on the road with the saints. That must've been a-- [Laughs]

Toussaint: Oh, it was. It was a blast. Every night was a showstopper, but the best part was it gave me a kick in the butt.

Epiphany: Why is that?

Toussaint: The guys reminded me that I'm not dead yet. But I can't spend the rest of my life on the road, you know?

Epiphany: Amen.

Toussaint: So I figured that I'm not too old to start something new. So that's why I'm back. I put myself into class, I'm going to get a diploma, and hopefully a new career.

Epiphany: That's wonderful.

Toussaint: I'll start out as an orderly and work my way up, maybe become an E.M.T., maybe a nurse. Who knows? []

[Epiphany laughs]

Toussaint: Although, I've got some pretty big shoes to fill in that department.

Robin: This is ridiculous.

Patrick: What happened to staying home?

Robin: What happened to all of my patients?

Patrick: They're not your patients anymore since you decided to go on leave.

Robin: And I didn't decide to do anything. I was forcibly removed.

Patrick: You'll have to excuse me. I have more pressing matters to attend to as acting chief of staff.

Robin: Oh, really? Fine. Well, don't worry about the board.

Patrick: I won't.

Robin: Because there are plenty of patients in this hospital, and I don't need your help in finding any.

Patrick: Good. I'm glad we agree. Hey, Robin, wait.

Alice: "Whatever it was, I found it. In that moment, I knew I was looking at love." You can kiss me now.

Robin: I--sorry to interrupt.

Alice: Oh, no, that's ok. It was just my journal. It's stupid.

Robin: No, that's sweet. Young love: Enjoy it while it lasts. [Chuckles]

Patrick: Dr. Scorpio, how considerate of you to check in on my patients for me.

Robin: Of course. I'm always happy to consult, Dr. Drake. My caseload seems unusually light tonight. I was just about to go over Alice's M.R.I. with her.

Patrick: Alice, I went over your test results. Nothing seems to be out of the ordinary.

Jerry: But why did she lose control of the car?

Alice: Oh, my God. You're the woman I hit that night.

Robin: Yeah.

Alice: I'm so, so sorry.

Robin: It's ok.

Alice: I don't know what's going on. I know I seem crazy. Maybe I should just go home, stop wasting everybody's time. I've already made such a mess--me--

Patrick: Alice?

Robin: Patrick.

Patrick: Get out of the way.

Jerry: What is it? What's going on?

Patrick: She's having a stroke.

Jerry: Is she going to be ok?

Robin: It's hard to tell. Fortunately, she had the stroke when she was in the hospital. But looking back, her symptoms may indicate that she's had several smaller strokes over the past couple of days.

Jerry: Why didn't you guys catch this?

Robin: Stroke diagnosis is a tricky thing. Unfortunately, we don't usually suspect it in someone Alice's age.

Jerry: She's only 26.

Robin: Does she smoke?

Jerry: Yeah.

Robin: And she's on birth control, right?

Jerry: Yeah.

Robin: Sometimes that can increase the risk.

Jerry: What does this mean? We were supposed to get married. You know, we were talking about going out to Vegas, going on a honeymoon.

Robin: Well, you might want to put those plans off for a little while. The latest M.R.I. showed that she had bleeding in the left side of the brain. We're prepping her for emergency surgery to avoid any brain damage.

Jerry: Is she going to die?

Robin: I don't know what to tell you except that Dr. Drake is the best. He is going to do everything he can to pull her through this. But I have to be honest with you. You both have a long road ahead of you.

Leo: Dr. Drake, you mind if I scrub in?

Patrick: Actually, we're standing room only right now.

Leo: Come on, let me assist. I've never see a craniotomy before. I'll let you pick out the music.

Patrick: A couple of interns already asked to observe. Next time.

Leo: What do you think you're doing?

Kyle: We volunteered.

Leo: Yeah, and who's covering grand rounds while you're in here on your little field trip?

Kyle: It was slow in the E.R., so I thought I would just--

Leo: Let's get something straight. Your job is not to think, your job is not to volunteer. You're a first-year intern. Your job is to listen and do what you're told.

Claire: It's not his fault. It was my idea.

Leo: So, what, now you got your little girlfriend to fight your battles for you? You're wasting your time, sweetie. He's really not into you.

Epiphany: Let's go, people. I have a girl in here with a ruptured artery in her brain.

Leo: Go. Not you.

Kyle: You just cannot stand the fact that I'm here, can you?

Leo: If it were up to me, no, I wouldn't let you into this program.

Kyle: Why are you so threatened by me?

Leo: Don't flatter yourself.

Kyle: What, is it because you know that I'm going to show you up? That all of these people are going to figure out that a lowly intern's a better doctor?

Leo: You've got no idea what it means to be a doctor. You actually have to work for this.

Kyle: Yeah, I can handle it.

