Days of Our Lives Best Lines Tuesday 8/21/12
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Provided By Mishy
EJ Stefano's dead. They positively identified the body.
Ian: Oh, come on, you can't blame the crack police force for missing this one.
EJ: I have a little bit of experience when it comes to this, Ian. I know a fake when I see one.
Will: I'm not doing that. I'm not doing that.
Sonny: You know what my friend told me once? That when you're gay, and you break up with someone, you have to do it twice. Because they don't hear you the first time. And I'm starting to think that applies to you coming out as well.
Will: So I'm not gay enough for you if I'm not, um... what, flaunting it all over town all the damn time?
Sonny: No, you're not gay enough if you're pretending to be someone you're not. You're already out! You came out. It's old news. And the only person who didn't get the memo...is you.
Rafe: Well--well, actually, the truth is, despite his horrendous track record with you and the kids, you still seem to believe that the father of your children wouldn't do anything to be disloyal or leave you holding the bag.
Sami: He's not gonna leave me, all right? He's coming back.
Rafe: He's not.
Sami: Okay, fine. He's not. So what are we doing still sitting here? Let's go back to Salem, and you can stop acting like a ridiculously jealous ex-husband.
Ian: (to EJ) EJ, I wonder if, uh, you know what it's like to-- to love a woman. I'm not just talking about having an affair. I know you've had plenty of those, but... do you know what it's like to love a real woman?
Sami: This isn't even about EJ, and you know it. You're just mad because Carrie ran off to Switzerland with Austin.
Rafe: You mean with her husband. See, some people who are married, they actually do that. They run off with their spouses and not their exes.
Will: No, it's about you.
Sonny: No, you came out, you told everyone, now you're running right back in the closet and slamming the door.
Stefano: He... is not... a DiMera! He's a bastard. Nothing more.
Ian: [Chuckles] You know, he's right. I don't know who my real father is... but Santo filled in all of my life. You can relate to that, can't you? Once I've crack this code, I will have access to generation after generation of DiMera money squirreled away on continents all over this world. It'll make the DiMera public holdings look like pocket change. That was Santo's wish for me, and I intend to honor it.
Sami: Simple question. Are you the father of Nicole's baby or not?
Rafe: Yes. Be quiet and eat. And remember, I'm the cop, and you're the suspect, and I'm the one who gets to ask the questions.
Marlena: Oh, hey, honey. Well, Sydney slept right through. Johnny was up to ask where his mother is. And something's bothering you. What is it?
Will: [Sighs] Can I ask you a question?
Marlena: May you ask me a question? Of course you may. Sit down.
Will: How can I figure out who I am if everyone else already thinks that they know?
Marlena: Oh, okay. Well, do you want the grandma answer or the psychiatrist answer?
Will: I would like both.
EJ: [Panting]; Why would you think that my well-being is gonna matter to him? If you're waiting for some latent paternal protection to rise up, you're gonna be waiting a very long time! And I'll be long dead.
EJ: This is funny to you, is it?
Ian: It's actually-- it's actually hilariously funny. You know, my intention was to take everything away from him. I was gonna take his fortune. I was gonna take his wife. I was gonna take his offspring.
EJ: Yeah, well I'm not his son!
Ian: Do you think that letter from Alice was authentic? How difficult do you really think it is to switch blood types? Oh, come on, I'm surprised at you. You have experience in that department, no? It's true. It's an immutable fact. You...and Stefano... father and son. In spirit and in blood.
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