The Bold and The Beautiful Best Lines Thursday 5/24/12

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Bill: You might say I'm your fairy godfather.

Deacon: And what do you want?

Bill: The question is, what do you want, Deacon?

Deacon: Do I know you?

Bill: I might be one of those people you, uh, swindled, extorted, stole from.

Deacon: It sounds to me like you need a lawyer. I got no use for you.

Bill: Don't make assumptions. Assumptions will come back to bite you in the ass. You see, Deacon, you're not very bright. That's why you're in here. Speaking of here, how much longer you got? What, six more years?

Deacon: Yeah, I got six more years. What's it to you?

Bill: It's a stupid answer to my question. You know, I'll tell you what. Let's you and me-- let's have a little fun, because something tells me you don't get to have a lot of fun in here.

Deacon: I like games. What do you got in mind?

Bill: A quiz show. That's what we'll do. We'll do a quiz show. We'll call it "How do I stop from getting my butt kicked in the joint?" Now I will ask you-- 'cause I'm the host, right? I get to be the host, because it--it's my game, and, well, I'm out here, and--and you're in there. So when I ask you, "Would you like to get out?" Your answer is...

Deacon: Sure, I'll play along. Yeah, I'd like to get out. Did you bake me a chocolate cake with a file in it?

Bill: That's funny. You see, quiz shows-- they're fun. And no, I didn't bake you a cake, but I do have an offer for you.

Deacon: What kind of offer?

Bill: What would you do to get out of this hell hole?

Deacon: Anything. I want to see my son again.

Bill: Hmm. Well, if I do get you out, you won't be seeing your son, but you will be paying a visit to your daughter Hope. And you will do exactly as I say.

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