Leo: Right, except Mommy and Daddy aren't going to hand this one to you on a silver platter.

Kyle: Shut up.

Leo: Make me.

Kyle: You think I won't?

Leo: I think you can't.

Kyle: Get off me.

Patrick: No compression of the ocular motor nerve.

Robin: And no midline shift.

Patrick: That's good. Dr. Simpson, how are the pupils?

Claire: Sluggish but reactive.

Patrick: What artery is this right here?

Claire: The middle meningeal artery.

Patrick: And what intracranial landmark indicates it?

Claire: That convex portion of the cerebrum slightly posterior to the temporal lobe.

Patrick: Good. Looks like you may be getting the hang of this place after all.

Looks like I'm on my own my own, my own

Patrick: Gentlemen, it's been a very long night and this is the last thing I need. One of you care to explain what happened?

Leo: He started it.

Kyle: He's been on my case ever since--

Leo: If you could do your job properly.

Kyle: Maybe if you get out of my face.

Patrick: Ok, enough, both of you. Dr. Julian, getting into a wrestling match outside the O.R.? What kind of example are you setting? I expect more out of an attending. And you, I don't know much you. But if this is your idea of a good first impression, I'd start looking for another job because you're going to be out on your ass.

Kyle: I'm sorry.

Patrick: Where'd you come from anyway? "Kyle Julian"? Do you guys know each other?

Kyle: Barely.

Leo: We're brothers.

Patrick: You're brothers? Ok, both of you, out. If you bring any more of this crap in the hospital, I'll send you both home crying to Mommy.

Leo: Patrick, you mind if--

Patrick: Leo, out.

Claire: Dude, what happened to you?

Kyle: Don't ask. Ow. What are we doing here?

Claire: I don't know. It's not so bad, is it?

Kyle: What? I thought you hated it here.

Claire: I'm overwhelmed, yeah.

Kyle: Promise me this. Whatever happens...

Claire: We'll get through it together.

Kyle: I was going to say that you be the frontman if there's another fistfight.

Claire: [Laughs] Done. When Dr. Julian said-- you know, when he said that you weren't into me -- I mean -- you're gay, aren't you?

Kyle: Yeah. Oh, Claire. I'm sorry, I thought you knew. I didn't mean to --

Claire: No, no, no, no. I mean, it's my own fault. I should've known. I was actually really starting to be into you. It should've been a dead giveaway. Since you're not going to see me naked.

Robin: Jerry? Where are you going?

Jerry: I can't do this. I--I want to, I do, but I'm 25, right? I can't--I can't spend the rest of my life...

Robin: Caring for the person that you love?

Jerry: I know you think I'm a horrible person, but I wasn't expecting this. This isn't supposed to happen to people our age.

Robin: Listen, you can lose your health at any age, any day. I mean, trust me, I know.

Jerry: I love her, I do. But I--I can't watch her turn into this.

Robin: That's not love, Jerry. When you love someone, you accept everything about them, even the things you didn't bargain for.

Jerry: I'm sorry.

Patrick: Hey.

Robin: Hey. I'm sorry.

Patrick: No.

Robin: Go back to sleep.

Patrick: I'm exhausted.

Robin: [Chuckles] Thank you.

Patrick: For what?

Robin: For always sticking by me. For never bailing, even when things get rough.

Patrick: You're welcome.

Robin: I'm still not quitting.

Patrick: How did I guess?

Robin: [Laughs] Look, I admit there is a part of what you're saying that's valid.

Patrick: Oh.

Robin: A part. But this is a big decision, and you can't make it for me.

Patrick: And you can't make it without me. Robin, when I saw you lying unconscious on the floor--

Robin: Hey. It's ok. Look, I'm ok.

Patrick: No, I know. But I didn't know what was going to happen to you. I didn't know what was going to happen to our baby. And--and I thought, you know what? We're a family now, and I think it's time we start making decisions like one.

Robin: Ok.

Patrick: Not on this crappy sofa.

Robin: [Laughs] Ok, decision number one as a family...

Patrick: We go shopping for a new sofa together.

Robin: Yeah.

Patrick: Yeah.

Robin: You took the words right out of my mouth.

[Knock on door]

Patrick: Oh, God, go away.

Robin: Who is it?

Jagger: It's Jagger.

Patrick: What does he want?

Robin: I don't know. He was supposed to be headed back to Albany.

Patrick: Ok--no, don't go. Don't go. He better have more clothes on this time.

Robin: Oh, stop.

Jagger: Hi.

Robin: Hey.

Jagger: Sorry to interrupt.

Robin: Oh, no, no, that's ok. What's up?

Jagger: Um, there's someone I want you to meet. This is my son, Stone.

Robin: Oh, my God.

Jagger: Um, Stone, this is your Aunt Robin.

Robin: Hi. Hey. It's nice to meet you.

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