Days of Our Lives Best Lines Thursday 1/17/13

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Nicole: Hello, there, stranger.

Brady: Nicole.

Nicole: Oh, my God, what happened to your face?

Brady: Uh, it's not as bad as it looks, okay? It's fine.

Nicole: I should see the other guy, right?

Jennifer: You do realize that Chloe and Daniel have been apart for over two years.

Kate: So?

Jennifer: So he doesn't love her.

Kate: So?

Jennifer: So I'm not threatened, Kate.

Kate: Well, you should be. Because Chloe has certain, shall we say, "talents," that you lack.

Jennifer: [Chuckles]

Kate: I mean, do I really-- do I need to spell this out for you? She's a liar, and she's a slut. And it's really hard to say which one she's better at. But she definitely knows how to push all of Daniel's buttons. And she knows where they all are. And she pushes them hard.

Jennifer: I am not gonna listen to this anymore.

Kate: Why, because it's true? You know, men always think that they want to settle down with a nice girl, but when the time really comes, they just don't think.

Jennifer: We are done! We are done here, Kate. Leave! Now!

Kate: Fine, fine. But one more thing. You're a mother, and if anything happens to that little boy--if Chloe suddenly vanishes in a fit of pique and rips Parker away from Daniel one more time-- and you know that there's something that you could have done about it, and you didn't, I hope you can live with yourself.

Jennifer: [Sighs]

Kristen: I'm so happy I could help you sleep better at night, knowing that there was another man in my bed, and therefore there would be no room for your husband in it. Not that I would be even remotely interested because I've moved on. I just wish you could too.

Marlena: You are unbelievable.

Kristen: You're so uptight. I mean, even more so than usual. Is it maybe because this conversation wasn't as productive as you hoped it would be?

Marlena: No, it wasn't.

Kristen: I've tried so hard to be reasonable. I can just tell though, you're just not gonna be receptive to the olive branch that I keep extending to you, time and time again.

Marlena: This was a mistake.

Kristen: Hey, Marlena.

Billie: Well, I take it things went well.

Kate: People are so predictable, aren't they?

Billie: I know what you mean.

Kate: Well, sit down. Prepare to enjoy the fireworks, because by the end of today, Daniel is going to know exactly who Chloe Lane really is.

Chloe: You may wish that you could be struck by lightning and end it all, but I have a very good reason to keep going. His name is Parker, and he's going to bond me and Daniel forever.

Nicole: Oh, my God, you are delusional.

Chloe: No, you are delusional if you think he ever cared for you! He probably felt sorry for you! He wanted to share a life with me and our child! And now that we know that Parker is his, I'm gonna get him back, whether you like it or not.

Nicole: Yeah, well, have fun with that, okay? But don't come crying to me when Daniel's asking to change custody weekends because he and Jenn-Jenn are going on their honeymoon.

Chloe: You should try one of those on for size 'cause there isn't a guy left in this town who hasn't taken you for a spin and then thrown you out like trash!

[Thud]

[Typing]

Anne: You're gonna have to take a seat.

Chloe: Anne, hey.

Anne: I--I'm sorry, Chloe. I'm so sorry. If only we could all institute Ms. Horton's 20-minute work schedule entailing zero actual work, I'd make it out of here before 9:00 P.M. I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to cancel our lunch.

Chloe: Really? That's too bad.

Anne: Yeah, well... I hate her.

Chloe: Yeah, I mean, honestly, I've never really understood why everyone thinks she's so sweet and perfect.

Anne: Finally, somebody who understands.

Chloe: Oh, I do. And between the two of us... I'm thinking we can figure out something to make the situation better...for everyone.

Kate: So I just saw Daniel talking to Jennifer, so despite her protest, clearly she wasted no time, and he's probably hearing all about Chloe's sordid secret as we speak.

Billie: Or maybe they were just talking about the weather.

Kate: Yes, about how hurricane Chloe is going to blow back out to sea, hopefully never to return again.

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